I have mars in Taurus the 8th house opposite Pluto in Scorpio in the 2nd house. At the 29th degree! They both are square my Leo Venus in the 11th, so the three are a part of a Mars-Venus-Pluto t-square configuration. I can confirm the family secrets thing. I’m a survivor of sexual abuse in childhood, and I found out I basically “inherited” those traumas from my maternal grandmother, so that I can assist in breaking the generational curse. I went through a period of essentially retraumatizing myself through drug use and many things that went along with it. Highly suggest people with these aspects avoid releasing/quieting the intensity with substances, alcohol included. I feel as though I’ve lived multiple lives and I am at the age where I only just now am about to have my Saturn return (next year). I will say I have regenerative power. This might baffle some, but I actually had a paranormal research group working with me a few years back..because all of the suppressed rage that was stewing inside of my body literally projected outside of myself into physical form (a poltergeist). It wasn’t until we realized I was causing it, that the activity quickly began to slow down and come to a halt. I regained my sense of control at that point, and that changed everything. It was terrifying, but a life-changing experience for me, and it reminded me to be responsible for these energies. They are surely not meant to be trapped inside. They are meant to be transmuted. I was conditioned through my environment growing up to react to the world with such vigilance, and to suppress my emotions. It wasn’t until I realized there is so much more power in acknowledging these energies and actually using them, expressing them, for something good, for the greater good even.
I swing between between being quiet as a mouse, to being too loud and even too passionate for some. Both modes have been commented on and scrutinized by people. I suppose that’s the opposition right there also, I need to integrate still. The energy only seems to display in extremes… that tired, quiet, last degree of Taurus mars mode, or my ruthless, ready for battle mode, that rarely shows itself to the public. Mostly, the outwardly raging side only comes out in romantic relationships, I have Mars square Venus as well. Sometimes I sense that I intimidate others sometimes, even though I’m a 5’0” tall woman. To be honest, anyone who knows me will tell you I’m brave.. I am brave and I know I can survive anything. However, to be honest I am intimidated by many people myself, so as a protective mechanism I utilize these Mars-Pluto energies to appear confident, untouchable, and charismatic, when I feel it’s necessary to ramp them up. Around a person in a position of authority, for example, I make sure to come across as very confident so as to not get caught up in power plays, which will happen if I am in that opposite “quiet mouse” mode that I can easily fall into. The truth is I have strong anxiety about interacting with people. I‘ve experienced first hand truly just how dark, deceitful, and utterly terrifying people can be. It is very difficult for me to trust people enough to share bits of myself with them, even though I crave intimacy so badly (moon 8th house). This isn’t talked about enough, but there’s this sort of death anxiety Pluto and Scorpio can cause…in my childhood, everyone knew me as being terrified of everything, thunderstorms, fireworks, my own 7 year old self terrified myself one Halloween upon seeing my face painted green. I cried in fear. I was afraid of my own self, too. I perceived that these were things that didn’t seem to instill fear in my siblings, friends, or peers. I interpret this, and my still-present fear of humans, as so Mars in opposition to Pluto, a social/generational planet. I perceived a difference in myself, how I moved through the world, versus(the opposition) the way others seemed to. There was very real trauma occurring regularly throughout my childhood, so the fear I had as a kid over external forces outside of myself hurting me makes sense. As a very young child, my fear of life was not concealed, I displayed it and expressed it shamelessly, in a raw, real way. It became part of my reputation growing up, to the point of where I grew to feel so ashamed of showing it once I realized my fear, my emotions, were a nuisance to other people. My thinking as a kid eventually became: people noticed my fear, it sticks out to them, I feel ashamed about it, so there must be something wrong with me, so to survive (Mars) in this society/my generation (Pluto) I must not reveal my vulnerability (hidden/not revealing: Pluto). Since this was a not so subconscious decision, it ended up being an extreme, and Mars and Pluto are both extreme and intense on their own. With extremes comes….imbalance. My whole life is about cultivating balance; Libra rising with a see-saw chart. Anyway, all of this influenced my mars-pluto urge to suppress, or rather, hide away the depths of my emotions from the visibility of others. My brother in law asked my sister once, “if she was so terrified of everything growing up, then why did she behave so recklessly and live so dangerously when she was a young adult?” Another thing, I‘m really passionate about the occult and metaphysics, and have been since I was a kid, so I will confirm that descriptor of the placement of my mars. Needless to say I find the most relief in sex and it seems to be nearly necessary for me to do regularly, its where I express myself, where I am most confident..I guess that’s my Leo Venus being the focal point of mars opposite Pluto coming out.
Knowing death and Hades‘ realm so closely, as closely as I could by my own choosing at certain points, is what eventually drove my transformations. I have overdosed 5 times and it absolutely floors me that I was lucky enough each time to have had someone find me to call an ambulance.. .Interesting tidbit here, my brother, as a teen rescued my from my first overdose, he found me. He is a Scorpio rising with mars in Scorpio, mars conjunct Pluto. He has superhuman strength, emotionally and physically. All in all, we have a very Plutonic/Scorpionic family (no surprise.) It seems I inherited the Venus square Pluto and Mars-Pluto aspects from our mother (she has the conjunction, in Virgo). Our father also had Venus square mars, his was more similar to mine, fixed: Venus in Scorpio square Mars in Leo. He had a Scorpio stellium, sun in 8th, and mars was his chart ruler. The moon is my moms chart ruler, and interestingly enough, I perceived them both as being overly-aggressive growing up, and my moon & mars are in the same sign, both making hard aspect, and both in the 8th house.
Side note: I do also have moon in the 8th, and my north node in Scorpio 2nd House is conjunct Pluto. BML in the 8th as well, if that counts for explaining trauma and the urge towards transforming. My north node conjunct Pluto confirms to me that it is my destiny to sort through this battle.. if south node Taurus 8th house is what comes easy to me, then the challenge and growth lies in integrating Pluto in a way that creates balance in my life. Pluto urges my Venus and Mars to do some real shadow work. To transform. To stay on my north nodes path. Also, Venus is not only the focal point of my Mars-Venus-Pluto t-square, and she is also my chart ruler.. sigh
/Pluto 23 degrees
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