Girl in panic..

[MinhaLindemann]

Ok, not exactly in panic, but worried about my future.

Before I start, sorry for my English..I'm not good at it. I used to learn English in school, but nothing more.

I am new at this forum. In my country we have some. It is good, but nothing special.

I am in some kind of relationship with a divorced man, who has two children. We met at work, and in January 2015. it all begins. At that moment he was married. He divorced two months after. There is a lot of sexual attraction between us. I tried to leave..in fact, in some moments I didn't feel anything about him, but somehow, he is always near me, and something connect us.

To mention, I have no luck in love, unfortunately. All failures.

Here is are synastry chart, my natal chart, and also his natal chart.

Is there any help for me. What should I do about him?

Thanks. Kiss.

 

[jkxx74]

ML,

to begin that synastry chart looks pretty potent - the venus-mars-venus-mars double conjunction is probably what's causing most of the trouble and excitement for you with sun square uranus being responsible for the on-off nature of the relationship. You also get moon conjunct jupiter (I have this with someone as well) which is a mighty cheerful aspect and then the AC-MC deal going on between the two charts. You could even count Sun-Saturn which while inexact can act to keep the relationship going no matter what. And since you're also getting pluto square moon with you being the pluto this suggests you're the one wanting to keep things going and it's hard to let go of emotions aroused by this connection.

Could you combine the two charts into a composite chart and post that too through astro.com? That can reveal more about the patterns behind the 'drive' in your connection.

I'm going to guess that because of the heavy Venus-Mars and Moon-Pluto involvement this gets you both stirred very strongly and maybe even feels like a guilty pleasure to both of you, depending on your circumstances.

 

[katydid]

In looking at your natal chart, I can see how you might think that relationships are difficult. I think you said they were all failures. So we might need to look at what you need to know about YOUR chart before we look to the synastry.

You have the Sun and the Moon, the 2 lights, together in Cancer. That is a whole lot of EMOTION. It might be hard for others to keep up with you emotionally or to understand your emotional reactions and behaviors. Not everyone is as sensitive or reactive as you might be at times. Then you have the Capricorn Ascendant and placements which oppose the Cancer energy. So you might end up trying to hold back emotionally and may not clearly communicate what is going on with you. Your partner may ask 'what is wrong?' --and you say ' NOTHING.' Which is probably not true...lol

So your partner may not understand what is happening or why you are upset or angry or defensive.

This man has the Sun in Libra, so that can be a good balance for you. He wants to try and get along and understand the relationship. But he is AIR, so he cannot fully comprehend the emotional reactions that sometimes overwhelm the relationship.

Your Mars/Venus and his Mars/Venus are conjunct. That is powerfully sexual and intense chemistry and intimacy. So it might override some of the issues with your squares between your Cancer/Capricorn and his Libra .

 

[katydid]

Something interesting in your 'element' tables, between you two.

You only have one planet in AIR---which is SATURN.


He only has one planet in WATER---which is SATURN.


Saturn is where we need to learn a lesson.So you may be teaching him to understand emotions and deep feelings, and he is teaching you balance and rational behaviors and responses.

 

[Snakechammah]

Holy chicken nugget! I am so envious of your synastry chart!

I'm a firm believer of angles conjunction and you have such beautiful AC/MC, IC/DC connection. And you also have the double whammy Venus/Mars conjunction. Great house placements too - 8th House, 7th House, 4th House, 5th House, all activated... and you have some Saturn magic going on too, for commitment.

What the heck. Solve your problems and get married already!

Some people wait a lifetime to get such good synastry.... and you have it.

 

[MinhaLindemann]

OMG.. Thank you for such a good comments. Again, sorry for my English.

BTW, Happy New Year everyone. Kisses, hugs and greetings. :* <3

Ok, jkxx74 , I will be post composite chart just for a sec.

katydid , I am so confuse about my self..all the time. There is one thing that Cancer is going to say, and the other what Capricorn wants. In my mind is the constant chaos. I am hard to understand. How the moon moves, I also change my mood. In one day I can be super happy, in a minute there is opposite mood. I am totally aggressive, sad... In relationship I don't know what do I want. It's easier when I'm alone. I quickly breaking up. It's hard for me to adapt to. But I want family, I want kids.. But I don't know how. Or maybe I didn't find someone who will inspire me.

This guy has qualities that I love. I think we could be great business partners. I see myself next to him in business. We are ambitious, hard workers..
He has the charm to swipe, and I have the strength to finish something. Good combination in our jobs. I am head of the construction sites, and he works at the store for the purchase of building materials. If you are understand me. We could have our company, our production.

Do not know. Also, he has a bad side. He is not faithful. Also he was a gambler. There is too much energy in him and he does not know how to control it.

I don't which one is right, but here is composite chart.

 

[jkxx74]

omg... that composite - sun conjunct venus/mars/mercury on the DC... would just say go for it right now -

I agree with katy's points so that seems to speak to the overall meaning and purpose of your relationship but if you can keep things going this is definitely worth it with these aspects.

Edit: he does seem to have venus square jupiter (along with mars) so that could be bringing on the flirting/gambling tendencies - still with composite stellium this very likely feels as significant for him as it does for you.

 

[MinhaLindemann]

Do you know how it looks "go for it" for me? Doing nothing. Hahaha. I am stupid for that kind of stuff. At work I am going for it all the time. I'm a fighter. But in love.. God.. I'm running away. Hahaha.
In my previous relationship, I always made a scene... I do not like this, I do not like that.. We should brake up..I can not bother about it..But in this situation, it's different. I don't rush things, I don't make problems where there is no problem. Maybe because of what katydid sad. That stuff with Saturn and lesson.
So, this is how I do. I don't know better. I'm so Capricorn in love. Cold, distant.. Oh... He is patient about me. He can see my mood, or my attitude.. In those situation he will let me to charge my battery pretending like everything is okay. After few days he will call again. And everything seems fine. He wants to see me. I can not say no even in situation when I don't want to go with him. Something always pushed me to go out with him. Maybe because I like adventure with him. Every out meeting is like an adventure. Different place, different city.. There is no problem for him to come and get me even there is kilometers between us. He works in one town, me in another.. and we are going to have day or night in some totally different place.. the third one. oh, sex is great. We gonna do everything for it. Hahaha.
But I don't know how to catch him for something more seriously. That's not my stile. And also he has small children. He is divorced only a few months.
It was like destiny. I thought, God, why he is married. He is perfect. And after few days he told me he wants divorce. Shock. Ok, is that some Gods plan?

Someone in my natal chart, when I asked about future partner.. said, that in time of our meeting, he will be in relationship. We gonna have some kind of relationship with pauses.. And somehow it's similar. There is pauses. Because of me and my periods, obviously.
And in his chart, his next love will be a person who is weird in positive way, a different person, unique. And she gonna be his choice because of gooooood sex. Hahaha. I was like, is that me???? I'm so unusual person. So unique. Everyone can confirm that.

Ok, I'm too boring.

 

[sibylline]

I saw this thread earlier and thought his chart looked like my ex's chart. They were born close together and Ascendants are ~10 degrees apart so the planets' houses are similar as well.

Now that you have provided more information I see that these similarities have resulted in remarkably similar life paths and personalities. Even the circumstances of your meeting is similar. It's pretty amazing, since they have different Sun, Moon, and Ascendants, but that doesn't appear to have changed much except that my ex is more grounded and less risk-tasking due to the Earth Sun and Ascendant.

Considering that as well as his chart and what you have said about him, I would have to say no, don't bother with him. Unless you're just looking for fun and not something serious. The thing about synastry, etc is that they are only as good as the natal. If the natal suggests real difficulties to work through in relationships, as his does, the best synastry in the world is not going to negate that. IME. Your own chart shows a willful, excitement-seeking, changeable nature so maybe something temporary and distant is for you. If you're looking for a steady, trusting relationship, you already know that he is unfaithful, has issues with gambling, flirting, etc so why bother?

 

[ashriia]

If you're looking for a steady, trusting relationship, you already know that he is unfaithful, has issues with gambling, flirting, etc so why bother?

He has a good chart for gambling though, lucky b*stard.

I think they are quite compatible actually. He provides her with the thrill of adventure and the instability that uranus opposite sun & moon would find desirable in a partner. A venus in virgo like OP also likes to mother/fix the partner. He has aries rising, with moon and venus in leo in the 5th, probably loves being fussed over. Seems like a good pair IMO, for however long it lasts.

 

[sibylline]

He has a good chart for gambling though, lucky b*stard.

I think they are quite compatible actually. He provides her with the thrill of adventure and the instability that uranus opposite sun & moon would find desirable in a partner. A venus in virgo like OP also likes to mother/fix the partner. He has aries rising, with moon and venus in leo in the 5th, probably loves being fussed over. Seems like a good pair IMO, for however long it lasts.

Hmmm, his 5th house is looking good. The squares to Uranus in the 8th could pull a fast one on him though. Lol.

I think they're an okay match also --I don't know about the lack of water in his chart for a 7th house double Cancer-- but not if she's looking for anything really serious. It wasn't clear from her posts if she had made up her mind about that or not; it's like she is going back and forth (which should be expected from her 7th hse Cancer Sun opposite 1st house Uranus/Neptune).

 

[MinhaLindemann]

ashriia, I don't know how much lucky is he.. Only what I know is that he nothing gained. Only losses.

Sibullyine why bother? Well.. the truth is, I don't love him. Only sympathy, quite strong. Why bother? Because I found myself with him. At the moment I was like.. No, this is not me.. I could not recognize myself.. But at the other moment.. I realize that this is me. A free spirit. Full of energy. And his energy...he has energy like me. You know.. I am not so diffrent. I am a hazard too. If I met him in period when he was a gambler, pretty sure I would gamble with him. Hahaha. And also I'm not a saint, so neither he. Maybe he suits me. I don't know. It's just his energy, his ability for work.. Yes, I can find a man who is better than him. Who is faithfull, who is good.. And I had someone like that.. But no.. I need him to be strong in bussines, dominant, ready for fun and adventure..someone who wants to try, who is not affraid of changes, of doing something what mayube shouldn't. You don't know unless you try. I need someone alive.

But yes, still don't have some things I want and I also like. And just like my sign and ascendant are, opposite.. so are my decisiones. In one hand, he is what I need, in the other he is not. There is no middle... And that's me. A person with no middle. It's black or white. It's good or it's not, etc.

 

[muchacho]

Ok, not exactly in panic, but worried about my future.

Before I start, sorry for my English..I'm not good at it. I used to learn English in school, but nothing more.

I am new at this forum. In my country we have some. It is good, but nothing special.

I am in some kind of relationship with a divorced man, who has two children. We met at work, and in January 2015. it all begins. At that moment he was married. He divorced two months after. There is a lot of sexual attraction between us. I tried to leave..in fact, in some moments I didn't feel anything about him, but somehow, he is always near me, and something connect us.

To mention, I have no luck in love, unfortunately. All failures.

Here is are synastry chart, my natal chart, and also his natal chart.

Is there any help for me. What should I do about him?




Thanks. Kiss.

Looking at the synastry and using whole sign houses, he triggers your 4th (home), 8th (fear, trauma) and 10th (career). You trigger his 4th and 10th. So there's definitely a deep connection there and the relationship could be very beneficial for both of you. By triggering your 4th and 8th he can help you with healing past emotional trauma (8th) and boost your sense of belonging (4th). By triggering your 10th (career) he may be beneficial in terms of getting ahead at work or in finding your true purpose. However, the 4th and 8th are also potentially troublesome houses.

Usually, when the 4th house is triggered, people feel like settling down and having a family.

 

[Abby83]

Ummm... what about the kids!!!!

 

[MinhaLindemann]

Ummm... what about the kids!!!!

His kids, or the future ones? I don't have problem with that. To mention, I always tell him (when kids are at his home) to stay with them. We gonna see next time. There is no problem for me. Because I know what priority is. Like my job is to me right now. If I am busy there is no one and nothing that can stop me at that. Everything after I am finished. I don't feel good when he is with me, and the kids are calling him to come back home. So sad. I like children. A also want to be mum. And there is nothing more important than children. I understand that. So, no big deal. Right now. My mum is married for my father who had a marriage before, and one child from that marriage. She's ok with that. For all this years. She doesn't care for his first wife. Like she doesn't exist. And my half-sister treats like her own.

Muchacho , thanks for such a lovely analysis. Kiss.

 

[Abby83]

His kids, or the future ones? I don't have problem with that. To mention, I always tell him (when kids are at his home) to stay with them. We gonna see next time. There is no problem for me. Because I know what priority is. Like my job is to me right now. If I am busy there is no one and nothing that can stop me at that. Everything after I am finished. I don't feel good when he is with me, and the kids are calling him to come back home. So sad. I like children. A also want to be mum. And there is nothing more important than children. I understand that. So, no big deal. Right now. My mum is married for my father who had a marriage before, and one child from that marriage. She's ok with that. For all this years. She doesn't care for his first wife. Like she doesn't exist. And my half-sister treats like her own.

Muchacho , thanks for such a lovely analysis. Kiss.

That's good that you like kids and think they are important, but anything can change. The synastry sun square your Uranus, Neptune, asc, north node 1st house kinda bothers me a tad.