Is she toying with me?


Well-known member
hello again :)!

Well, I'm in the closet, I like women and only two or three friends know it. My female friend knows I don't like when women are near to me because I feel nervous. Since a few months ago she is acting strange..

When we hang out in group (once a month) she always is around or looking me and sometimes hug me.. Last week, in her birth party when nobody was looking, she scratched my arm sightly, touch me and looking me lascivious and she said "me gustas (I like you)" but she is straight and I think she is toying with me and I am upset! because the next day she "doesn't remember anything".

The question is "Is she toying with me?"

edit: In my country "me gustas (I like you)" is when you feel romantic attraction to someone else. And "me caes bien (I like you)" is when you feel sympathy to other person but not love or romantic attraction.
Best to let it go !! I do not see anything interesting here !! Probably plays with you !!!


Premium Member
To me the chart does not suggest that that she is interested in you romantically.

Her significator, Mars, is in your house of romance. Your significator, Saturn, is in your 12th, so staying hidden. Those together suggest you may have some romantic interest in her?

If she is straight, then I don't really understand her behaviour. A true friend would not behave like this with you; it seems unkind.


Well-known member
I'm a little turn around on how to read this chart. If we use your 11H as her, if we turn the chart, her 11H (your 9H)'s ruler is posited in her 5H (your 3H). Not only that but her 5H ruler, Jupiter, is posited in her 11H. Her 1H ruler (Mars) is also placed in her 7H (your 5H).

It's very well possible that she may actually not be straight as well. Mars in Gemini can express itself in a multitude of ways. I've seen natal charts where it's lended itself to someone having a Queer sexual identity, be it bisexual, pansexual, or whatever term you'd like to use. Sometimes people with this placement won't think much about their dual sexual attraction. Sometimes they may not even bother labeling it or directly (Gemini is very rarely direct) addressing it. They'll accept it for what it is and not spend much time contemplating it past that.

If we work from the 7H with her as the significator, it tells a similar story though one that's much more secretive. Moon is in your 8H so her behavior gives you anxiety. Her modern 5H ruler (Pluto) is on on the cusp of the 1H in retrograde. This behavior she's exhibiting might be "testing" the waters. Getting an understanding of how you may feel about her in turn. It may even be something that's not consciously done. I feel like Pluto RX is a VERY subconscious expression of power play and dynamic understanding. With it being Pluto, it seems to add any hidden coloring to any attraction that might exist. Her traditional 5H ruler is also placed in her 11H (your 5H), again in gemini, showing any romantic attraction to be flight and disorienting. Happening as it happens and going as quickly as it makes itself present to you.

Moon is moving into her 3H. It's... Possible a conversation may occur regarding this, especially since the last aspect moon makes before leaving Virgo is a square to Saturn. Saturn is also applying to a trine to Mercury the ruler of the sign that Moon is in and, coincidentally, the sign ruling her 12H.

If we go by Dignities:
Mars receives Saturn by Triplicity (Gemini)
Pluto is in Saturn's rulership
Mercury and Venus (The sweetheart planet) is, however, in the sign of Saturn's fall. Showing the attraction (Venus ruling your 5H, Mars itself in this case) is really hecking you up pretty bad.

The 5H from her 1H if we use the 11H is riddled with a lot of anxiety and worry. Chiron in Pisces in that house shows a deep wound, specifically regarding romance and connecting with other people on a deep level.

I'm not sure if you'll likely ever get a direct answer out of her. There's a lot that seems unconscious in her behavior. If she isn't straight but is also not gay, there may be hesitancy towards acknowledging it for fear of being rejected because of her sexual identity. Until she's ready to address her own sexual hang ups, this will likely be something she'll be forever evasive over. Not just with you, but other women she may feel any level of attraction to as well.


Premium Member
Thanks, IleneK!

Yes, I like her and I feel romantic interest because she was acting special with me but I opened my eyes and I feel like a fool. :pouty: Maybe she is laughing of me right now!

Sometimes straight (or not) people don't know how/understand how to react to gay energy in another person. They might get nervous and say kind of dumb things without really intending harm. Maybe this is what happened with her. For all we know, she may remember and be embarrassed, so she might say she doesn't remember.

I agree that this is likely best, especially for you, to just let this go.
And I am sorry for your upset.
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