Defense mechanisms. I have had similar feelings. I do have Algol on the descendant, and Zosma on the MC, and they contact other entities. Anger lessened, and charity work began.
I can't change the past, but I can change my future.
My Mother nears her end. She tries to make amends, but she still wants to try to control me. That ship passed, so very long ago.
May she be at peace, for now, I am.
Charity work has been an important part of my life, and my healing.
Que Sera
EXTREMELY important too! You did good Opal
Fixed stars like Zosma are simply vibrations that the soul has decided to take on in this lifetime if it's in the natal chart - but vibrations can cause (impel ) us to take wrong turns too.
People think that fate and destiny, kismet are the same but they are not. One can change his or her destiny, if not one's fate. We are fated to be born with natal charts (if human or animal), full of vibrations we earned from past lifetimes or alternate ones we are now working on. Because of this we see so much harm in the charts for people. They don't understand it can be changed, if not in this lifetime, then for eternity imo.
I started a post, with various saved charts having Zosma when born, and bang, along comes Tr Uranus, Tr Mars or what not, triggers tragedies.
From this quote (you have the book) see pg. below -
all of these charts I started the post for, crashed on me, (my stupid computer issues), is Mercury rx?
YEP !!
Too much work to repeat, but had posted the natal info & transits for:
1) a baby born 2 weeks premature, whose mom was shot as well as the baby
born with Ceres cj. Zosma, tr Mars triggered this place (along with other planets), and the baby died too. Baby's Moon was 0-1 Cancer.
2) Abu-al Zaqwari - 2006 in Iraq when
Tr Uranus opposed Zosma, and tr Uranus was 9 Pisces (opposition place) took him down via his natal Mars was 10 deg. Virgo.
3) a woman astrologer has her n. Moon 11 Virgo when Tr Uranus in 2009, triggered the planet with the cj. of the fixed star,
in opposition; and at the same time
, Tr Ceres rx triggered the Moon, and she lost her son through a tragic snow accident.
Zosma Moon TR Ceres conj. Moon over 8th House of Death (Son died in ski accident)
Moon rules 7th of marriages, and her husband (11Virgo Moon) dies young
4) a young man born with asteroid
Karma 09 Virgo commits suicide when tr Ceres in 2009 was retrograde, and triggered this place opposed to Tr Uranus, and he left this plane.
I always have hundreds of backup charts in my research available to me, (not easy to access during Mercury rx of course), because I want to prove to myself, these vibrations harm for whichever more noteworthy fixed stars we speak of or I write about.
As for the above examples: check out your Robson Fixed Star book under this star....(I lost the post I made regarding Elsbeth Ebertin pointing to suicides, Mars like actions, greater harm, etc.
However, I just put my hands on the older book "Fixed Stars and their Interpretation by Ebertin-Hoffman pg. 54 and check out Alioth too (On the Great Bear's Tail)
this is what I had from the Robson book- but I found it in her book now but
not as long a quote:
"Quite a distance from the Ecliptic, BUT, if felt, will make an impact, as it's Mars-like and of a destructive kind,.
Associated with suicidal thoughts (*see above suicide), joined with the Moon (*see above baby) possible danger through pregnancy and delivery. (baby 2 weeks premature) but both mom & baby shot/died.
also: Potential for: bad fortune within the family circle; fiascos -
"