Venus/Pluto in Synastry and Composite?

[bttrklk]

is there anyone who knows about venus-pluto quincunx aspect? i couldn't find any good explanations about it.i know that one person will be more obsessive and the other one will have the upper hand in pluto-venus contacts but the roles change according to the aspects.in conjunction pluto person will be the more obsessive one and in opposition or square,the venus person will be.but there is no enough information about quincunx.i have venus pluto contacts with the man i love but i can't predict who has the obsession

-my venus opposite his pluto at 6 degrees
-his venus quincunx my pluto exactly

[Claire19]

The problem with synastry is that is confusing and contradictory. The composite aspect is more indicative of the relationship and how others tend to view you as a couple. THe dynamics at play and they are not always as one might expect.

Venus square Pluto, depending on which houses are involved can mean financial woes and also a degree of manipulation and secrecy. Obsessive and dominating characteristics. Sexual issues. One aspect alone should not determine if you go or stay. We come together to grow and serve out our karma and all is not a bed of roses in any relationship.

[MelissaM]

If you are ready to change yourself well you should stay but if you are not ready and you resist to change the way you think about love, your ways, actually what you are now, well you just have to let go and keep yourself the way you are. The venus person has a powerful energy who is capable to change the pluto person through hard times. "Very challenging times" for both if they unite. I consider this aspect as a tranformative aspect, the Phenix aspect. The pluto person in my life brought me deep hurt and cries in my soul. I love myself and I won't allow him to manipulate me and keep lying to me. For some people this aspect bring something good into their life, this just depends how the person is. Always check her/his natal chart first, then compare both by getting a synastry chart to know how the energies combine and then do the composite chart to get deeper into the relationship.. love is not based only in attractions, you should be able to trust, mutual respect, mutual understanding and no mind games in order to be "real love"

[moonwillow]

I am with you MelissaM

[Vagabondgirl]

My ex boyfriend had his Venus in Aquarius exactly square my Mercury/Pluto conjunction in Scorpio. My best friend and roommate has the same placement of Venus. I also have Jupiter conjunct their venus in Aquarius. I had intense relationships (friend and boyfriend) with both of them. Either extreme pleasure or extreme rage. Thin line between love and hate (or irritation) maybe? And there is a new guy I like that has the same birthdate as the ex.... Quite intense emotions there, love/hate again:P Its seems like the intense emotions from them is some kind of "catalyzator" for funny psychic experiences too though.

My dad has his Venus (Taurus) in opposition to my Mercury/Pluto. His Pluto (Leo) is squaring this again. And my mum has natally Venus/Pluto conjunction. So it seems like Ive always had this Pluto aspect in synastry almost my whole life. So for me all this might be "normal".

Also, what these people have in common is that they in their own ways are a little or at times VERY secretive. Trying to hide stuff from me or others all the time. This bothers a Mercury/Pluto in Scorpio person I feel I mean it worries me that they try so desperately to hide stuff, cause it doesnt feel so healthy. And I can be honest with them about stuff and they get like the shocks of their lives...

[Chirongirl]

Originally Posted by aquacan

I know exactly what is this, it is as you have decribed my relationship (the first one you've described) with my ex (at last we managed to go apart!). He has his Pluto trining (not square, notice) my Venus and I have Pluto trining his Mercury ruler of his 7th (He says that us was his only successful marriage (!) which amazes me because for me was only hell!).
And I do get angry when I read things that say that this is not a tough aspect if one is willing to experience things deeeply and transform oneself and blablabla... I've challenged myself deeply, put at stake all my beliefs and the result was only hell. And I do think that Pluto-Venus realtionships as I've seen more than a couple around me (and that goes for tr Pluto con Venus as well) are always about two people that are sick. One pathologically psycologically sick and other, who tries to be the so-called healer but ends up discovering that has deep issues of low self-steem to have decided to cope with that anyway. That has been my experience and I've seen this happening a couple times in friends of mine, as well. At the end, one after being totally exhausted in his/her soul energies just have to give up and face the fact that the other is just mental/emotionally handicapped, vulgo, a pathological case often described in books of mental illness (and you did not have a clue in the beginning?!). The question is why should someone (often Venus) being attracted in the first place to a sick person? Low steem seems to be often the answer (most commonly comes out of a wounded heart or childhood issues). And I doubt that anyone hasn't had the intuition since the first moment of this relationship that this would end up badly (for you, of course) but decided to go on despite of this intuition.

To sum up, I see sickness in the pathological sense in this relationships Venus-Pluto, sorry if that ofends someone or is to harsh on someone who is now still under the spell of someone. But I am yet to be convinced that this is not the case.

aquacan

Such simple truth in such simple words. I agree with every single word you said in here, even with the intution! The first time I saw my ex who and I share a double whammy of Venus Pluto along with his Venus squaring my Moon, deep down someone screamed at me: RUN!! My whole instinct shouted at me to run and get away of that person. It felt pure evil. but then again...you do get sucked into Pluto's dark hole.

You truely deserve a prize for your comment, Aquacan.

[moonwillow]

I have recently experienced this, venus conj pluto (me) and Pluto conj venus (him) we had other venus/pluto and venus/neptune venus/saturn, sun/jupiter/uranus aspects.

I agree with with Aquacan. These are tough aspects to deal with, and when he (pluto) came into my life I was going through hell in my current relationship. I mean HELL, it seems to me from what I have read is that these aspects get triggered or these people come into our lives when we are at our most vulnerable.

I don't know much about astrology, only just learning. Learnt alot from reading threads and posts on this site, another aspect of this is that we Plutonion people, (I have venus square pluto natally amongst others) we tend to attract these people.

misery attracts misery at least in my case. Now all I do is think of him, my mercury also conjunct his pluto 0 orb.

I do intend to RUN each time someone like this comes into my life again
I am glad this is over and we will never have contact again. At least I can get on with my life. Even if I think of him every passing hour.
I am relying on mother time to help. It will heal. I hope.

[Venusinlibra]

Im glad to read all those posts about people that HAD venus/pluto relationships and survived, because Im just begining to dive into one relationship like that and I feel like Im tied inside an runaway train. Ive had sick relationships before (moon in the 12th square venus, saturn in the seventh house) so I know very well how they look like. And I simply cant prevent myself to fall again! Me and this guy, we dont have venus/pluto conexions in sinastry, but in composite uranus conjunt pluto in the 12th/asc and both square venus in 3th.

And I can see all the signs of the ordeal Im going through, and I dont have the strength to get out. The sexual atraction, the manipulation, the fear of being deserted AGAIN and left alone to deal with you misery, while the other seems to be so perfect and fortunate in everything.

The only really good aspect we have is that in sinastry his netune conjunt ascendant trines my moon conjunt ascendant.

Question: theres no way, at all, a relationship like this turn into something pleasant, warming, rewarding?

PS - I said Im begining? We have been dating for 1 and half year now, and he still refuses to give me his adress and phone number! He lives in another country, so he comes and goes, aparently, to the outer space.

[desperateneptune]

Venus pluto aspects have a lot of lessons to give even if you are the one to suffer the abusive behaviour..they make you stand up for yourself or else you ll be eaten alive...at the end you have gained a valuable experience equal to a treasure

[pudinnpop]

Here Here!!! I agree with the last poster..Such was the case in my relationship!! I actually got tougher!!

[Venusinlibra]

Originally Posted by desperateneptune

Venus pluto aspects have a lot of lessons to give even if you are the one to suffer the abusive behaviour..they make you stand up for yourself or else you ll be eaten alive...at the end you have gained a valuable experience equal to a treasure

wow, that really sounds like something a scorpio would say. I have a scorpio cousin who broke the hearts of many girls, by manipulating and using them like things. And when I confront him, he always says: "I made them a favor. They are tougher now".

[desperateneptune]

lol i am the scorpio here with venus conj pluto nataly but i was the one to suffer the abuse...i have been acting like the happy cinderela all my life until this person showed up and forsed me to "own" my pluto and not give it away so in a twisted sence i owe him a favour!!!!

[Venusinlibra]

My dear, being a scorpio, u will probably learn the lesson at first. Me, being moon and ascendant cancer, will never learn...

[Munch]

Pluto/Mars/Saturn...be prepared to bring out the whips and crops. This is heavy and can bring out some sadistic streaks.......but if the overall synastry is loving it could just point to some extremely kinky/domineering stuff.

[Venusinlibra]

LOL, I want a relationship just like u described, Munch!

[CosmicBlyss]

Originally Posted by MaeMae

as regards these venusian/plutonian relations, i can remember something that robert blaschke, (still with us in spirit) told me:

"Intensity is no equal to intimacy."

Intimacy takes trust and truth and mutual reciprocation. My experience with this man, his pluto opp. my venus lacked all three of these elements.

The depths that this relationship has taken me are staggering. I suppose at some point, perhaps I am already beginning to, I will realize that it did take me deep into my own desires, which revealed an uncomfortable darkness that needed to be exposed and cleansed. That's pluto working.

Nonetheless, to want someone that is so bad for you, who takes you to the depths of despair and humiliation? I'll pass on this one next time!

Post Script*
Thinking about helpful tranists that are helping me move away from this relationship - Transiting Uranus in Aries is conjuncting our composite 8th house moon. Transformation? possibly, but definitely an ending. I think it takes the powerful outer planets Ur-Nep-Pl to bust a couple free or from the Venus-Pluto grip. How people survive this type of relationship is mindboggling. I felt if I was to stay locked into it one more minute, I would go crazy - so much manipulation and power trips by both of us. In fact, I might have gone a bit over the top in my behaviors with him. I think I'll be so grateful I got myself free from it that I won't even be embarrassed by my behaviors working to do it. There's gotta be an easier way. But this is my experience only.

That's really good.
I do believe I chase and pine for the mythical creature known as Intimacy [Juno in Cancer in 8th, square Pluto + a strong Lilith placement] and assume I will find it directly attached to intensity (men that have strong water in their charts who emote feeling (Pisces/Cancer) or generate an aura of feeling (Scorpio) I can connect to/with that definitively snare my attraction)..but real Intimacy is not just experiencing compulsory feelings with/for someone basically on their own..if it's primarily you providing the emotional glue keeping a relationship's pieces together..something inherently required for longevity and fulfillment is missing.

Like, while it may be a basic fact that strong feelings/reactions exist for/with someone, that does not mean that the situation/involvement is actually what you're looking/hoping for (authentic Intimacy) or actually even possible at all (Neptunian illusion/delusion)..particularly if the person on the other end of the personal equation does not/cannot meet you emotionally anywhere near the submerged half way point (if you show/tell/share your "stuff" I'll show you mine, for example - building trust and forging acceptance in the process), let alone follow you or (God forbid..) lead you, all the way to the other side of deep connection/total dissolvement.
"Don't stop - believing" One can only hope..

[Marymat]

I'm new to astrology, I've always had an interest but never the time. Part of the reason I am looking into it now is because of a bad breakup that I have not been able to get over. In trying to keep myself busy I have made the search for answers much harder.

My ex has now gone back to his last girlfriend who was very emotionally and verbally abusive to him. I noticed in their synastry chart that her pluto is square to his venus. From reading this thread this might explain his pull to her.

In our synastry chart, his Venus is sextile to my Pluto. I just noticed that my venus is square to his pluto as well. Can anyone give an opinion to this combination in our synastry?

[Claire19]

Originally Posted by Venuslure

Hello, I was wanting to know if anyone could tell me more about Venus/Pluto contacts in synastry and composite chart? The reason I ask is because I have Venus sextile Pluto and Pluto trine Venus in synastry with someone, and Venus square Pluto in the composite chart. Does anyone else have this going on with someone you know, if so how do you handle it or walk away from it?

Interesting you brought this up. They are powerful love aspects for sure. Major transformations through finances and or love.....Sometimes there is an obsessive quality even with the easier connections. I wouldnt walk away on the strength of just one aspect.....I have found that easy aspects in synastry can manifest as more difficult ones in composite. Making me think that we shouldn't really place too much emphasis on the nature of contact but just that the contact exists. The composite chart is THE relationship that is created at the third entity and shows the dynamics at play between you and especially as others perceive the relationship....Synastry is interpersonal connections and can be contradictory and confusing..\
.SO although I look at them I place far more emphasis on the composite. THe transits there as well. However the orb of aspect is necessarily smaller than on a natal chart for both synastry and composite. I wouldnt give credence to any more than 3 degrees......

Others may disagree.

[Claire19]

Originally Posted by Marymat

I'm new to astrology, I've always had an interest but never the time. Part of the reason I am looking into it now is because of a bad breakup that I have not been able to get over. In trying to keep myself busy I have made the search for answers much harder.

My ex has now gone back to his last girlfriend who was very emotionally and verbally abusive to him. I noticed in their synastry chart that her pluto is square to his venus. From reading this thread this might explain his pull to her.

In our synastry chart, his Venus is sextile to my Pluto. I just noticed that my venus is square to his pluto as well. Can anyone give an opinion to this combination in our synastry?

Without your charts it is difficult to tell as we have to see the whole picture and integrate it....The areas that these aspects affect is all important. Pluto is a strong magnetic force and no doubt about it. It can lead to unleashing dark passions if not recognised and handled.
So the obsessive quality can be destructive but strangely compelling. He may somehow find the abuse strangely arousing or stimulating. Also unless you witnessed the interplay with him and ex, you are only hearing his side of it, I would suggest. It takes two to tango....and to buy into a situation.....

[Claire19]

Originally Posted by Inline

I'm interested in the idea that Venus/Pluto aspects may indicate some kind of karmic tie. My lover and i have Venus oppo Pluto in our composite chart, and we have not been able to end our relationship for 13yrs.

I have a Venus quincunx Pluto in my natal chart (3°) and he has an exact trine Venus/Mars in his natal chart. But i think its our exact Ven/Plu opposition in the composite thats creates attraction pure. It was love at first sight for me. Our first weekend lasted 3 days and 3 nights of nonstop, fu** fest, as if we were starving for each other, and our only break was to fall asleep still bound together.

Its addicting, suffocating, scary, and the jealousy and the fear....but we just can't/won't say good bye, and we've tried.

You describe this aspect perfectly. Venus opposite Pluto. It is compelling and deep and yes it may well be from past association and karmic.....Your quincunx would bear more on an irritation that is chronic, such as a health issue.. That it has lasted so long is significant but why do you want to break away?? Is it a taboo or secret association???
We all have negative and positive to deal with in relationships and very rarely are we always in accord. That is not growth producing.....

[Claire19]

Originally Posted by Munch

Pluto/Mars/Saturn...be prepared to bring out the whips and crops. This is heavy and can bring out some sadistic streaks.......but if the overall synastry is loving it could just point to some extremely kinky/domineering stuff.

That comment is general and as I have Pluto Mars Saturn in connection and involving the 8th house as well. I dont agree that it is necessarily sadistic, cold or cruel in a physical sense always. But karmic, absolutely. THe aspects also affecting these planets elsewhere will tell the whole story..

[Marymat]

Originally Posted by Claire19

Without your charts it is difficult to tell as we have to see the whole picture and integrate it....The areas that these aspects affect is all important. Pluto is a strong magnetic force and no doubt about it. It can lead to unleashing dark passions if not recognised and handled.
So the obsessive quality can be destructive but strangely compelling. He may somehow find the abuse strangely arousing or stimulating. Also unless you witnessed the interplay with him and ex, you are only hearing his side of it, I would suggest. It takes two to tango....and to buy into a situation.....

This is where I get confused as to how it all ties together. I have read several sticky's but the light isnt coming on.

His venus (12th house) is sextile to my pluto (11th house). My venus (8th) is square to his pluto (2nd).

I dont understand why I havent been able to get past it.

[Marymat]

Oh and I did witness some things firsthand, as we were aquaintances. Also our kids (his and mine) were in class together so I did meet the girlfriend a few times. After the girlfriend met me a second time he started avoiding me. Later he admitted it was because she didnt like me.

Also a few months after she and I met, she found some texts messages between he and I and got upset. The messages werent inappropriate or anything. I was the class "room mom" at the time and the texts were regarding something the class was doing and needed. Later at 2 am I got a text from her that said "he's (4 letter word)ing me now. How does that make you feel?" When I didnt respond she starting calling my phone so that I could actually hear them doing it. She called another 3 times until they finished and it then he realized what had happened. She's nuts.

I wont put anything past him. He very well may enjoy the drama between them. I will say that he does have tendencies towards depression and low self esteem. He was verbally abused as a child and somewhat neglected.

[Marymat]

Another story...when she found out that he and I had started dating she began calling him non stop and he ignored her. Finally she sent him a text message saying that she was 4 months pregnant. She had been to the obgyn etc. She was lying, just trying to get him to call her back. She didnt understand why we made "such a big deal over it."

[desperateneptune]

in venus pluto interactions in synastry is it always the pluto person that manipulates the other or could it be the venus person as well?