I saw that pattern of hating being told what to do very clearly, and I am very personally familiar with it, having been through the same thing myself. The boundary problem has a root, however. Often it comes from the mother - and I wouldn't necessarily rule that out, even though you said you really don't have a problem with her. I have a friend who, when questioned says he doesn't have a problem with his mother. BUT he refuses to let her know anything about his private life, unless he absolutely has to. He has a serious problem with his mother, who, although kind and wanting to help, has a strong tendency to think that she always knows what's best, and that he should do what she says. It's all done with the best of intentions, but has set off a serious complex in him.
The ascendant is strongly connected with the mother. Yours is a double whammy of Aquarius. The pattern started somewhere. Is there anybody else in your childhood that was more obviously overbearing, controlling,etc?
One of the possible interpretations of Sagittarius, in which you have a stellium in the 11th house, naturally ruled by Aquarius, is a "know-it-all" attitude. (Stellium signifies a concentration of that type of energy) The combination of Sag/Aquarius can be a tendency to create emotional and/or physical distance between yourself and others, who think they know what is best for your life.
To the extreme, this can manifest as a subconscious "drive" to call something black, when you know very well it's white, or up, when you know it's down, JUST for the sake of feeling like you have a sense of control.
The key is to realize that even though others may have acted like they were know it alls and an authority in your life, when it comes right down to it, you do have free will and no one can make up your mind for you. I have found that this begins in childhood and the child actually somewhere along the way makes the choice to do the mother's (or whoever's) will in order to get approval, feel loved, feel secure, etc. Then if the parental figure actually does try to give unwanted advice, impose their will, etc, it can take on a larger than life feel to it.
Please examine all that I've said very carefully. Listen to your emotions. Try watching yourself, as an observer, and ask yourself why you do what you do. I feel the words you used in your reply confirmed what I was getting very strongly.
As to intimate relationships, the distance the rebellion can put between you and another can tragically interfere with having any kind of real intimacy,depending on the severity. And the problem with the parent will tend to carry over into any type of close one-on-one relationship, also in boss/employee relationships. This is the 1st house/7th house polarity, and deals with the self and other.
I hope this has been of help to you. You didn't know what a can of worms you were opening, did you? LOL
I was wondering if someone could tell me something about my chart. Ive been tryin to learn but thigns start getting complicated hehe 
