Freedomlover is lonely :(

[freedomlover]

I have been divorced and alone for almost 12 years. During this time I really haven't had a long-term significant relationship either. The closest I came was a guy I started dating about 1 1/2 years ago, but figured out within just a couple of months that he wasn't for me. I kinda kept him around because I was lonely. I wanted to stay friends, but he was looking to get married. Obviously I wasn't, so, needless to say, this went nowhere. He wound up closing up completely, and so wasn't even friendly companionship to me. I've since cut ties completely with this guy, although of course, I am still kind and talk to him if we should meet in the grocery store, for instance.

I keep thinking that I would really, really like to have someone to spend some time with and get to know. Which brings me to my current question(s)......

There is a guy I met in 1999. He lives in the area I used to live that I want desperately to move back to. I don't know him, really, except as an acquaintance. He is the best friend of my best male friend. I have spent some time around this guy a few times sporadically through the years since then. He helped me move some things a couple of times (with our mutual friend) I have felt a draw to him ever since I met him. I last saw him in person sometime in 2003. I lost touch with our mutual friend for a few years when he got married. But in August of this year, he tracked me down and called me out of the blue. We talked for a while, and a couple of days later, he called back. He said, "I've got a surprise for you.", and put his best friend on the line with me. (I'll call him "D" from now on.) D and I talked for over an hour, and that old familiar draw has haunted me ever since.

"D" is a few years older than me, never been married. He and I have several things in common. We are both empaths, and both tend to be recluses, partly because of the empathic ability, and not being able to handle it well. We both have suffered from fatigue-type illnesses for years. We are both very interested and educated in nutrition and holistic healing, he moreso than me. He has spent the past several years studying holistic and nutritional healing on his own, and this may be his calling. He has some metaphysical background and is very open-minded, although his mother is a raging Baptist( A kind woman from what I hear, but very "religious"). He is a Scorpio, born 11-11-60.

I uploaded a chart for the time I asked the question "Why do I feel so drawn to this guy?"

View chart for this question


A little while after I asked that question, I was thinking of it again, and wondering if the Spirit was trying to tell me something about this guy. Just then, my daughter asked me to come watch a Twilight Zone episode with her. In the opening scene, one of the main characters was introduced. He had the same name as "D"!!!!!! "D"'s first name is quite an unusual name, too! Definitely not one you hear everyday. Hmmmm......
Which led me to ask this next question: "Are we meant to get together?"

View chart for this question

(If you're having trouble viewing the chart, you'll need to do one of the following, depending on your browser: Click in the upper left hand corner - you should see a little magnifying glass
OR Click in the upper left hand corner - look for orange ball with blue arrows in lower right hand corner of chart - click on the orange ball.)


(I wasn't sure which question should be used for the horary, so I posted both, since they were technically two different questions, anyway)

Thanks for the help, guys!!!!

[freedomlover]

Bumping it up. It got lost in the shuffle quickly.

[freedomlover]

Come on, guys, throw me a bone!




(Please?)

[freedomlover]

Just what do you mean by this cryptic reply, dear Charm????

You sounded like the guy on "Kung Fu". I'm surprised you did not end this with the word, "grasshoppah". :rotflmao:

[freedomlover]

Well, Charm, you are right - he is very shy. The problem is he is over 450 miles away from me. He lives back in the area of the country that I've been chomping at the bit to get back to. I guess I COULD find a way to contact him. I just wanted some horary insight to back me up to see if it there was anything I should be aware of, etc. I'm wondering if I should have asked specifically is he was interested in me, but maybe that info would come up in the horary answers (if a horarist or two would kindly respond, that is.)

[freedomlover]

What are you doing? reading a tarot card reading in between posts? LOL. How is it obvious that he knows I like him? I have held my cards very close to my vest around him. Also, to clarify about our mutual friend..... He's just like that, it could have easily been any number of people he could have "surprised" me with. "D" just happened to have been with him at the time he made the call. The mutual friend DOES know that I am fond of "D". However, since he was also aware that I was still kind of hung up on an old flame, he was not exactly supportive of putting in a good word for me. The last time we brought the subject up, about 3 or 4 years ago, he told me in so many words that he was not going to give me his blessing, so to speak, because he thought I would break "D's" heart. He is very protective of "D", and I think may try to interfere. He felt pretty strongly about this at the time. ( I have since gotten over the old flame.) There are a lot of factors influencing this situation, and so I asked the horary. Yes, Mars acts on impulse, but I have learned to look before I leap, thanks to too many hard knocks from NOT doing so. Mars IS in Capricorn, remember!

I appreciate your help, and the opportunity to "sound out" some of this stuff.
Thanks, Charm!

[freedomlover]

Yes, it is a situation that needs to be approached with some common sense, as well. I guess phoning may be the first course of action, if I decide that I should act on it. Also, I have been single for 12 years. The mutual friend knew this, but was being protective because he knew I wasn't completely over the old flame, which was still the case the last time we spoke, which was this past summer. I have been single the whole time.

[freedomlover]

My first attempt to post this got deleted.

Love your abbreviations! :rotflmao:


Okay, here's the scoop:

I last saw OF in April '97, but basically hadn't seen him since Nov'96. We were a long distance romance. I met D around May of 2000, I believe.

MF and I were very close, so he knew alot about me. He knew how I felt about OF, as I had told him on several occasions. OF and I were a case very similiar to CosmicPixie and Lillybelle's stories on the forum today. I had had several dreams back then that would seem to say that OF and I would get back together one day, so I was hoping for that to happen. MF, of course, knew all about this. But, recently, I decided that it might not happen in this lifetime, therefore why thow my life away? I've "closed the door" on OF. My feelings for him aren't quite what they used to be either - just a fond memory now. Also, I realize I may have not interpreted the dreams correctly back then, as I was not nearly as clear on interpretations as I am now. MF is guarding D against the possibility of OF reentering the picture. Of course, I can't entirely rule out that possibility, but I'm willing to roll the dice with someone else and see what happens. OF may reenter my life, but what if I am 60? I assume if I was with someone else, and OF and I were meant to get back together, that I and whoever I was with would be growing apart at that time.

It's funny..... About the only way I know to get in touch with MF is to call D first! Around and around and around it goes.......

[freedomlover]

Nope, no e-mail for either of them. MF has a wife that is jealous of me for no reason. MF and I were like brother and sister - never anything romantic. It's hard to contact him because of this. He usually calls me when he gets a chance. However I currently have no way for him to call me, as I am not allowed to receive calls here.

It's like a soap opera..... "As the stomach turns....."

Anyway, now that that's settled..... what does one have to do to find a horarist in this town??

[freedomlover]

C'mon guys.... please?

I never post anything about my love life...
because I DON'T HAVE ONE!!!!

( and I want one. Please help.)

[freedomlover]

Any horarists up for this one yet?

[Summery Joy]

OK. Just saw this. Been away from the forum for a while.

I don't even know how to begin to answer the first question, so I'm gonna move right along to the second; are you meant to be with D?

The Moon (you) is too far from that trine with Saturn (ruler of 7th). Lots of frustrations ahead. BUT, it is the last planet the Moon aspects before it leaves its sign. Also, the Moon is actually in a partile inconjunction with Mars (ruler of 5th) separarting by one second. While I normally don't take minor aspects into account, this one is difficult to ignore.

I think you have a chance there. The inconj is a difficult aspect, so I believe the chart shows some effort that has to be done to get to the relationship (trine) in the end.

My final answer; yes, but you two have to work hard towards it.

[Spica3]

Hi Freedomlover,

Actually, I find that natal charts are best for answering these types of questions. Yours alone would be good. Better if you can give both.

Anyways.....

I think the 2nd question is more appropriate for answering. And I also think you already know the answer to the 1st question.

So I took a look at the 2nd chart. I'd really like to read it, but I also want to do a careful job, so could I do it tomorrow, pleeease? It's WAY past my bedtime, and I have a long day tomorrow. Sorry....

From just a quick glance, it looks promising......but don't get your hopes up yet. I'd go for Moon = you, Mars = him, but I do need to check on that. I noticed straight away that Moon and Mars are in the exact same degree AND minute!!! And both in Mars' signs. Probably explaining the identical similarity between you both.

Then I noticed Moon is disposited by Mars - you're into him, all right. Probably more than he is into you.....but as I said, I'll scrutinize it all later.

You're strong, he's strong - that's good. But you're in a better position, being on MC and elevated - it may have to be you who has to take the initiative, but let's see first. He's in the 4th - some interesting possibilities there......

Aw, wish I had time to do it now. It'll have to be tomorrow! Or I won't get any sleep.

You could call him up to wish him Happy Birthday tomorrow. But other than that, I'd wait till after MercR to go further, if I were you.

BTW, I read your earlier thread about your daughter's pet rat - that was such a sad story! Did it ever come back? Firstly, I'm no horary expert, but actually, and excuse me for saying this, when I saw that chart, it seemed like it had death written all over it. I mean, there were connections to the 8th house, and malefics afflicting the significator from all over, and.... I'm really sorry! It must've been hard, especially since you're both so attached to it. I thought Cossie's answer was sweet too, but you know, she does make sense, and it just might be true.

[freedomlover]

Sorehearted and Spica3,

Thanks sooooo much!!!! I had pretty much given up on getting any horary answers on this one. I had been thinking about deleting the thread.

It's interesting though, that the thought came to me that the reason I was not getting any "help" (answers) with this one was because I had subconscious resistance to a relationship and therefore did not really want it. I have worked on this for a while. It's interesting to note that just today, I was able to identify and release the resistance. Within just a few minutes of this, I checked the forum, as I had not done so for hours - and Sorehearted had answered my question! Hmmmm........ And then a little later - Spica3.... hmmmmm After all this time with no "bites"? I think that, my friends, is a good example of how energetic resistance in the subconscious can block what you think you want. But, I digress.....

Sorehearted,

Thanks again for your reply. I wonder if all of the "inner work" I've done since I posted the question is part of the work you saw? Also, we are currently about 450 miles apart - so that's an obstacle. Not to mention the fact that he's totally in the dark about this (unless he's been thinking about me, too. In fact, I've wondered if this is why I've been thinking of HIM so much the past few weeks - seemingly out of nowhere. We haven't seen each other for over 3 years, and only talked once, back in August of this year.

Spica3,

Hello to you! and thanks for your answer, as well! Of course you can wait till tomorrow - I am grateful for any time at all that you're able to spare to work on this. I wonder if what you saw about me being more into him is that, as far as I know, he doesn't know I'm interested - or if he is thinking of me, he thinks
nothing would come of it because of the distance? I don't know.

As to Zoey..... we never found her. We like to think that she is happy making her home in the wild. Cossie's reply would seem to support that - made a nest somewhere.

[Spica3]

Apparently, William Lilly uses the 11th, 7th and 3rd for love between 2 people, where marriage is not on the cards.

He uses the 5th house exclusively for questions about children, and in some cases, in questions about whether the querent receives something from the father.

In all questions where there is any kind of mention of marriage, he looks at the 7th, even for such as "Will I ever get married?"

It appears to me that the 11th is probably the Hope or Wish for the love of the other person; the 7th is probably The Other or Partner; and the 3rd likely to be the Communication between them.

So here goes.

Ascendant: Cancer, cardinal, feminine sign, emotional - sounds like you, question is fit to be answered.

Ascendant Lord: Moon / Aries 7° / 10th, angular, most elevated - you are in command, or will take the initiative.

All 3 significator houses of Quesited do not contain planets.

11th Lord: Venus / Scorpio 10° / in 4th
7th Lord: Saturn / Leo 24° / in 2nd
3rd Lord: Mercury / Scorpio 23° / in 5th

No trines or sextiles between Asc Lord and Significators of Quesited - "they love not one another".

Moon has no aspect to 11th Lord - you probably won't get what you hope for.

Moon has no aspect to 7th Lord - there is little or no feeling between the 2 parties.

Moon has no aspect to 3rd Lord - no communication between the 2 parties.

11th Lord not angular - thing hoped for will not come to pass.

Dispositor of Moon, Mars, in fixed sign and angular - either you eventually get what you hope for, or you are the initiator of the actions.

That's about all Lilly had to say about this. Sorry, Freedomlover, it doesn't look good. The overall answer to your question seems to be 'no'.

Even the mutual friend's (11th for you, 5th for D) ruling planets, Venus and Mars respectively, don't make any aspect to Moon. That friend may have got his lines crossed, or is clueless himself about any of this.

Let's see if I can pick up anything else.

7th Lord Saturn opposes Neptune in the chart - there's something about him that is unclear or hidden, or HE may be in the dark about something, or both.

POF is in 8th, opposed by 7th Lord Saturn - you make an emotional investment in this relationship and keep on hoping, but he doesn't see it in the same way.

Mars (males), Sun (Men), Venus (Females) stellium trines Uranus (Friends) - it seems you both prefer to just be friends and keep your freedom for the moment, he more so than you.

Moon trines 7th Lord Saturn in 17° - could be 17 hours or days from time of Query.

Moon also trines Pluto, 5th co-Lord, at same time - there is desire or romantic feelings on your side.

Unfortunately, Moon squares own house, the Asc (you) - there might be some discomfort during the contact.

Seventeen hours after the question:

Transiting Moon has moved to 15° Aries and makes only a sextile to Neptune - you may have had some rosy dreams at that point.

Seventeen days later would be 19th or 20th November:

Transiting Moon has moved to 20° Scorpio, conjunct original 3rd Lord Mercury - contact is made, probably by you.

However, Mercury is also original 12th Lord - there may be something hidden or unknown to you, or you lose something in making the contact; it may not necessarily be a material loss.

Transiting Venus, 11th Lord, has moved to within range of trining original Moon - you feel there may be hope still and wish for the best.

Transiting Mercury, 3rd Lord, has just gone direct and is at 9° Scorpio, conjunct original Mars and Sun - contact is made with the other male party.

Transiting Mercury not combust or under beams - contact is comfortable, friendly and promising.

Transiting Saturn, 7th lord, has moved only 2° - his position, vis-à-vis this relationship, has not changed much.

Transiting Sun at 27° Scorpio conjuncts original Jupiter and trines original Asc and NN, but squares 7th Lord Saturn - he feels good about you, even likes you, but perhaps not in a romantic way.

Note that after Moon makes its trine, it will oppose original Mars, Sun, Venus, Mercury and Jupiter, all in Scorpio and in 4th and 5th houses - there may be a period of disappointment, heartbreak, moroseness, and even problems.


Well, Freedomlover, here's my wish for the best outcome for you!

Cheers!

[freedomlover]

Spica3,

Thank you so much for your generous post! I appreciate all of the time and effort you put into that. I feel that I got a mini horary lesson with this, as well. You explain yourself quite well.

As for feedback.... here goes.... Let me begin by saying this:
It seems that all of the horary posts I've ever made have dealt with the "big picture" or the underlying currents, instead of answering the question I've asked exactly. My tarot card readings always seemed to do this, as well... as if to say... "That is not what you need to know. THIS is what you need to know". I had wondered if it worked in horary astrology that way also. I was told that it did sometimes. It's interesting to note that in one of my questions I asked in August, several forum members said they had the intuitive impression that my move to where I wanted to go would come in connection with "a happy romance" or something like that. There was absolutely nothing said about anything like that in my question. I wasn't even interested at that time. I just wanted to be by myself. Then again in October, on the last horary I posted, Goca answered with something to do with "friends and lovers", even though the question had absolutely nothing to do with that.

Since I posted this question, I have been deluged with emotional "baggage" that needed healing. It seems that my step to even consider a relationship brought up everything I feared most. I have been sorting through, forgiving, and healing this old baggage for the last week or so. The interesting part is that the summation of all of this inner healing could be well described by the situation you described in your interpretation of this question!!!! Many of the words you used are the same I wrote in my journal. It's eerie, really. And it had to do with "Old Flame", that our "mutual friend" was concerned about. Could it be possible that the reading is saying that circmstances will not be favorable until this old baggage was dealt with??? I was taught by an expert tarot teacher that if you made different choices, that you would have to do another tarot reading, that that "shifted the energy" and opened up different avenues of opportunity. (kinda like those "multiple ending - choose your story" children's books) I can truly say I'm not the same person who originally posted this question. It's been that dramatic.

As far as I know, "D" is still unaware of my interest, as we have yet to be able to talk. It seems that keeps getting blocked. Mutual friend has been unable to reach him either. However, I DID get to talk with mutual friend, and he assured me that "D" would be favorably disposed towards me. He also stated that his original intention years ago when we first were introduced was to try to matchmake me and "D". He was thrilled to hear of my interest. I was able to straighten him out on "Old flame",as well. So that's settled.

It should be interesting to see how all of this pans out. I am also wondering if studying the chart of the time of our phone conversation in August would be of value. "D" and I had had zero contact for years, so it was like meeting him all over again. I never really knew him before anyway, but during this phone conversation, I started realizing how well we "clicked".

Also, I have absolutely no social life at all, so anything would be an improvement over that! I had not the intention of trying to drum up a romance, but just to try to start up a friendship and see where it goes. That may be the emphasis on the "friends" part in your interpretation.

My chart is in my signature. I don't have "D"s birth time, so I don't have an accurate chart for him. I just know his date of birth and approximate place of birth. Our synastry chart based on that is interesting though.

Thanks again to all of you for your help! Any further thoughts would be appreciated.

[Spica3]

Well, I'm glad you actually understand my babbling. And you're welcome, it was good practice. This chart is pretty straightforward.

Some charts are heavily one-sided, with all sorts of tentacles reaching everywhere. The querent just doggedly hopes against hope for something doomed to fail. That can make it difficult to explain.

It's clear from the chart that you're trying hard to be level-headed about this, although your feelings keep bursting through that lid you keep on it. But I can see your objective, rational side - must be your Sag Sun and Mercury, and Aqu Moon.

I'm just really concerned about the Moon coming up to that whole bunch of oppositions 13° later - about 2 weeks after the 19th.

It starts off with Mars - maybe an argument or spat, or ego issues.

Then it goes on to the Sun - 'pride and prejudice' issues might be a way to describe this one.

Next is Venus, original 11th Lord - all your hopes and dreams dashed, that romantic warm feeling totally gone, and the broken heart.

Next again is Mercury, Lord of 3rd and 12th - communication goes down the tubes, maybe another argument, and hidden, karmic issues coming to the surface, even the possibility of a therapy type situation…..the emotional baggage you mentioned?

Then, finally……whoa, I forgot Saturn and Neptune getting hit with squares.….oh dear me! Both Saturn (7th, 8th Lord) in 2nd and Neptune (9th co-Lord) in 8th being hit together would be serious relationship, self-esteem, psychological issues coming up - that's one rough patch there!

THEN, finally, it's Jupiter - taking responsibility for your inner well-being and your own healing, and learning spiritual and/or philosophical lessons for the future.

I'm afraid it's probably going to be a roller coaster ride. The good thing, if I can call it that, is that most of these phases, which come in quick succession, will mostly take place internally. Except for some 9th house issues.

Oh, one thing, do remember he's got nothing to do with any of this, i.e. he's not at fault.

What I'd probably do is lie very low and very quiet until the transits blow over. The whole thing lasts for 3 weeks or thereabouts.

Then re-establish contact again. Old-fashioned prim-and-proper me will always wait for the man to make the first move. That's SO romantic, I think. I always feel he could have issues of his own, and may not be ready for me if he doesn't call. But it's your relationship, so do what you feel like.

When you have your first real date later (and pick a good day for this), then you can do another chart - the Relationship Chart.

Btw, you can go ahead and contact him on the 19th, if you want. That should go okay.

Sorry, I didn't notice your birth chart till later. Took a quick look at it. When I have some time, I'll see what your progressed planets are saying. Might be some insights there.

Cheers!

[freedomlover]

Spica3,

Thanks again for your generosity in going over all of this.
Tough transits? Hmmm.... I guess time will tell. It's odd that everything you've described, even about the transits to come, describes exactly the healing process I've been going through. I wonder if somehow I've "gotten a step ahead" of the negative effects of the transits, so that they don't play out the way they seem to be saying? It certainly seems that I've been spiritually prepared for whatever these transits might entail. I don't know.... like I said, time will tell. I wonder, too, if this is something coming up with him? or "old flame"?

I didn't read this post until after I called him this evening to wish him Happy Birthday. Let's just say it went VERY well. So, the contact was made well before the 19th. This causes me to wonder if it doesn't have to do with something else. Also, are there alternative interpretations to what the transits could mean? I know sometimes aspects/transits can take many forms, depending on how the person deals with the energy.

Also, it was kind of a matter of necessity that I call him. I don't have my own phone, and have to use someone else's cell. I am not permitted to have people call me on this cell. I figured I could tell by how I was received if he wasn't ready for the call. If he isn't interested, he could have fooled me.

So, these transits begin around the first part of December? Two weeks after the 19th? That's near my birthday on the 28th of November. Hmmm....