Focus lost, disinterested in everything, even when communicating I have to ask twice as my mind is lost somewhere
I wasn't like this at all in my childhood.. Always active and aware and one of the intelligent kid
I want my old self back.. Please help
I'm answering because I want to be helpful, but the most helpful thing I can think to say is that it could be many things, and you probably need to investigate that closely in your own life. But here's the good news: the very process of investigating why you're always stuck in your subconscious is a process of becoming more conscious about yourself! By starting this thread you're already taking an initial step!
Asking this question on an astrology website suggests you're wondering if this is something inherent about your character that a chart can easily show. And that might be it. Or it might be environmental factors or the path your life has gone down ( Though it might be that really good astrologers -not me - can. See that. In the chart as well). As an educator, I tend to think in general the best thing a person can do to live a more conscious life is just stay on the education road - self-education if not school. Exactly what education is is becoming consciously aware of what's going on. I don't mean to imply anything by this next comment - just the next thought in my stream of consciousness - but the philosophy behanind psychotherapy is that it's supposed to be a method of bringing the unconscious into the conscious mind, thereby gaining greater control over it. Therapy is often stigmatized in modern cultures but it can be a really useful tool for becoming more consciously aware of yourself, how your mind reacts to the world, etc.
Or there could be something in your environment. Certainly in the 21st century this is a massive, invisible problem. All sorts of components run through the environment today the human body never had to confront, and they do strange things to us, often invisibly and in undetected way.
Or it could be a lack of sleep. I'm not kidding. A good sleep cycle is as crucial to healthy human functioning as eating food. But again, the 21 century, we tend to (be forced to) forget/not care about that. Are you sleeping well enough?
You must realize that you have gained the most important and strategic point in this personal battle, dear! You are still aware or have now become aware that something is amiss and that you must do something about it. So, BRAVO! That first and crucial step and thought you must reinforce and then begin seeking help as opposed to letting it nag you and without any sustained action from your side or at the behest of your loved ones there is a risk of this thought becoming numb and weaker over time. Seeking help can begin with sharing with a caring relative or friend or teachers or priest depending on your religion etc. A real network as opposed to solely relying on 'NET-help' is crucial for your regaining total control of the emotions that have created this sense of personal vacuum.
Birch Dragon, I loved your sharing from the soul and plane of wisdom from which you *spoke* and shared, caringly!
I am certain that one or more astrologers would be able to give you meaningful and then hopefully and most importantly, you would begin acting upon what has been shared by me and Birch Dragon!