I need a advice, i have a doubt

[LyP]

Hello,i have south node in fourth house,in pisces
i have some fights with my mom,but my father is worse
my mom have a pisces like personality,dreamy,addicted
,destructive
my father have a virgo personality...but in the dark side,controlling,arrogant,violent,perfeccionist,
i'm not happy with him, my father Is a very materialistic person and at the same time he blocks my emotional life and so he destroy my material life
I do not know how to relate to people and I have psychological problems because of him,He is really psycho, believe me

so i was think...forth house is the "mom,family,roots house"
i and will back to my natal city after 20 years that i'm here,i will go to a poor place with my mother,and her family,i
I will not have a chance to ascend financially in any side of my life. (mother vs father)
But I think I'm finally going to be happy away from my father, his money and his material values do not matter to me anymore when I can not even get out of my bedroom when he's home,he make my cry almost all day since i was a baby
He is a monster
But at the same time he symbolizes my north node,that is in my 10 house

To be with my mother in search of some happiness would regressing in my karmic mission, (south node in pisces in fourth house)?

i just wanna to be happy
In twenty years of life I've never seen the face of happiness

 

[Osamenor]

You're making some big mistakes here: assuming that your north node = your father (it doesn't), and assuming that anything to do with your south node is automatically unhealthy regression (it's not).

South node is where you've been and what you can build on. North node is where you're going, where you need more. It's possible to get a once-upon-a-time story about your past life(s) out of your south node and its ruler and aspects involving them, but it's just a story, not necessarily a literally true past life that you lived. If it's the right story, your current life resembles it up to a point. The north node is the part of the story you get to start creating over the course of your life.

Even if you see your father in Virgo and your mother in Pisces, it doesn't follow that your nodes being placed in those signs means south node = mother and north node = father. In fact, astrology traditionally reverses those houses: tenth house is considered to be the house of the mother, because to a child, the mother is usually the more present parent, the one who "rules" the home. Fourth house is considered the father--home and roots, yes, also roots in the sense of "fatherland." You might feel that's reversed with your own parents, but even then, there are so many things any sign can mean, that it doesn't mean your nodes represent your parents.

South node in Pisces may suggest a history of being removed from the world. Fourth house indicates, as you pointed out, such things as family, roots, and home. Put them together, and we get a picture of you being trapped in the home, isolated from the world. Pisces can also be about spirituality, addiction, or mental illness. Does this sound anything like your current life, or your childhood?

Where you're going is Virgo and the tenth house. Not in the home, but out in the world. Not isolated from the world, but in it. Immersed in the body, earth, the routines that keep life going, coming back to life.

 

[LyP]

You're making some big mistakes here: assuming that your north node = your father (it doesn't), and assuming that anything to do with your south node is automatically unhealthy regression (it's not).

South node is where you've been and what you can build on. North node is where you're going, where you need more. It's possible to get a once-upon-a-time story about your past life(s) out of your south node and its ruler and aspects involving them, but it's just a story, not necessarily a literally true past life that you lived. If it's the right story, your current life resembles it up to a point. The north node is the part of the story you get to start creating over the course of your life.

Even if you see your father in Virgo and your mother in Pisces, it doesn't follow that your nodes being placed in those signs means south node = mother and north node = father. In fact, astrology traditionally reverses those houses: tenth house is considered to be the house of the mother, because to a child, the mother is usually the more present parent, the one who "rules" the home. Fourth house is considered the father--home and roots, yes, also roots in the sense of "fatherland." You might feel that's reversed with your own parents, but even then, there are so many things any sign can mean, that it doesn't mean your nodes represent your parents.

South node in Pisces may suggest a history of being removed from the world. Fourth house indicates, as you pointed out, such things as family, roots, and home. Put them together, and we get a picture of you being trapped in the home, isolated from the world. Pisces can also be about spirituality, addiction, or mental illness. Does this sound anything like your current life, or your childhood?

Where you're going is Virgo and the tenth house. Not in the home, but out in the world. Not isolated from the world, but in it. Immersed in the body, earth, the routines that keep life going, coming back to life.

thank you, osamenor,you are ever helping me


I thought it because my mother never worked in her life because she says she has mental problems, and she is so depressed and vitimist
She wants to go to our hometown because she will not need to pay rent there

My father is on the contrary, his life is to work, work,work, and just sleep at home,He never has fun, it's full of meaningless rules that get me stuck in home like an animal. in childhood I never saw him but when I saw he was beating, hanging or stabbing my mother.

His personality keeps me from doing everything, so what keeps me stuck with him is the fact that him pays the bills and my country is in a great financial crisis, add this to the fact that the school here is privatized and mine Parents did not want to give me a decent education ever i was a child, and i have been a person unemployed for seven months since leaving my usualy bad school so there is no proposal of job for me, so I am thinking of leaving far away for the poor city that i was born with my mother

But this city that is far away,and has fewer opportunities, has no water or basic sanitation, but I want to stay away from my father, and since my mother wanted a whole life to go back there, I think I'm regressing because of it

In fact, I can not go into the world in any way
I think of going there to try to study with the help of my aunt,

I'm researching if there has a school for me to study

 

[Osamenor]

In fact, I can not go into the world in any way

That's something to strive for, then. The important thing is that, over the course of your life, you get free. You take steps to get into the world, and out in the world can simply mean not trapped in the home.

I think of going there to try to study with the help of my aunt,

I'm researching if there has a school for me to study

That's a step you're taking to get free. If you go to your birth city and receive help from your aunt, that's perfectly aligned with your north/south node indicators. Anything conjunct your north node is an additional indicator of where you're going, what you need more of, what you can't get enough of. Moon can mean family, roots, land, the familiar... and Virgo is a sign associated with familiarity, close to home instead of far away.

Your entire chart, in fact, shows that the way to free yourself is to work with what you've inherited from your family--both the good and the bad. Naturally, if you grew up experiencing abuse, you have to find healing from it. That's a lifelong process for you.

 

[LyP]

That's something to strive for, then. The important thing is that, over the course of your life, you get free. You take steps to get into the world, and out in the world can simply mean not trapped in the home.



That's a step you're taking to get free. If you go to your birth city and receive help from your aunt, that's perfectly aligned with your north/south node indicators. Anything conjunct your north node is an additional indicator of where you're going, what you need more of, what you can't get enough of. Moon can mean family, roots, land, the familiar... and Virgo is a sign associated with familiarity, close to home instead of far away.

Your entire chart, in fact, shows that the way to free yourself is to work with what you've inherited from your family--both the good and the bad. Naturally, if you grew up experiencing abuse, you have to find healing from it. That's a lifelong process for you.

don't have any school there. i will not go anymore. i'm so sad, my life don't make sense, i will kill myself someday

tomorrow i will give you a "thanks" in forum,cause now i'm in cellphone and "default style" dont work here i don't know why, thank you

 

[kshantaram]

mars-venus sag asc, artistic aptitudes, mere attractions;
currently sat transit mars-venus restricting; sat sag philosophical-just;

natal sat aries 5th debilated aptitude for social work;
lord mars over asc, debilation cancelled, gradual pace of growth in luck-education-position etc.
sat elevated aspect over libra 11th for gains, and cap 2nd for finances

asc lord jup over mystic acq 3rd,
good for advisory-teaching-reformist-counselling roles;

jup transit libra 11th opp sat aries, misjudgments and missed opportunities
in matters of income-gains-friendships-education-romance etc

sun-mer scorpio 12th, research-occult-investigative aptitudes; forensic medicine, suspicious, sentimental;

moon-rahu virgo 10th, acting skills; public appeal; foreign assignments;
rise-fall, calls for ancestor worship;
wanting to rise fast in life; ambitions of paternal grandparents;

moon lord 9th for luck over 10th for career - good;
sun lord 10th for career over scorpio 12th for foreign lands;

ketu pisces 4th hyper-sensitive, keen spiritual orientations;
maternal grandparents orientation.
detachment from mother-motherland. pain in heart-lungs-feet etc

hope inputs enable reflect further, could share pointwise feedbacks/curious,

wishing well,


kshantaram

 

[LyP]

mars-venus sag asc, artistic aptitudes, mere attractions;
currently sat transit mars-venus restricting; sat sag philosophical-just;

natal sat aries 5th debilated aptitude for social work;
lord mars over asc, debilation cancelled, gradual pace of growth in luck-education-position etc.
sat elevated aspect over libra 11th for gains, and cap 2nd for finances

asc lord jup over mystic acq 3rd,
good for advisory-teaching-reformist-counselling roles;

jup transit libra 11th opp sat aries, misjudgments and missed opportunities
in matters of income-gains-friendships-education-romance etc

sun-mer scorpio 12th, research-occult-investigative aptitudes; forensic medicine, suspicious, sentimental;

moon-rahu virgo 10th, acting skills; public appeal; foreign assignments;
rise-fall, calls for ancestor worship;
wanting to rise fast in life; ambitions of paternal grandparents;

moon lord 9th for luck over 10th for career - good;
sun lord 10th for career over scorpio 12th for foreign lands;

ketu pisces 4th hyper-sensitive, keen spiritual orientations;
maternal grandparents orientation.
detachment from mother-motherland. pain in heart-lungs-feet etc

hope inputs enable reflect further, could share pointwise feedbacks/curious,

wishing well,


kshantaram

thank you for the feedbacks c:

 

[kshantaram]

appreciate prompt ack.

any statements true/untrue, meaningful, to consider;
your thoughts and reflections on the reading-inputs and usefulness.


wishing well/kshantaram