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  #26  
Old 03-27-2011, 10:46 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Maybe water moons with aries mars? But pisces or cancers moon are not aggressive in an offensive sense, they are on the defensive side.

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Old 03-27-2011, 05:30 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I think a lot of fixed personal planets in the 12th house. Also, Libra/Scorpio people as they are so opposite of each other.
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  #28  
Old 03-28-2011, 11:36 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lithuel View Post
: I have Mars in Cancer in 9th, within a few minutes of being directly opposite Neptune i.
I can relate to this! My Neptune (1st house) is opposed to Mars (7th house). Whenever I feel hurt (e.g. during an argument) I tend to retire. This alone is often understood as passive aggression, because I have no energy to continue until the situation calms down. I think I got this aspect for a good reason as I need to learn how to fight back constructively and not just hide in my own world. I toughened up over the years and I hope that I became less passive aggressive.
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  #29  
Old 03-28-2011, 11:41 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

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Originally Posted by mahaira View Post
I toughened up over the years and I hope that I became less passive aggressive.
Would you mind sharing how you do this now? I think it's important. Not because "aggression" is something to be aspired to, "assertiveness" is, but because how we evolve against what we feel are difficult placements is commendable. It's so true when they say it's "the natal promise". It doesn't have to be the "natal sentence".
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  #30  
Old 03-29-2011, 04:00 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

[QUOTE=virgo18;265605]
Quote:
Originally Posted by SagiCap View Post
A Libra Mars is like a slow burning, inactive but seething volcano of massive destruction. lol!

Mars isn't "home" in Libra, it's home in Aries - the exact opposite of Libra.

Some characteristics I have with this placement are:

Choosing battles carefully or wisely.
Detest arguing over BS and nonsense that doesn't even matter, triviality.
Arguing with someone who doesn't matter to me.
Ability to ignore situations that are not deemed "worthy" of my anger.
If I care about someone and something they've done is bothering me, I weigh all possible angles, maybe they didn't mean it - I tell them really calmly what my issue is (even if I'm angry as hell), and just see what they have to say.
If I see they start getting angry, I tell them to chill and we'll talk later

My mars is almost in Libra... 29 of virgo

I have much of that characteristics
I have Mars in Libra and in the 8th of hidden matters. I do champion the underdog for sure and it sure to get me really angry to see injustice.
I dont really have a temper or not physically violent much preferring to negotiate and to see all sides of the picture.....it upsets my equilibrium to see aggression and violence and that may be because Neptune is in exact conjunction...I can be nice even when I feel anger and that is probably not good.
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  #31  
Old 03-30-2011, 03:13 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Mars RETROGRADE in natal chart = passive aggression par excellence

Quote:
Originally Posted by astrologer50
Mars Retrograde
* reconsiders before expressing anger
* finds competitive situations hard to handle
* tends to repress and so ....
* can become depressed
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  #32  
Old 03-30-2011, 09:25 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Quote:
Originally Posted by SagiCap View Post
Would you mind sharing how you do this now? I think it's important. Not because "aggression" is something to be aspired to, "assertiveness" is, but because how we evolve against what we feel are difficult placements is commendable. It's so true when they say it's "the natal promise". It doesn't have to be the "natal sentence".
Dear SagiCap,

Iím sorry for not responding sooner. Iíve just seen your question. I really need to learn how to use my account better!

I hope this interpretation will help a bit.

I feel that the Neptuneís placement in my 1st house is, at least partially, responsible for the idealistic approach I tend to have. And this can be a burden for others in a passive way.
To be more precise, I prefer equilibrium and usually retreat from arguments, any sort of confrontation for that matter. I mistakenly take the word idealism for unrealism My self-confidence is not very strong (Saturn-Sun conjunction, Moon in Virgo) and maybe I donít think that Iím tough enough.
The inequality bothers me on such a deep level that even when I donít want to, I ďmoderateĒ banal, everyday conversations, so that all parties could be heard (you know those unpleasant situations, when someone tries to say something and is interrupted? Well, I have the need to help him say what he wants).
Anyway, the fact that Iím faced with the opposition Neptune-Mars in my relationship to others (most notably my husband) makes me deal with my inability to engage in a healthy confrontation, because it happens to me on daily basis.
I know that what Iím about to say borders to verbal abuse (Mars in Gemini in 7th), but I did go through situations where I was constantly yelled at and sometimes unjustly accused. My only reaction used to be not to react but to retreat in my own world and pain (how neptunian of me), thus provoking even more negative response. What I didnít understand is that my inability to get over the fact that I didnít like the way we communicate, prevented me from ever having the opportunity to say so to others and change things! I would just cave in until the other side came and apologized for his rudeness. I was pressuring him to do so literarily by doing nothing! I was making him feel terrible by not even saying a word. Heíd just have to look at my empty face and often feel guilty for all the wrong reasons.
The problem was that very often, when heís not just blowing off steam, being a nervous Mars in Gemini, he does make some good points about how I should force myself into jumping into water than just observing the life from a safe distance.
I caught myself that I was unintentionally using this principle to get something I wanted (Iím not the least bit proud of that). Sheer kind pressure. But there was a price to pay because for everything I gained in this way. I had to ďpayĒ by suffering verbal/mental aggression from the other side, sooner or later.
To make one thing clear. Iím not saying that verbal abuse was my fault. And Iím not saying that all people who suffer because of it, should do as I do. Reasons are different for everyone.

When I understood this passive aggressive mechanism, I knew I had to change, but it wasnít easy. What used to hurt me before, hurts still. I just grew enough to be able to face the pain and deal with it. On a more practical level, I ďspentĒ all the tears. Instead of sad face now I try to stand up for myself. The worst thing at the beginning was that I didnít like the fact that I had to use my ďenemyísĒ weapons. I didnít want to be someone Iíve never wanted to become. Oppositions tend to work that way, we go to extremes. So, I started yelling too and even threw a book once or twice (that was unimaginable for me). Now I try to find the middle and not hide, but respond in a constructive manner. Deal with pain and not fantasize about a better life that doesnít exist, but rather try to build it for real. I must say that I feel more fulfilled; even though itís something I still fight for and doesnít come easy to me. And the heavy energy coming from the other side (Mars) has subsided. Instead it can even be creative and stimulating.

I too donít think that we are born to suffer our life away, but learn. I understand that the natal aspects are a gift for life, but I think that even the heavy ones can be manageable if one is willing to grow. I canít say that I was all that willing, I had no choice.

p.s. Iím writing a post on ďblessings in disguiseĒ about heavy aspects that can actually work well in our charts. Iím trying to include (and well organize) as much info as I can. For some reason, now I feel that itís importantÖ
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  #33  
Old 04-05-2011, 10:54 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Too better understand where to look for passive aggressive traits in a chart, look at the root causes.

I can happily use my chart as an example.

I have an explosive temperment with Mars square Pluto in my natal chart, BUT I also have a Saturn/Sun square which lead to inferiority issues. These two combine for the classic passive aggressive person. Angry and seething with rage but trying to bury it because of not feeling like it's okay to be angry. This leads to trying extremely hard to NOT be angry towards other people, but of course, being human, I DO get angry. Add to this a diplomatic and ever bending Libra Asc you have someone that will do anything to get their point across and at the same time try to maintain a 'nice guy/gal' image.

Understanding the psychology behind a character trait helps immensely with locating the trait in a chart.
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  #34  
Old 04-06-2011, 08:16 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Mine is a true classic case...Pisces mars...but opposed to Sun Jupiter conjuction and trine Scorpio moon. I seethe the same very way, but some times I have real trouble keeping it in and I can explode and even suprise my self.
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  #35  
Old 04-07-2011, 01:56 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

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Originally Posted by Idrew View Post
Mine is a true classic case...Pisces mars...but opposed to Sun Jupiter conjuction and trine Scorpio moon. I seethe the same very way, but some times I have real trouble keeping it in and I can explode and even suprise my self.
I do the same. Though over the last four months it's not been a problem at all which is very nice for me as I've dedicated a great deal of time to sorting this nasty little issue out.
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  #36  
Old 04-10-2011, 04:37 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Seems to me that different people view the term "passive-aggressive" in a different light. Someone mentioned agression bottled up. To me, that is different than passive-aggression.

I see passive aggression as a control mechanism to "get back" at others who the person holds a resentment towards. The person doesn't have the guts to come out and say, "Hey, I'm bothered about something you said or did" and just get it out and over with. A passive-aggressive uses subtle, sometimes overt, digs and jabs - either verbally or through sneaky subversive behaviors, to limit the other person in some way.

It is a vile trait, when all is said and done, because the little resentments don't go away, they are kept fed by behaviors acted in some sort with some sort of relatiation in mind. It is the ultimate character trade for the word "COWARD."
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  #37  
Old 04-18-2011, 06:28 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I have Mars in Libra and I would say I have a temper and I almost always show it on my face. Other people have told me this too lol. I try not to be passive aggressive, but I don't really like to fight unless it's worthwhile. Otherwise I just like to sweep it under the rug, but I do get mad secretly. But if it is important, I will confront the person, usually in a nice way, and that usually gets the job done.

I've read that Mars in Libra is one of the most passive aggressive placements in astrology. I suppose it's because our instinct is to not fight or cause confrontation, but it's humanly impossible to not feel angry and upset when certain things happen, thus rendering us "passive aggressive."
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  #38  
Old 04-18-2011, 06:59 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Well I have been doing a bit of research on mars and martial arts. Many of the MMA champions researched had mars in the so called passive sings of cancer, virgo, libra and some even in pisces. In nearly all of the cases mars was strengthened by an aspect to the sun, uranus or jupiter. I tend to believe more that aspects make the strong mars.
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  #39  
Old 04-18-2011, 07:56 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Mars and Venus in Virgo in 12 house, ascendant and Sun in Libra. A perfect receipie for passive aggressiveness.
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  #40  
Old 06-05-2011, 12:18 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I think it has to do with a bad connection between Mars, Neptune, and maybe Saturn.

Connections with pluto may also work on that because, passive aggression most of the time is planned. And people with strong-bad connections of pluto tend to plan their attacks, for doing them in a discrete, but acid way.

I agree. My own experience has had me have passive aggression with guys who are Pisces/Neptune influenced. Even if they are in traditionally "strong signs" (ie Air or Fire) they have a strong Neptune and it equals passive city. I dated a double Sag with Mars in Pisces it was TERRIBLE. Plus he had Venus and Mercury in Scorp so he would be angry and just shut you out. While acting like everything was ok (he had a Virgo Rising).

I also dated an Aqua with Aries Mars...BUT the only time he would take action against anything was in regards to opinions and action towards protecting his family or country (he was a Cap rising with Mars loosely Conjunct his IC=patriotic). He was passive in regards to dating, and if you made him angry (or hurt him) instead of telling you or confronting the issue he would just bury his head in the sand and again avoid you. Or if you confronted him, he would just be a jerk and be mean to you. He had Neptune conjunct his Asc, Neptune Conjunct his Venus, Venus in the 12th, and Pisces Mercury.
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  #41  
Old 06-05-2011, 07:27 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I have Mars conjoined Sun in the 12th house, Virgo. My aggression is hidden from view ...
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  #42  
Old 06-05-2011, 08:46 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Quote:
Originally Posted by kakasya View Post
When mars or saturn meets the explosive north node.

kakasya
I have personal experience with an x partner to back up this statement with saturn mars and north node together in 12th house in aries. This person would get mad at me and disappear for hours or days (in the middle of a date or for a whole weekend) then come back and tell me how I should have known what I did wrong when they first disappeared. Very passive aggressive and I had to always wait and wonder what I did wrong?

FYI my experience with passive agressive mars ranked in order of most damaging passive aggressive to least (in my humble opinion)

That is a mars in gemini is really a tough customer to beat when they decide to be passive aggressive

Mars in gemini = two-faced, self-protective, too cool for school
Mara in leo = teasing turns into shaming in order to feel like an equal, but its all a joke after all!
Mars in Scorpio = any weapon is fair game!
Mars in libra = soft attack, won't ever be openly confrontational
Mars in cancer = emotional attack (unthinking actions later revealed for what they are)
Mars in virgo = extreme self-doubt causes pathetic jibes instead of actual confrontation

That's all for now. I know mars in cancer is not an easy placement, but most mars in cancers will cough up what they are feeling eventually in my humble estimation. As for mars in virgo, as someone with this placement, I can be passive aggressive, but not really successful at it and I prefer confrontation.

Last edited by Rushwing; 06-05-2011 at 08:48 AM.
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  #43  
Old 06-06-2011, 09:39 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rushwing View Post
I have personal experience with an x partner to back up this statement with saturn mars and north node together in 12th house in aries. This person would get mad at me and disappear for hours or days (in the middle of a date or for a whole weekend) then come back and tell me how I should have known what I did wrong when they first disappeared. Very passive aggressive and I had to always wait and wonder what I did wrong?

FYI my experience with passive agressive mars ranked in order of most damaging passive aggressive to least (in my humble opinion)

That is a mars in gemini is really a tough customer to beat when they decide to be passive aggressive

Mars in gemini = two-faced, self-protective, too cool for school
Mara in leo = teasing turns into shaming in order to feel like an equal, but its all a joke after all!
Mars in Scorpio = any weapon is fair game!
Mars in libra = soft attack, won't ever be openly confrontational
Mars in cancer = emotional attack (unthinking actions later revealed for what they are)
Mars in virgo = extreme self-doubt causes pathetic jibes instead of actual confrontation

That's all for now. I know mars in cancer is not an easy placement, but most mars in cancers will cough up what they are feeling eventually in my humble estimation. As for mars in virgo, as someone with this placement, I can be passive aggressive, but not really successful at it and I prefer confrontation.
I have mars in gemini and am NOT two faced
I have found mars in cancer will 'interfer' with family matters whether it was asked or not though. Remember planets are modified by signs, where they express are houses and how they express are *aspects*
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  #44  
Old 06-06-2011, 01:56 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Hey guys,

I was actually just thinking, I opted for an assertiveness training one-day course through my work training. I'm going at the end of this month and I'd be happy to share the most important parts/practical tips on this thread if anyone thinks it's something they want to know. Or maybe you should pm me if interested?

S
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  #45  
Old 06-06-2011, 08:04 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I think Passive Aggressive has alot more to do with other things than just mars placement in my case.

im a gem, libra rising, 8th H Gemini mars venus sun & blackmoon, 9th H moon Cancer

I love school on my own terms lol thats my sun+mercury+mars

I will be passive (go along) at times to keep the peace (libra rising), but i am always up front speak my feelings (my truth aka tell it like it is) & you can take it or leave it, you get to choose; (moon cancer+gemini mars&sun)
Never to-faced cause im not afraid to hurt your feelings or mine. Not afraid of confrontation but i do like peace more.

Very self-protective, (from childhood environment) & if i dont do it, Who Will?

However, i will emotionally attack you if you are straight up lying, or being very cruel to whoever.

I can put you to death with my tounge (sp?) which i think mars has fueled or is to blame; heck i dont want the blame for it, its horrible! Sadly effective in some cases, but absolutely horrible ..... i hate that part of me, really do.

Some one who dissapears from you and leaves you guessing?

Well from my experience, i would ask them to question themselves about whether or not they sincerely want to be with you, & question their maturity level, and what they are avoiding. (whether its a habit learned & repeated from childhood, manipulation tactics, or a matter of the above).

Assertiveness, i dont have a problem being assertive in its appropriate place and time, just thought that was common with everyone, but maybe its the mars in me

SagiCap,
I would be interested out of curiousity about what this class on assertiveness teaches you if you take it and your willing to share. You can PM me if you like.

Tanya
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  #46  
Old 06-06-2011, 09:08 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

I've been called passive aggressive, and I admit to it. Emphasized by my Moon in Scorpio probably, but my Mars in Taurus is the major culprit... well, my misuse of Mars in Taurus is the culprit. I wouldn't want to blame the placement for that. However, Grant Lewi pointed at the placement...

Quote:
From Astrology for the Millions by Grant Lewi

Mars in Taurus -

You are a master of the art of passive aggression and passive resistance; whether your habits are right or wrong...you keep plowing along in the same furrow, and those who would oppose you generally stand to one side or get mowed down.
I feel that this interpretation is accurate in my case, and probably manifests this way often. I don't see the trait so much in the other Mars signs that have been mentioned... maybe Cancer.
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  #47  
Old 06-07-2011, 01:02 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Anything LIBRA or Pisces, Id say. (Ive never seen Virgo energy be passive aggressive... passive, YES, but not really the one to get back at anyone in any way.)

Mars in Pisces is pretty passive/aggressive.

My father is a Libra Sun, Pisces Mars ---- I love him dearly, but just guess how passive aggressive he is.................

You dont wanna know!

Last edited by Ixaee; 06-07-2011 at 01:07 AM.
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  #48  
Old 06-17-2011, 01:14 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

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Originally Posted by SpadeCharade View Post
I have Mars in Libra and I would say I have a temper and I almost always show it on my face. Other people have told me this too lol. I try not to be passive aggressive, but I don't really like to fight unless it's worthwhile. Otherwise I just like to sweep it under the rug, but I do get mad secretly. But if it is important, I will confront the person, usually in a nice way, and that usually gets the job done.

I've read that Mars in Libra is one of the most passive aggressive placements in astrology. I suppose it's because our instinct is to not fight or cause confrontation, but it's humanly impossible to not feel angry and upset when certain things happen, thus rendering us "passive aggressive."
My Mars is in Libra as well... and I tend to bottle my anger up until I explode. But it leaks out in passive aggressive ways. People say I lash out at undeserving people when I get angry. Or vent my problems by using analogy when the person I'm mad at is around without actually confronting them. Only when I get extremely angry, or if I've been under a lot of stress do I actually express my anger. And usually, it is NOT pretty.

I admire you for having the ability to confront people in a nice way. I tend to go the, it's easier to ask for forgiveness route.

I've also found myself indirectly talking venting my frustration on social network sites where I know the person who is the target of my anger will see. It's pretty shallow, and if I become aware of it, I try to stop.

On the other hand, I seem to have an uncanny knack for being able to say whatever I want when I'm truly angry and end up healing the situation by destroying it first.

While I can be very passive aggressive, and I can also be meticulously manipulative in a very aware manner, the two seldom meet. The passive aggression is usually on accident, while the manipulation is usually for good (or what I deem as good) rather than mal-intent.
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  #49  
Old 06-17-2011, 07:51 PM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Quote:
Originally Posted by SagiCap View Post
A Libra Mars is like a slow burning, inactive but seething volcano of massive destruction. lol!

Mars isn't "home" in Libra, it's home in Aries - the exact opposite of Libra.

Some characteristics I have with this placement are:

Choosing battles carefully or wisely.
Detest arguing over BS and nonsense that doesn't even matter, triviality.
Arguing with someone who doesn't matter to me.
Ability to ignore situations that are not deemed "worthy" of my anger.
If I care about someone and something they've done is bothering me, I weigh all possible angles, maybe they didn't mean it - I tell them really calmly what my issue is (even if I'm angry as hell), and just see what they have to say.
If I see they start getting angry, I tell them to chill and we'll talk later

The positive side of Mars in Libra is someone who roots for the underdog, is not argumentative, weighs every side to an issue, thinks before acting, wants to compromise instead of "winning", doesn't have much of a temper, puts others first

and that's only the good stuff ...

And now the not-so good stuff - the stuff you were asking about

The negative side is yes, because of all this underlying unexpressed anger, they can be very passive aggressive, can bottle their anger or anything that isn't pleasant for a loooong time, run from conflict, not see that they can be wrong. If something is perceived as "unjust" to them - something that hurts them, they are literally plotting that person's demise . Mars in Libra can dream up ways to take back the "fairness" and make things seem right again but hardly act on it quickly. If really angry - and they get to that threshold, they can blow up like a volcano.

it depends on the person as to which side they express. it also depends on the aspects mars makes, its house position, the position of venus (mars ruler here), as well as the rest of the chart.
I am Mars in Libra at my job I'm very quite and don't argue so much, because boss is the boss and I have to show some respect. But in my emotional relationships, friends, family, love... I'm very frontal, and assertive. I don't run from a argue, I'm the one who causes them. (and i think I don't have aspects between mars that make me this way... but the truth is this... I'm always create confusion around me and I alwways want to be right... silly, but i'm being honest...
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Old 06-22-2011, 08:32 AM
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Re: Passive Aggression

Mars in cancer poorly aspected...I feel it like Mars retro....it only conjunct Sun 6 degree orb.....
the Sun gets an opposition from Neptune.....
I don't know if it affect Mars when it conjunct Sun.....
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