I'm so young, but already I have so many dreams and ambitions, but no matter how hard I try, I come so close to certain goals, which ultimately fail...
I have been there, dear Ura... Saturn in the 10th, in Gemini
...How can I reach my dreams with THAT placement?
I also wonder that, still, even at my age.
Have worked really hard for some projects, just to see some of them fail at the last moment. Some of them, well, maybe fate, karma, etc, also envy from shady people, but others, I later realized had some unstable foundations, so it was a matter of time to see them fall.
School life for me: I loved academics, but was somewhat lonely among my classmates. VERY SHY. Few friends. Graduation for me was like the greatest step, a great reward, college life was the best time of my life... until the final year (broke up with boyfriend at the time, struggling with money problems, had to move suddenly from were I lived, injustice from landlady, tears and drama). Still, I completed my Bachelor's degree, and, after a while, found a great work in my field of study.
To sum it up, it has been like a LOT of work, to finally get at least something of what I wanted, to later loose some of it and start again or change directions.
One of the things I most appreciated: the very few friends that at the worst of times, stood by me and helped. For me, the greatest gift God could have sent.
I have all my life been seen as very responsible person, people trust or at least take notice of what I say. Love the written word, but very shy when speaking in public, felt dumb or at least very preoccupied with what or how I communicate. Do not like my voice that much. Even with all that, have had the opportunity to be in front of a microphone, go figure!
I have had friends way older than my age since I was a kid.
I am very spiritual/religious also.
Physically, I resemble more my father.
Waited long time to finally get married and had kids.
Looking back, I wished I have had someone who guided me better to discover and trusted EARLIER myself and my talents, more support and less criticism and shame.
@Urawakai
I have Saturn in the 10th house, but my Saturn is in Sagittarius. It's not that bad...
And that's what a Saturn in Sagittarius would say!
... Have you noticed friendships start/end suddenly?...
Yes. I think that when they go, it is because the lesson with that person ended, the purposed of them in my life. That is one of the reasons also I am sometimes a little detached, not because I do not love that person in my life, but because I know that one way or another some day they may leave and well, that hurts. Sometimes I know the person, have a great time etc, only to later discover their "bad side" (sometimes it is because of a problem or just some character traits that I do not like). But then again, I know that everybody has a shadow, that is just people being what they are, so I have learned to not let it affect me (maybe here, my Moon in Aquarius at work too
).
To you, Ura.. what can I say? Yes, it is a ton of work, but even with the disapointments, the great memories, adventures and THE LEARNING and UNDERSTANDING of oneself along the way, are worth it.