Will Peter leave his wife?

[lillyjgc]

Hi.
Here is a horary question I was asked in the wee hours of the morning.I am curious about this chart for a few reasons.
Firstly I was asked the question by a woman who has been having an affair with this guy- (peter- not his real name of course!). The wife has found out about the affair.
The lover has temporarily (?) ended the affair just prior to the wife finding out about it. But now she is wondering with all her heart if the man she loves will choose to leave, or be forced to leave, his marriage.
Curiously the querent has asked will HE leave. Which gives Peter the ascendant in my opinion...Aquarius (which coincidentally is the wife's sun sign and Leo becomes *the wife* -curiously the sun sign of the husband! So I was wondering whether it would be okay to reverse the houses? (so Leo becomes the man, and Aquarius the wife.) The lover would then be either H11 or H5.
Before I go on to do a delineation I am hoping someone will help me clarify which rulers to use.

Chart Data:
may 01 2008
Time: 00:02:20
Lat: 33.55S
Long: 151.10E
Time zone 10hrs East
no dst
18.44 Aqu.rising.
Thanks. Lillyjgc.

[wintersprite1]

I have struggled through this same chart set up a few times. I did scour through AW archives and found that the few answers were a bit fuzzy and some inconsistency and more focus on the planets Venus and/or the Moon assigned on a chart to chart basis. Now what I have done that seems to work for the readings I have worked on is to use the 1st for the querent as a point of reference in placement. That would give the quested the position of the 7th. Now we know the spouse is in the turned 7th (the 1st). I then assign the turned 5th (the 11th) to the person that asked the original question because they are an affair to the 7th house person.

So, it ends up, the 1st house is the wife, the 7th the husband and the 11th the mistress.

Now in this wonderful world of synchronism, I believe that since I have decided that is how I will read those types of charts... anyone that will ask the question from me will form the question at the time to make the reading appropriate.

I am looking forward to hearing what others have done in the same situation.

TK

[lillyjgc]

Wintersprite1,
Thankyou ...This also gives the wife the same sign on her ascendant as is her natal sun sign! Which to me *feels right*.So shortly I will post my attempt at a delineation, on this basis.Please feel free (anyone) to have a go at the chart!
Cheers, Lillyjgc

[archergirl]

Hi there,

In relationship questions the quesited should always get the 7th house: that is, Peter will get the 7th. Because there is a wife involved, it makes sense to give her to the 1st house (7th from the 7th): she is signified by Saturn, which is an apt description of an unwanted spouse (or burdensome rival to the querent). Saturn being in the 7th house reinforces this: the wife is in Peter's 'house'.

In which case, the querent will get the Moon. I would also consider using Venus as her significator, since Venus rules lovers and girlfriends.

Cheers,
AG

[tikana]

okay girls,

angles are fixed - no changes
sun/saturn dont aspect
moon/sun sextile

either he is 1st or 7th, nothing is going on! answer is NO!

i am not seeing it him leaving

i could be wrong though..

to get a separation you shoudl have either square or opposition and angles should be cardinal!

moon trines mars *end of the matter*
then moon sextiles merc *5th house ruler and 8th*

Tik

[archergirl]

The Sun representing Peter is also played out if we use Venus for the querent's significator; Venus receives the Sun by domicile: he loves her. The wife, as Saturn in Virgo, hates the lover, being in the sign of Venus' fall...

AG

[lillyjgc]

Good point Archergirl,
So, taking the guy as the sun and the wife as saturn, we see the sun is separating from a trine to saturn....about 9 *somethings * ago- months I will say as that is when he started making plans to leave his marriage (to the extent of finding alternative accommodation, but not actually moving in).

His ruler is on the cusp of H4-endings, but the sun is void of course- *he doesnt know where he's going?*
I too notice the fixed signs on all the angles but 4 years ago I had a similar chart in front of me and all signs fixed on angles yet the answer proved to be yes-It just took four years to happen! So i say fixed angles do not *necessarily* mean there will be no change, but that it will be a long drawn out process.

In fact, the sun is about to move to another house- the fourth...The wife's fourth but Peter's tenth, and the lover's sixth house.(not sure how to interpret that.Maybe it means they will only make incidental contact as they go about their daily business-at work etc))It is 3 (long) somethings until the sun reaches H4 cusp, so I am concluding there that he will be slow to resolve matters (once and for all).
As Archer pointed out, the wife's ruler is Saturn and saturn is in Peter's house (literally) and not leaving anytime soon.(11 somethings-weeks?)

Saturn is standing still. Her first house is packed: Chiron right on top of her-she feels wounded, deceived (when the moon conjuncted neptune).
is there any movement between P's ruler and the lover's ruler? if we use the moon for the lover ,we see the lover in the wife's first house, in pisces-feeling compassion for the wife but also on cusp of lover's fourth house,so in *endings* mode.The moon and Venus are in mutual reception,both being in the sign of each other's exaltation.Venus is in the lover's fifth house of love affairs,but the husbands 11th of friendship- maybe he wants to maintain a friendship with his lover.

Do the sun and moon make any contact?
*Eventually* the moon will conjunct the sun but I would say this is a case of *after a lot of other things have happened* and the moon, though a fast mover will need to go through all of pisces, all of Aries then into Taurus.
The moon is in Jupiter's sign-which fits as, if we take the lover's house to be H11 (husband's fifth),we see optimistic Sag there-so Jupiter is ruler. Poor old jupiter- in Fall in the lover's second house-(she feels jaded and *fallen* by the whole experience.)The lover is located in the husband's sixth house I note also, and the wife's twelfth (she secretly *hates* the lover as Archer pointed out-)

In 22 *somethings*- months? venus will trine jupiter...Could this mean the lover will again find love? (with someone else?) Jupiter will very soon be retrograde,and move back into the lover's first house. What *rules* her is in saturn's sign-the wife...so the lover may feel very powerless to act,especially as the wife's ruler is on the verge of going direct!

The moon will sextile the sun-so I do see direct contact between the lover and the husband there, suggesting to me they will get together, but that the husband may continue to reside at home with his wife (although living *separately* in that home. His feelings though are toward the lover rather than the wife.Mercury applies a square to her ruler, in 5 (long) somethings- Mercury combusted with his ruler the sun a while ago.(his secret love was revealed, via telephone texts).
If jupiter (the lover) can be patient, then the sun (the husband) will trine her.
What say You?
Thanks, Lillyjgc

[Kawa]

Hi Lillyjgc,
i am not able to give an Horary answer yet, i am learning the rules.
The question is not your own but has been asked to you, so, the 7th house goes to the astrologer.
And "Saturn in the seventh either corrupts the judgment of the Astrologer, or is a Sign the matter propounded will come from one misfortune to another." (Lilly)
Now, which relation do you have with this woman? Is she a friend to you? If she is a friend, as i just imagine also because she asked you in the wee hours of the morning, or she could also be a relative, anyway who she is determines the houses, so that you can turn the chart.
Cheers.

[archergirl]

The question is not your own but has been asked to you, so, the 7th house goes to the astrologer.

Hi Kawa,

Actually this is a sort of outmoded 'rule' of Lilly's; Lilly and astrologers included themselves in readings during that time period as a verification that their arts were 'real'. Because they didn't have computer programmes to ensure accuracy they had to use many different types of reinforcement to 'prove' their accuracy, as in involving themselves in the chart. It was also sort of a get-out clause.

Nowadays there is no need to include the astrologer (as a disinterested 3rd party) in the reading of chart, so Saturn in the 7th is not a consideration one needs to, well... consider.

In this chart Saturn is a perfect fit for the 1st house person: the wife.

AG

Edit: I don't think we need to turn the houses here; we can keep them in a radix chart and still get an answer. Peter, the Sun, is about to change houses, being right on the cusp between the 3rd (short moves) and the 4th (a home). The wife still beholds the Sun by face, which isn't much; otherwise, they are separating. I think you are right to assess that it may take some time for this to resolve. The Moon, the querent, goes to meet the Sun; in angular houses with 6 degrees and fixed signs on the angles, it may be 6 months or so before they're able to be together.

[Kawa]

Hi, i was just trying to understand in which case the astrologer comes in, so the querent is the woman who had the affair. Hmmm, i think that Saturn in 7th if it is not corrupting the judgement of the astrologer (but then why it is considered in the Horary lessons of today?) for sure "is a Sign the matter propounded will come from one misfortune to another."
Thank you.

Edit: i don't know if the two things are related (7th house because of the astrologer or just because of the house in itself).

[archergirl]

Hi Kawa,

It's still considered in horary lessons, but as you learn more about horary you also learn when to heed the 'rules' and when to ignore them. This consideration you speak of is only used when Saturn *is not a major significator in the question*. In other words, if the Ascendant ruler was, say, Taurus, and the Descendant ruler Scorpio (ruled by Venus and Mars, respectively), and we saw Saturn in Scorpio in the 7th, this might be taken as a warning that something isn't 'right' about the chart. But this is highly dependent upon the context of the question.

In this chart here, however, Saturn in the 7th is of great relevance to the question. Saturn is the 1st house ruler, and the 1st house rules the wife. Saturn is in the 7th house: the house of the straying husband. This cannot and must not be taken as anything else, because the description is both literal and accurate: the wife is in the house of the husband. Literally. This is further emphasized because Saturn is in the sign of the fall of Venus, the mistress: Saturn hates the mistress.

In horary, EVERYTHING is context-dependent.
AG

[Kawa]

In fact, the sun is about to move to another house- the fourth...The wife's fourth but Peter's tenth, and the lover's sixth house.(not sure how to interpret that.

So, if the lover is not the querent (but why not?) then who is the querent?

[Kawa]

Okay, i just saw your answer, i have a long way to go but i would like to understand this question because i see it is complex and common too.
Thanks. (where do you get the smilies?)

[Kawa]

Oooops, Archergirl, sorry i am messing up, now i am going to read well your answer that i missed before! i just saw one only.You answered so quickly! Thank you.

[Kawa]

Hi Archergirl, yes i understand that when you are expert on the matter you also know when to skip the rules, but that's not my case now and so i need to follow something that's enough clear. For example i assign the houses always before seeing the chart also because i am reading questions for myself and i am afraid i may choose what is more convenient - do you get my point? So i need to know in this specific case who is the querent if not Saturn? Isn't the querent always the AC ruler (Saturn) and the Moon always the co-ruler also with the planets in the first house? Now here if you like to assign Saturn to the wife for reason that i don't know (because it fits with the question?) then the querent mistress should be the Moon. Am i right? I don't get how Jupiter comes in.

If jupiter (the lover) can be patient, then the sun (the husband) will trine her.

Yes i know Jupiter is the 5th from the 7th, the house of love affair, but does it mean that this question has no querent?
Or am i drunk without wine? Thank you.

Edit: i see you say

The Moon, the querent, goes to meet the Sun

does it mean we need to consider Jupiter as well? Very sorry to disturb with all these question.

[Moulin]

Hi Lily,

Wish l could help but it's just too complex for me.

Horary aside, does any husband leave their wife for a lover?

Never seen it happen yet

[archergirl]

Hi Kawa,

Isn't the querent always the AC ruler (Saturn) and the Moon always the co-ruler also with the planets in the first house? Now here if you like to assign Saturn to the wife for reason that i don't know (because it fits with the question?) then the querent mistress should be the Moon. Am i right? I don't get how Jupiter comes in.

I don't think Jupiter needs to come into this reading. Sometimes it is better to NOT take the literal house rulers, but to look and see who 'fits' better.

Venus and the Moon are rulers of women. The Moon generally rules wives, and Venus usually rules 'girlfriends'.

Because this is a question about 'husband vs. wife' we have to look at the chart as follows:

1. The Ascendant ruler is given to the querent. Okay.
2. The querent asks about her lover: he is given the 7th house.
3. The querent asks whether her lover will leave his wife. His wife is: the 1st house ruler. So we give the Ascendant to Saturn, and use the Moon as significator for the querent. Because she is also a 'girlfriend', we can look at Venus.

Sometimes it's even easier to just ask the question: 'Will we be together?' and leave the wives out of it altogether; but what you will find is that by receptions and symbolism, the wife will usually show up in the chart anyway. And funnily, 'unwanted' spouses VERY often show up being Saturn, which is generally an unpleasant planet.

In this chart, the husband (Sun) is in Taurus, Venus' sign. Since Venus rules girlfriends, we can assume that Venus in this chart represents the querent, since she is the girlfriend, yes?

There is a certain logic to all of this. Generally, you are right to try to assign the houses before you start reading the chart, but in more complex questions it is good to not be so literal-minded, and explore the symbolism of the chart instead.

AG

[barbh]

Or, what about using the IC as the 4th from his 7th..or the end of the marriage?
The 'end of Peter's marriage' may be when the Sun, conjuncts the IC in 2.5 degrees..?

just a thought
barb

[Kawa]

Hi Archergirl, THANK YOU VERY VERY MUCH!
Unfortunately i still need some kind of order to follow and i can't see the bigger picture yet, not even dare to answer yes or not to any question.
But what you say now is exactly what makes complete sense according to the rules i follow - except for Saturn/wife that's a new concept for me and i don't really get where it is coming from, i mean the choice. Most probably you know some more information that it is not clearly said here. The fact that a husband has an affair doesn't make a wife always hateful. I would say all husbands have affairs and very few leave the wife but just because i am learning Horary i avoid to judge the thing according to pre-concept. How do you know that the wife is an "un-wanted spouse"? Just recently i came across a similar case and the wife was a "wanted" spouse - maybe not loved in the way i know love - and the affair broke up, i guess now as result no one is happy in that triangle.
Besides, my three live-in boyfriends [i hate marriages] all of them had affairs and all of them wanted to stay with me at any cost when i discovered the affair but i threw them out. Yet i never hated the other woman, there was a moment i was even thankful to her. The other woman has no relation to the wife at all, according to me, but most probably i am not "normal" in fact i love freedom more than love.
So, according to my point of view of beginner, following the Horary rules, i would make the mistress Saturn - she is going to destroy a marriage and that's malefic according to society/religion [but good according to me] - and the wife is the Moon natural significator.
What is wrong if i follow the question this way? I am going to do it later and see what comes out of it.
THANK YOU very much again for helping my understanding.

Edit: If you don't mind i would like to use this case for study, and yes the girlfriend is Venus as well.

[archergirl]

Hi Kawa,

So, according to my point of view of beginner, following the Horary rules, i would make the mistress Saturn - she is going to destroy a marriage and that's malefic according to society/religion [but good according to me] - and the wife is the Moon natural significator.

Well, I see your logic, but this is a value judgment (that she will destroy a marriage). Saturn is usually not about destroying (although it represents decay and things that are rotting!): it is about restrictions, and structure, and things that represent an obstacle. In this question, the wife certainly represents an obstacle to the querent being with her lover, which is probably also why Saturn is shown in the 7th house.

Your logic about using the Moon to represent wives is also good, and we can certainly try to look at the chart from this perspective, but keep in mind that in reading a chart it is better to look at receptions and aspects than just simply at houses and planets. (Horary is complex, no? )

The Moon will almost always represent the querent. In this case, the Moon is in the 1st house, indicating a question of great emotional importance to the querent. Venus, as 'girlfriend', applies to conjunct the Sun, the husband; the Moon also applies to aspect the Sun. The Moon and the Sun have some reception happening: the Sun person idealizes and adores the Moon person, as the Sun is in Taurus and the Moon is exalted in Taurus. Venus is also in Taurus, and here we see the Sun person in the sign of Venus. So we can ascertain from this and this only, that the husband really, really digs whoever is represented by Venus and the Moon. Saturn, on the other hand, really, really *doesn't* like whoever is represented by Venus.

Basically, you have to have the story-line from the situation: what has happened to lead to the querent asking this question? And from there, you are much more easily able to pick out 'who is who' in a chart. You have to try to avoid putting your own value system onto whatever the chart says. You might not think that wives should hate mistresses, but the fact of the matter is, most wives DO; and Saturn, whoever Saturn represents, sure does dislike whoever Venus represents. So you have to make some logical connections between the chart and the story.

Cheers,
AG

[lillyjgc]

Hello-
Firstly Kawa, Its great to see you using this chart as a learning experience.
Usually I too would read Saturn in h7 as impairing the judgement of the astrologer, but Archer is quite right-its in context of the question. Of course one WOULD expect to see the wife in the husband's house...it makes sense.
I have had some further information from the querent....The husband has *told* the wife he is moving out today!(will check later to see if he *really* did!)
The stellium in the wife's first house had me puzzled- but not anymore! She confronted him about his affair *in front of the whole family*-like an arranged ambush! An angry dispute ensued, which has prompted his action to say he is leaving I suspect.With the moon moving toward Uranus this might be the shock that the lover received on hearing the latest developments.Even though he is, I think, leaving his wife, the client worded it that way- not asking if she and the husband will *get together*..She has already made it clear to him that while he stays in the same home as the wife and thus *in* the marriage, she can't be with him.I think she accepts that the issue of them *getting together* is another question for another time-but first things first.One last point- I see Neptune in the first house of the wife-she has been in serious denial about the state of her marriage.(If my husband moved into another part of the house I think I would be reading the writing on the wall-but this lady has been *turning a blind eye*-Saturn going direct has caused a rude awakening for her and she is very angry and upset-heading for the eighth house (eventually), but at least NOT heading back toward the husband.
I will keep you updated!
Thankyou to all of you.
Lillyjgc

[Kawa]

Archergirl, yes you are right

Well, I see your logic, but this is a value judgment (that she will destroy a marriage).

i did not express well, i meant that she put herself in a position considered dangerous for any marriage that potentially could break down because of her, or getting a strain to say the least.
Yeah Horary is complex but i started liking it very much since i started two months ago.
So, this is my reading, even though you are not going to agree, because you say

the Moon also applies to aspect the Sun. The Moon and the Sun have some reception happening: the Sun person idealizes and adores the Moon person, as the Sun is in Taurus and the Moon is exalted in Taurus.

Hmmm, is it not this one a value judgment? Where is the reception? Sorry but i see all three peregrines, and when planets are peregrine there is no reception.
Anyway i did my study and i am not saying that i am right, just that this is my interpretation, i am absolutely sure that i must be wrong somewhere, because i am still in the kindergarten of Horary.

Mistress/Saturn the querent is in her 7th house (leaving the astrologer aside i don't take it as a malefic position - ok?) and that's the first house of the quesited/lover. Is she the focal point in his life? There is a trine Saturn Sun but separating, and the Sun trines Pluto in his 5th house, also separating. Is the problem in the separation? Anyway Saturn is peregrine, she doesn't know what to go or where to go.
In the question is not clear who left the other before the wife discovered the affair, the mistress left the lover or vice versa? But i think she left and that's why the grandtrine is dissolving. She left and then she repented?
There is another trine between Venus (the other planet of girlfriend) and her 7th house, so it seems things were not going so bad between them, but it is applying so, maybe she wanted to go to the next level (sitting on a critical 0 degree) and he was not ready. Now she is sitting on the 3th house waiting for a message. But soon, in a month, she will grab the Sun in perfect conjunction, and then she will burn, and will be hidden from view, maybe she will have a difficult time expressing love. It is also possible that what she needs may tend to be overlooked because she is overshadowed by the Sun needs/desires.

Peter/Sun, the quesited, is another peregrine, in his own 9th house - is he going to "seek guidance and wisdom from others"? The lawyer, the priest or the astrologer? or just moving out of the house for a "journey that takes him to an unfamiliar environment."? It seems he is on the move, but i don't know where, he wants to move somewhere away from this situation (?).

Moon/wife sits in the 7th house of the husband and that's the right place to be for a wife, but she is Peregrine with no essential dignity, the marriage is not going anywhere, at least not in a positive way. She/Moonwife is also opposing Saturn/mistress - but separating (not opposing for long? and why? she may knows the solution).
"THE MOON OPPOSITE A PLANET indicates awareness of matters ruled by that planet [mistress - is she ash-blonde or black?] and the house where the planet is locate as well as the house(s) ruled by that planet." infact she knows about the affair (Leo rules 5th love affairs).
Why the Sun is in wife's 3th house? Could it be that he is only like a "general member of the family" and not really a husband anymore? he may be sleeping in the guest room or the couch, but for how long?
Besides the Moon in the 4th degree of mutable sign is in a critical position and "will bring matters to a critical point, a crisis, "or to a head," as in an illness or a quarrel".

So, the answer is no, Peter will not leave the wife at least "for now" and the wife is not going to sit silently.

Would be nice to know what happens next in real life.

[Kawa]

Hi Lilly,
don't know why i don't get the email alert, and i don't go on checking here, but great to see already an answer when i just posted my study.
Ah so it makes complete sense that the wife got this kind of reaction, now i have to review everything in the light of this new event.
Thank you.

[Kawa]

Hallo Lillygc, i am enjoying this case because it is perfectly peculiar to this kind of situation and because i don't even know any more detail than what is written here, i am bound to look at the chart only, doing my best to avoid any kind of judgment, this is my learning experience.

I have had some further information from the querent....The husband has *told* the wife he is moving out today!(will check later to see if he *really* did!)

Okay, so that has been his re-action, it doesn't mean that he is leaving the wife, it simply means that only because the wife discovered the affair he is leaving, not because he intended to leave. The wife is making his life there unbearable so he is forced to leave. You see my point?

The stellium in the wife's first house had me puzzled- but not anymore! She confronted him about his affair *in front of the whole family*-like an arranged ambush! An angry dispute ensued,

i think only modern Horary (of which i know nothing yet) consider the planets beyond Saturn, so i just noticed Pluto because of the trine, otherwise i try to ignore them (for now).

She has already made it clear to him that while he stays in the same home as the wife and thus *in* the marriage, she can't be with him.

This is a confirmation of what i said that she wanted to go to the next level.

Saturn going direct has caused a rude awakening for her and she is very angry and upset-heading for the eighth house (eventually), but at least NOT heading back toward the husband.

Saturn going direct has caused a rude awakening for her? I don't think so! Saturn went direct today and what caused the rude awakening was the discovery of the affair (that most probably she was suspecting).
Can you please explain your logic? What Saturn has to do with the awakening? It would be interesting to see the natals of these people!
Thanks a lot for the update!

[lillyjgc]

Kawa: Thankyou very much for taking the time to study this chart.I have a few things to comment on here and to clarify for you.
In regard to this, (explaining)

Quote:
the Moon also applies to aspect the Sun. The Moon and the Sun have some reception happening: the Sun person idealizes and adores the Moon person, as the Sun is in Taurus and the Moon is exalted in Taurus

.

Hmmm, is it not this one a value judgment?
No- it's a technical judgement.

<Where is the reception? >
The moon is usually exalted in Taurus and the husband's significator is the sun in Taurus. I think this is what was being referred to.

<Sorry but i see all three peregrines, and when planets are peregrine there is no reception. >

I have not heard/read that peregrine status over rules reception, especially when both the moon and sun are strong and angular as they are here.But if you can refer me to source material here I am very open to receive the information.

.<.. i am still in the kindergarten of Horary.>

Me too.
Clarifying:
<In the question is not clear who left the other before the wife discovered the affair, the mistress left the lover or vice versa? But i think she left and that's why the grandtrine is dissolving. She left and then she repented?>

The lover ended the affair before the wife found out.(only by a few days)
When forced by the wife to *choose* he responded by saying he would move out into a place of his own, that his affair was over, but that he still loved his mistress.
The sun is not peregrine in the chart- it is temporarily void-of course, but it will conjunct mercury before leaving the sign of Taurus.Just before that it will sextile mars...The sun is given an extra dignity by being on IC. *Peregrine* means lacking in essential dignities.
This void status of the sun may well describe the *lostness* the husband may currently be feeling-truly unsure of what is the best thing to do, but the sun is in Taurus and thus disposits to venus,who is exalted in Taurus, so the husband holds the lover in high esteem., whereas the sun beholds Saturn as a departing energy.

In regard to:
<Peter/Sun, the quesited, is another peregrine, in his own 9th house - is he going to "seek guidance and wisdom from others"? The lawyer, the priest or the astrologer? or just moving out of the house for a "journey that takes him to an unfamiliar environment."? It seems he is on the move, but i don't know where, he wants to move somewhere away from this situation (?).>

Well, Peter, the Sun is only 3 deg from the 4th cusp so that would be his tenth...*going out into the world*. He is seeking professional guidance from others and has been for some time.Yes he has planned to move to *his own place* -in unfamiliar territory at a distance from both the wife and the lover, (close enough to drive daily though- so third house, I guess)

<

Moon/wife sits in the 7th house of the husband and that's the right place to be for a wife, but she is Peregrine with no essential dignity, the marriage is not going anywhere, at least not in a positive way. She/Moonwife is also opposing Saturn/mistress - but separating (not opposing for long? and why? she may knows the solution).>

I see the moon (the lover) as having been the *opposition* to Saturn, the wife.The moon has just left Neptune behind, breaking the secret opposition.

<THE MOON OPPOSITE A PLANET indicates awareness of matters ruled by that planet [mistress - is she ash-blonde or black?]

She is blonde.

and the house where the planet is locate as well as the house(s) ruled by that planet." infact she knows about the affair (Leo rules 5th love affairs).>

Yes, I think that the wife *found out* when the moon opposed Saturn...2 days before I cast this chart.I think she suspected prior to this but didn't have any *proof*, then suddenly she stumbled upon the proof.

Why the Sun is in wife's 3th house?

She looked through her husband's phone.(probably when Pluto was trine saturn exactly). The sun is too close to H4 cusp really to say its in the third.Its gone through the third, now entering house of endings for wife.

Could it be that he is only like a "general member of the family" and not really a husband anymore? he may be sleeping in the guest room or the couch, but for how long?

Yes. I said in my earlier post they had been living separately in the same home. He had a part of the house to himself, but still participated in family matters.

Besides the Moon in the 4th degree of mutable sign is in a critical position and "will bring matters to a critical point, a crisis, "or to a head," as in an illness or a quarrel".

I have not heard that the fourth degree of a mutable sign is critical for the moon...am interested to hear what school of astrology describes that..but given the circumstances things certainly are coming to a head, not just for the mistress, who has patiently waited for a number of years now.

<Would be nice to know what happens next in real life.>

The mistress's phone isnt answering. Thats a definite indication that *something* is going on. Will update you as soon as I can.
Again, thanks for your valuable input.
Cheers, Lillyjgc.