At turning point -- your insights needed

libradragon

Active member
Things have come to a head with the cap moon boyfriend. To go forward or not? :34:

He says the most important thing is that we're able to be happy, and I agree, though we both understand nowhere is a bed of roses. Lately I've been really unhappy -- He proposed 6 months ago and for about a week I was thrilled and feeling so much more secure. Then I noticed he wasn't telling his family, friends, or anyone about it. So i've been increasingly insecure about if he is serious about this, and increasingly unhappy. And he's unhappy with my unhappiness. It has been a downward cycle.

My sense is this relationship is what we make it. With dedication and a commitment, it can be lovely. Without that, it dissolves to nothing.

Really could use feedback on what you do -- and don't -- see in our synastry charts. I'm definitely willing to pay for a good in-depth analysis, so if you have any favorites of people who give great readings, could you let me know (if that's not against board policy)?

synastrywithasteroids.gif

Hi chart is inside.
Trine ASC
Trine Merc
My sun sq his moon, his sun sq my moon
My DC conj his north node
His DC conjunct my sun-moon midpoint AND lilith (both 7th house)
His juno conj my mars

And all the rest...

Thanks --
 
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EJ53

Banned
Hi LD,

I don't think the synastry is the issue here. You both have Sun and Mercury in 12th hiouse - creating inner insecurity about your attractiveness to others, which is an individual chart issue.

My guess is he will be delighted if you announce the engagement to his family, friends and the world generally. That way, he (and everyone else) knows how pleased you are about it - boosting his self-confidence enormously.

But, don't go paying anyone for astrological readings when this site is excellent at teaching you how to do them yourself - and it's more interesting.

EJ:)
 

libradragon

Active member
"But, but, but," I can hear myself saying, "he's the man, he's 'supposed to' do that himself!" Maybe that's my insecurities from the 12th-house Sun talking, eh?

Something he said the other day makes it clear he no longer considers himself engaged, or if he does it's no sooner than in a few years! I'm so overwhelmed by emotions right now, not knowing what's happening or where we're going, uncertain how much energy to put into this to try to patch things up again. I'm in tears half the time and know he doesn't want to know about it.

In some ways it seems so right and destined. In some ways it's so incredibly vague. It some ways it seems so impossible.

Yes, I'd lots rather have input from the board and learn these things for myself. At this point i'm open to more information and insights wherever they come from.
 

Ebenia

Well-known member
I always say this, but TALK to your boyfriend. You will NEVER make it if you don't learn to talk about these things to him straight on. Trust yourself. Ask how he feels, why he does that, and what are you feeling about it - and do this with caution, no raising voices or accusations. Just talk with love. It will all work out if it should.

Good luck to you. :)
 

libradragon

Active member
I always say this, but TALK to your boyfriend. You will NEVER make it if you don't learn to talk about these things to him straight on.
We do talk, quite a lot, but we just seem to go around in circles.

He knows I'm feeling in limbo, needing more stability in our relationship. He's not prepared to act in the ways we can see that would provide that.

I know he feels pressured when I ask him about our future together, as he "doesn't know" and "needs more time". I'm not prepared to live on a maybe.

He needs to be feeling we are happy together. I'm having a hard time showing a lot of happiness when I feel insecure about if he is committed.

I'm turning to astrology to try to uncover anything that might help here. But yes, we do talk, all the time.

On the midpoint chart, i did that, but I don't see anything overly helpful, except to see that Saturn is in the 7th. We already knew the relationship takes a lot of work! Here it is...
midpoints.gif
 

cassanra

Well-known member
saturn in the 7th can also mean committment however mars, uranus and pluto together in the first can indicate some powerful feelings and maybe some egos in there too:) The mercury, venus and sun in the 12th house again emphasizes that there are some things that might be hidden, but having them conjunct can be a good thing just need to learn to get over egos and not to hide anything. Jupiter sextile merc will bring luck through communication..oaky so you do have some issues with saturn opposite mars maybe putting a damper on things but that may be a good thing with all those energies...Jupiter is in the 11th house...maybe there is so much passion there and the jupiter focus with a lot of trines means ...lets try to be friends too ...the neptune squares may indicate that you may not be seeing things as they really are for good or bad....too many expectations, too many illusions etc, too much rose colored :) just some thoughts....Cassandra
 

Morghana Stellara

Well-known member
Check out the composite fixed grand cross!

These are never easy to deal with. LOL! I should know! My partner and I have one in our composite as well. The relationship will usually "stick" so to speak, but not without tremendous growth from both parties. It means learning to compromise. It means there will be latent insecurities brought to the surface, especially with a packed 12th house! It's a relationship that can inspire a lot of growth and change if the energy is directed in the best way possible, but it will never be peaceful, nor easy.

As a Libra, I can't imagine you liking that sort of thing. I'm an Aries, and conflict seems to be a way of life. lol :p

I will post more later. I'd like to take a look at the progressed composite.
 

libradragon

Active member
It's a relationship that can inspire a lot of growth and change if the energy is directed in the best way possible, but it will never be peaceful, nor easy.
Yes, that's it exactly. TREMENDOUS growth when we can channel that conflict energy into helpful channels (meditation, learning better communication, etc), but it's not peaceful or easy. We're both wondering if the lack of peace and ease can possibly be tolerable to either of us in the long term.

He's got his Mars in Libra and really seems to enjoy verbal debate. I tend to clam up and shut down, go meditate to cool down and sort things out, then come back and try talking again. It also can take a LOT of time!

Would be really interested in reading more about your sense of all this, particularly as you've a similar energy in your synastry chart.
 
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