A Scorpio rising who isn't sexy

I've been studying my own chart but some of the interpretations don't seem like me at all. I wonder if anyone else could help shed some light.

Scorpio Rising: I'm not sexy in the least and am really unattractive looking
Afflicted Neptune in the first house: Probably one of the reasons I turned out ugly, but I don't have any drug or alcohol problems, though I do suffer from mental illness. I've tried to kill myself multiple times, but it never seemed to work. Both parents were unhappy, abusive Capricorns. Father had his Saturn conjunct my Moon and Mother had her Saturn conjunct my Sun. (I've gone no contact with both of them and am stable now on meds thanks)
Leo moon in the 10th house: I am not like a stereotypical Leo Moon at all. I hate attention and drama.
Venus and Mars conjunct in the 8th house: again, I'm not sexy.
Jupiter in the second house: I am poor.
Sun in the 7th house: I am socially awkward and avoid people.
Uranus and Pluto in the 11th house: I don't have weird or controlling friends.


Here's my chart:
May 19, 1972
6:50 PM PDT
Novato, California, USA
122W34'07
38N06'27
 

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Osamenor

Staff member
None of the interpretations you quote are necessarily true. They're just cookbook astrology. Grossly oversimplified and often don't apply.

Scorpio Rising: I'm not sexy in the least and am really unattractive looking

Sexiness is in the eye of the beholder. How do you know you're not sexy? What makes you think you're ugly?
Afflicted Neptune in the first house: Probably one of the reasons I turned out ugly, but I don't have any drug or alcohol problems, though I do suffer from mental illness.

Neptune in the first could also give you wonderful creativity and intuitiveness, which would shine in your personality. Maybe have to be coaxed out of hiding a bit, since your Neptune is retrograde, but certainly present. Sagittarius is a very creative sign, too. Is the mental illness you suffer from bipolar disorder, by any chance? That would fit very well with that kind of Neptune/Sag picture. (Now I'm wondering if the Neptune in Sagittarius generation has more bipolars in it than others!)
Leo moon in the 10th house: I am not like a stereotypical Leo Moon at all. I hate attention and drama.
Not all Leos (solar, lunar, or anything else) like attention. Leo is like a cat. Some cats will approach anyone and demand to be petted. Others are very shy. But even shy cats usually like getting petted by one or two particular people. Similarly, Leo has an especially strong need for love, but not always adoring crowds. It can be as simple as one person saying I love you.

Even a tenth house Leo moon might not like attention or drama very much. If you're a "shy cat" kind of Leo moon, being in the spotlight is challenging for you, but you probably find yourself thrust into it anyway from time to time, at least in small ways. And you're probably someone people tend to remember. Leo people tend to take up space, unconsciously, and Scorpio people are typically memorable. Not always thought of as sexy--that's a misinterpretation--but memorable, which is sometimes interpreted as sexy.
Venus and Mars conjunct in the 8th house: again, I'm not sexy.
The eighth house doesn't have much to do with how you appear to others. It's one of the hidden houses. Venus and Mars in that house might give you a strong sex drive, or especially strong desire for intimacy--deep, unpretentious intimacy, that is. There are also many other ways those placements could manifest. Since you have them in Cancer, you might have an especially strong and protective nurturing instinct, or an especially strong desire to be nurtured. You probably operate from a deeply intuitive place when it comes to love, emotions, and interactions with others.
Jupiter in the second house: I am poor.
One out of every twelve people have Jupiter in the second house, and they run the gamut from 1%ers to beggars. Being poor is a circumstance, and it might change through your life. Perceiving yourself as poor, however, might be related to your Jupiter placement. Second house is all about personal security. Money is included in it because money spells material security, but it also means food, and emotional security, and body image, and health, and everything else you could think of that relates to security and personal values.

Jupiter is ordinarily very expansive and generous. Capricorn is ambitious and frugal and has a tendency to feel lacking. When Jupiter is in Capricorn, its expansiveness runs into Capricorn's barriers and tends to get pressed into service of Capricorn's sense of lack and desire for more.

You perceive yourself as poor (maybe you are; I don't know what your financial situation is; but plenty of people call themselves poor when they really are not), and you perceive yourself as ugly. Those are second house issues. Magnified by Jupiter and depressed by Capricorn.
Sun in the 7th house: I am socially awkward and avoid people.
You also have Saturn in the seventh house. That sometimes manifests as a loner tendency. Extreme loner tendency is social awkwardness and avoiding people.

Sun in the seventh house doesn't mean you're necessarily a gregarious person, it means that personal relationships are a key growth area for you, and key growth areas usually include noticeable conflict. Being socially awkward and avoiding people is one of those possible conflicts. Plus, Taurus can be very much a loner.

Uranus and Pluto in the 11th house: I don't have weird or controlling friends.

The way you described yourself in the rest of your post, it sounds like you don't have any friends. If you do in fact have friends, being who you are, it's likely that there's something unusual about them. That doesn't necessarily mean they're weird, but they're probably people who tend to think out of the box and do whatever makes sense to them even if it's unconventional. Uranus in Libra, though, suggests some harmoniousness... very nice people who may be somewhat oddball but still get along well with others. And Pluto isn't always controlling. It has many other meanings....

Since your ascendant is Scorpio, Pluto is your chart ruler, along with Mars. Eleventh house doesn't actually mean friends in the modern sense of the word, people you like and have personal relationships with. Rather, it's the House of Friends in the archaic sense: people you associate with but don't necessarily have close personal relationships with. In modern English, that would more accurately be called associates.

If you have a mental illness, you've probably been closely associated with people who are also mentally ill. That, too, can be reflected by Pluto, as well as Uranus. Where Uranus is unconventionality, Pluto is the Underworld, hidden things, unacknowledged things... exactly what mental illness is in our society. Having your chart ruler in the eleventh house makes your associates another of the key growth areas for you. Really, relationships with others, and collaboration with others, is a key theme of your chart.
 
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Thanks for the analysis, it's very thought provoking.

Re: the ugliness, I know by the disgusted reactions of people who see me that I'm ugly. I'm not imagining things, even though people have looked at my chart before and said, "Neptune in the first house? You're delusional."

Saturn in the seventh house is interesting but since it's within 5 degrees of the 8th house cusp I read it as being in the 8th house. Cookbook interpretations of Saturn in the 8th do seem pretty accurate in describing me.
 

Love2Know

Well-known member
Thanks for the analysis, it's very thought provoking.

Re: the ugliness, I know by the disgusted reactions of people who see me that I'm ugly. I'm not imagining things, even though people have looked at my chart before and said, "Neptune in the first house? You're delusional."

Saturn in the seventh house is interesting but since it's within 5 degrees of the 8th house cusp I read it as being in the 8th house. Cookbook interpretations of Saturn in the 8th do seem pretty accurate in describing me.

Your saturn can become a gift. If you change your attitude and live with self love you will blossom. Leo moon must have.. self pride.. :) I have venus conjunct asc 1st I was always made fun of for being ugly or fat as a kid or as a young adult I remember this model girl saying to my mom...oh does she have trouble getting a bf.... I was practically engaged rofl and had sexy *** boyfriends.. She had trouble keeping a bf cuz she was a coked up balemic wreck. I just really love cake and cuddling. No amount of good genic combinations can make that less of a downer to be around..so yeah astrology is personal. Good luck! Ps also leo rising moon and I can go hide as soon as people come over. I like/need/flourish and go crazy without me time. I want to look right and feel right before facing others.
 
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Osamenor

Staff member
Re: the ugliness, I know by the disgusted reactions of people who see me that I'm ugly. I'm not imagining things, even though people have looked at my chart before and said, "Neptune in the first house? You're delusional."

I don't see anything in your chart that would suggest you disgust people. Maybe I'm missing something--that might be one of the more obscure parts of astrology that I haven't learned yet--but it doesn't correlate with what I'm seeing there. I do see placements that might give you a tendency to perceive yourself harshly. Unless you have a facial deformity?

Neptune placements can't make anyone delusional. Being delusional is a state, not an innate personality trait. Some people are especially susceptible to delusions, and Neptune placements might have something to do with that, but they wouldn't make you delusional throughout your life.

I do see something very interesting about your chart: you have an unusually high number of placements in the last degrees of their signs. Your sun is at 29 degrees Taurus, your moon at 29 degrees Leo, and your Pluto at 29 degrees Virgo. Having anything in that last degree of a sign brings a sense of indecision and urgency and may blur the lines in your sense of self. The sun, the moon, and the chart ruler are especially powerful--and here you are with all three of those in the last degrees!

Discussion on 29 degree placements here: http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=80540&highlight=29th+degree+support+group
 
I don't have a deformity per se, just an asymmetrical, oddly proportioned face.

I did notice the number of planets in the 29th degree. I wasn't sure of the significance. Thanks for the link.
 

Bradders

Well-known member
Awww! How could you call yourself ugly? *hugs* Thats not a nice way to think of yourself!

Anyway, I'd say you shouldn't compare yourself to other people, especially how they are apparance wise! You are unique!

Otherwise, just treat your body well! You sound if you don't mind me saying quite self conscious, which I'm sure comes from your unloving neglectful parenting! I'm sorry!

*hugs and squeezes tight*

I hope you will realize it's how beautiful we are internally! Also I'd never call yourself ugly!

Toodles!

~ Brad
 

Osamenor

Staff member
On chart interpretation and appearance, I still don't see any indicators that you're ugly, but this could be another manifestation of Scorpio rising. Scorpio's indicators include archetypes--mythological figures, the collective unconscious, and people's deep desires and fears. Sexiness is one of those archetypes, tied in with deep desire... and so is ugliness. We see it in folklore again and again. Snow White and the witch. Sir Gawain and the loathesome hag. The Phantom of the Opera. Frankenstein.

A Scorpio ascendant gives you the ability to appeal to people on a deep archetypal level, but it doesn't tell you which archetype to manifest or which sense you'll appeal to. Beauty, or the beast? Attraction or revulsion? Seductive Dracula, or Dracula when he's extended his fangs and gotten his mouth all bloody?

Thinking of Frankenstein made me go back and do a little reading. If you've ever read the original story, Frankenstein's monster is, in essence, an unloved, rejected child. That sounds exactly like the story you've related of your own upbringing. It also matches Mary Shelley's upbringing: she grew up emotionally neglected and often excluded from the family by her stepmother and half siblings, and her father was of no help, either. And, interestingly, she also had Pluto in the last degree of its sign in her birth chart! And conjunct her midheaven, making it an obvious part of her personality.
 
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wilsontc

Staff member
back to astrology

All,

Please get back to giving astrological advice. If you do not have astrological advice to give, please do not post to this thread.

Back on subject,

Tim
 

Osamenor

Staff member
I wrote an astrological post, and it was deleted along with the off topic ones. Let's see if I can recreate it adequately.

[restored the on-topic post - Moderator]

Deleted recreated post so as not to be redundant - Osamenor
 
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cspencer

Banned
Scorpio Rising: I'm not sexy in the least and am really unattractive looking

Your ascendant is in the term of Mars, and then you have Mercury in opposition to your ascendant.

Afflicted Neptune in the first house: Probably one of the reasons I turned out ugly, but I don't have any drug or alcohol problems,...

Neptune is a non-event, so you can ignore it.

... though I do suffer from mental illness.

That is most likely Cancer Venus conjunct Mars and both ruling the 6th/12th Places.

Jupiter in the second house: I am poor.

No, you are poor because Jupiter rules the 2nd Place, but is actually in Capricorn in the 3rd Place in aversion to the 2nd Place, not to mention Jupiter is in fall in Capricorn.

You'll just have to get used to not having a lot of money.

Sun in the 7th house: I am socially awkward and avoid people.

That is because Leo Moon squares Sun, not because Sun is in the 7th Place.

Uranus and Pluto in the 11th house: I don't have weird or controlling friends.

Non-events, so ignore them, too.

Part of your problem is you need to find a purpose in life, which is going to be difficult with Moon in aversion to Cancer 9th Place and in square with Sun.

With Mercury in the 7th Place trine your 11th Place, you might want to focus on your community, or a community, or something like that.
 

Anahath

Well-known member
Hmmm...I have a Scorpio rising,and for many years I've seen myself as unattractive.It turns out,that isn't true at all.

But people looking at you in a certain way or reacting negatively might be because of your attitude.People with Scorpio risings are like magnets and when they are in a bad mood they exert this kind of vulnerability and might encounter people who might try to put them down...we usually attract assholes.

But if you change your attitude and you smile and try to be kind and confident,you'll see that you'll encounter people who will see you as attractive.Remember,you don't have to be beautiful to be attractive.You can have that je ne sais quoi.

And poverty is a state of mind.Like prosperity.Once you are willing to advance materially,doors will open for you.It won't be easy.I was broke and I had to endure shitty jobs and terrible people but if you hang on,it will change.Remember,it's all in the attitude,when you're a lovely,attractive person,people will want to help and opportunities might just come out.It's just common sense.
 

Osamenor

Staff member
You'll just have to get used to not having a lot of money.
That isn't necessarily true. Capricorn in the second house usually indicates a need to work to make money, and it often leads to a feeling that you don't have enough or can never get enough. Jupiter in the second house often makes it very easy to make money, although it also tends to make you just as good at spending it. Capricorn is thoroughly frugal, so when Jupiter is in Capricorn in the second house, that usually leads to a strong ability to make money coupled with an equally strong ability to manage it well.

However, Jupiter can also interact with Capricorn to create poverty consciousness, and the situation you're in could make you poor--or at least broke--no matter what your second house looks like. Jupiter magnifies everything it touches, so if you're manifesting your second house Capricorn as a sense of being poor--or if you are genuinely struggling financially--Jupiter may magnify that tenfold. Second house relates to emotional security as well as material security, and when it comes to poverty or wealth, once you have enough money to keep yourself fed and housed, everything else has much more to do with your state of mind than with what you have or don't have.

If Jupiter in Capricorn in the second were a famous fictional character, it would be Ebenezer Scrooge: stuck in poverty consciousness from a genuinely impoverished childhood, he lives like a pauper and considers himself unable to afford anything even when he's become superbly rich.

You, however, have another factor that needs consideration: your second house cusp is in Sagittarius. That makes Jupiter the ruler of your second house, which greatly strengthens it in that position, and it means that your general sense of security, personal values, sense of self, ability to make money, etc. is rooted in the expansive qualities of Sagittarius. That could, again, magnify your sense of lack. It might play out in your life as vast swings between wealth and poverty. That combination of Sagittarius/Capricorn/Jupiter might give a bipolar quality to your sense of security, whether or not you suffer from genuine bipolar disorder: this month you're rich and you can afford anything, next month, you're on food stamps, or feel you ought to be. That could also play out in your self image: love yourself today, hate yourself tomorrow.

It's also possible to achieve balance between those two extremes, and make that combined Sag/Cap energy work for you. Sagittarius at its best brings a desire for expansion and growth, an innate curiosity, and a happy-go-lucky outlook. Capricorn at its best reigns in Sag's excesses, gives you a sense of practicality and a reality check when needed. With a healthy response to those energies, you could have a decent amount of confidence that you will always have enough along with the foresight and practicality to make that so.

With Mercury in the 7th Place trine your 11th Place, you might want to focus on your community, or a community, or something like that.
I, too, see lots of indicators of need for community in this chart.
 
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MaybeNow

Well-known member
That is most likely Cancer Venus conjunct Mars and both ruling the 6th/12th Places.
Since when has that ever indicated mental illness? I have two friends with that conjunction. One even has it in the exact degrees as the OP and he has been happily married with three kids for many years.
 
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