Help with Mother

[velocity3d]

My mothers birth-date 02/06/1959 4:40am 89:09w 42:27 N Rockford, Illinois.


I'm not so much seeking interpretation as I am understanding of personality issues that I am already aware of. I'd like to know if there is any indication of these in her chart. Anything glaringly obvious that I am missing. I'd consider myself maybe intermediate with Astrology, I'm hoping maybe someone with much more understanding of Astrology can look at this for me.
My mother is an abusive woman with a history of addictive behaviors. First Alcohol and for the last few years due to her "health complaints" Rx painkillers are her new drug of choice. She is a compulsive liar, she is paranoid and delusional, she constantly thinks other people are talking about her or judging her even when there is absolutely no truth in it. She never ever ever admits fault for anything. She screams at the first hint of anger and gets angry VERY easily. She is also VERY manipulative and easily convinces people that she is just a sweet frail innocent person. She also has another side of her personality that can be very loving and good. She is a wonderful grandmother. Some people would never believe she is also all those bad things.


One aspect that I am very interested in, in her chart is:
Sun in Aquarius 2nd house Opposed Uranus in Leo 8th house


My inquiry is also two fold. Recently my mother was diagnosed with vulvar cancer. Prior to this she was diagnosed with Lyme Disease in 2002. The vulvar cancer is a type of skin cancer. She has lied about many of the details regarding this but the fact that she does have it remains as I was with her when she went to the doctors. Chemo and radiation will start next week.
Now I suppose this next part will sound slightly hokey but take it for what it is. A couple times in my life I have felt death somewhere, prior to a person actually dying. I used to clean houses and upon entering a new house once I told my partner that I felt like death was in the house with us. Just 2 months later the lady of that house developed a massive tumor in her chest and died within a week. Another time when I was much younger this happened with my great grandmother.
Shortly after my mother was diagnosed I was sitting at her house with her and I felt the EXACT SAME feeling. All I can describe it as is like a hovering darkness.
Please if anyone can help, don't pull any punches. I love my mother and at the same time I am very weary of her abuse and lies and manipulations. I will be her primary caregiver during this process and I care for her with love and understanding and I hide my frustrations from her. I know better than to confront her for her lies - her attacks are vicious when she is defending herself.



For my own well being in this process I need to know:
If her personality disorders are shown in her chart
If there is any indication as to how this cancer situation will play out
Does anyone see death from this in this chart


In case it is helpful I am January 27 1976 at 9:30 am same city and lat and long
Any - ANY help at all is so very much appreciated



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Extra Note:
I am NOT asking anyone to predict "death". I am only asking if there are factors in the chart that correspond with her recent illness and may indicate death - as in aspects that were possibly noted by Llewellyn George.
If it helps so that you are able to help me with this, just pretend she is already dead and answer if the chart shows this illness playing a factor in that.
Also I am aware that it appears she may have Borderline Personality Disorder. I know what her problems are, I am asking if in anyone elses opinion they are indicated in the chart.
Most importantly I'd like to know the significance of the aspect I pointed out. (Sun in Aquarius 2nd house Opposed Uranus in Leo 8th house)

[velocity3d]

Bumping this. I have been at the library and researched and researched this. I would really really appreciate just a bit of advice in regards to this sun opposed Uranus aspect. I'd love to hear another take on this. I realize it's not the standard, will I find love issue - but it is of the utmost importance to me. Thanks in advance.

[waybread]

Can you post your mother's chart? I would take her birthdate to be February 6, but the US and other countries reverse the day and month order.

I don't discount your feelings of near-death. It is not uncommon. Consequently, see what you can do to help your mother get her affairs in order. Do what you can to make your time together now as loving as you can manage it.

Your mother would seem to be suffering from a mental illness. You cannot change her or your childhood, but in knowing more about the demons with which she struggled, you can develop more insights and compassion for her behaviours.

[velocity3d]

Waybread,
Thank you for your reply.
Yes her birth-month is February
February 6th 1959 4:40am 89:09w 42:27 N Rockford, Illinois.

I look forward to any help available.

[waybread]

Your mother has a tough chart! She has a configuration called a grand square, in which 4 planets are linked by squares and oppositions (Jupiter, Pluto, Mars, and Venus.) The Mars/Pluto square is the most troublesome and may account for her temper and need to be 'right" at all costs. But with a grand square, if something reactivates one planet, the whole lot get reactivated together. People can overcome these challenges, but it is hard for people who have not been encouraged to seek therapy or find a spiritual coping mechanism.

Although it is wide, she also has Neptune square sun. The hard sun/Neptune aspects are often found in the charts of people who have alcohol or drug problems. The sun is one's sense of identity, and Neptune tends to erase or dissolve what it touches. Chiron in this mix suggests she has struggled all her life with self-esteem problems. This pattern is reinforced by Neptune square moon, which may explain frequent volatility in her moods. In which sometimes the best defense is a good offense.

Lying looks to be Mercury square Neptune. Neptune is not about reality, but about imagination, illusions, and disillusionment. The god Mercury in his mythology was a trickster who told lies during his youth, and Mercury rules lying as well as one's thinking and communicating abilities.

Uranus opposite sun may give her a perfect fear of disruptive or self-liberating people whom she cannot predict and control. The incorrigible people don't have to be objectively Uranian, she just has to experience them in that way. With Mercury involved in this opposition, something like a bipolar disorder seems possible.

She has a very strong Saturn in its own sign of Capricorn right on her ascendant. Is she physically small or slender? It's not badly aspected, and this may account for your mother, as she ages, actually showing some of the benefits of old age, as in her grandparenting.

So even though a daughter cannot help but personalize her mother's harmful behaviour (ask me how I know!) I think it should be helpful to realize that her chart is a difficult one for anyone to live out as everybody's sweetheart.

I am not into death predictions (as per my comments on other threads on this board) but just now your mother has Pluto sitting right on her ascendant. Pluto conjunct ascendant is a hard time for people. It can make them prone to phobias (including, of going outside) and physically I wonder if she is having additional problems with Saturn-ruled systems such as bones, teeth, or hair. Skin cancer (is this on the vulva?) seems very consistent with this transit. Your mother may be thinking about death now, whether or not she lives long after this transit passes.

Transiting Saturn is just now sitting on her north node. If there is anything your mother would like to complete or accomplish in her life before she passes, see what you can do to help her. (Don't expect her to to "go quietly into that good night," however--she looks to be too feisty for that!)

You seem like a good and caring daughter. Your mother is lucky to have you.

Have you done some synastry with your mother? This would be helpful to show exact points of conflict and harmony with her.

[velocity3d]

Waybread,

I've actually just been trying to figure out how to do Synastry and Composite and Relationship charts. I use a free program called Astrolog - which I've used since I started fiddling with learning Astrology 'Many Moons Ago'. It has probably been a decade at least and there is still sooooo much I have not learned or figured out. Recently I think I've had this '30 year return' and I have started really working hard at this and prioritizing other areas of life.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for looking at this for me. Honestly you are due a good Kharmic return for this one - as I can't tell you how hard this situation is on me and how terribly I've struggled to find anyone who could help me just a little in getting some understanding. You have been the ONE person so far and I appreciate it more than I have words for.

She has a very strong Saturn in its own sign of Capricorn right on her ascendant. Is she physically small or slender? It's not badly aspected, and this may account for your mother, as she ages, actually showing some of the benefits of old age, as in her grandparenting.

My mother is 4'10. She is literally almost classified as a dwarf - lol. That sort of validation of your interpretation speaks volumes. I find the later part of this interesting too as she is 100% a different person in regards to grand-parenting than she was to actually parenting. I was placed in foster homes as a child because of her alcoholism and abuse. Yet now my children have never once experienced her wrath. She is trying hard to make up for what she did to me, with them. Which may also play a part in what you said:

If there is anything your mother would like to complete or accomplish in her life before she passes, see what you can do to help her.

and physically I wonder if she is having additional problems with Saturn-ruled systems such as bones, teeth, or hair. Skin cancer (is this on the vulva?) seems very consistent with this transit. Your mother may be thinking about death now, whether or not she lives long after this transit passes.

Yes, it is skin cancer. The vulva is the "female parts" and her cancer is on the skin there. It makes up only 2% of all Cancers. She is thinking about death a lot now and the thing is I believe she is going to be the one to kill herself.

The Radiologist himself told us that in his experience people who have faith and surround themselves with positivity do better than those who don't. My mother is negative about 98% of the time. It's almost like she is asking death to come in and have coffee. She thinks and talks of NOTHING but the cancer. All day every day to the point that she is driving us all a little nuts. She also wants everyone else to think about it constantly - she even told the gas station attendants by where we live about it. She has called 3rd cousins to tell them. She is addicted to the sympathy and is also so busy feeling sorry for herself that she isn't bringing in any good energy at all. She is Christian and even visits from her pastor haven't done anything except feed more into her sympathy addiction. I can't get her out of it.

I 100% in my heart believe that if she does die it will be her that killed herself and not the cancer. I believe the cancer would be cured but I believe it has to be a mind/body/soul medicine and she is not participating in curing.

Uranus opposite sun may give her a perfect fear of disruptive or self-liberating people whom she cannot predict and control. The incorrigible people don't have to be objectively Uranian, she just has to experience them in that way. With Mercury involved in this opposition, something like a bipolar disorder seems possible.

I was thinking something along these lines myself and I believe that I may actually be that person to her. If I am not going along with everything she says she considers me prime #1 opponent. I was discussing this aspect with my Husband last night and I felt it almost seems as if it rips her personality apart. Bipolar or Borderline personality disorders are fitting.

Figuring out her chart and it's relationship to my own and our history will be important in my process of learning Astrology. (Jan 27, 1976 9:54 pm - I wrote the wrong time in my first post) My sun is also in Aquarius and there has always been such strong energy between us - both very very good and very very bad that if Astrology be accurate it MUST show in these charts. Of course I already believe it is accurate but I am a scientist at heart and I am always looking for more pieces to the puzzle, more clues.

Again - I just want you to know that I appreciate this more than I can express. This may be the most difficult time in my life and I was searching for a kind soul to just help me understand a little more. This has been a true blessing and it means so much to me. Thank you thank you thank you!

[waybread]

Gosh, thanks, velocity. You made my day. Thank you for your trust. Astrology is my passion and I try to be helpful, but I have many days when I question my abilities at it. Be sure to let me know when I miss the mark, though, because that is how I learn.

I don't have a good feel for karma, but I will say there is a New Age theory that souls choose to incarnate together, because each soul is working on particular themes or issues in our earthly laboratory. They agree to work with individuals most likely to further their spiritual growth. This plan does not necessarily put their lives in a happy or easy trajectory, but on a track for learning and teaching. You and your mothers' flight plans show some really interesting correspondences.

I use two ways to compare charts. One (basic synastry) just puts the two natal charts side by side (or overlapping) and looks for aspects between pairs of planets. The sun, moon, and ascendant are important places to start. Notably in your situation, the moon symbolizes both one's feelings, and also one's mother and sense of home. Another one uses a composite chart, which is a single chart of the relationship in which the data are averaged.

Starting with the synastry that really pops out, is that your own moon, Venus, and IC (cusp of the 4th house of early childhood conditioning and home) conjunct your mother's Saturn conjunct ascendant! Wow. So some people might just walk away from an abusive mother and cut off contact with her, but this is not possible for you. No matter how badly she behaved, you know she is your mother, and always will be. With Venus in the mix, you love her deeply, despite the emotional scarring you feel.

Then without ever meaning to, your Moon/Venus reactivates Mom's Saturn. This can do a couple of things. You may--totally inadvertently--ring Mom's "I'm inadequate" chimes, because Saturn can show where and how we feel inadequate and not good enough. Saturn is also the stern disciplinarian, and physical abuse you experienced might have come from a sort of twisted belief that she was disciplining you. Then off you went to foster care, deepening Mom's inner torment that there is something wrong with her. So she feels resentful, back you come, and the cycle repeats.

Your sun conjuncts your mother's moon (her mothering nature), reinforcing the pattern. Your Uranus squares her sun. Without your meaning to, she may have the feeling of being blind-sided by you.

I wonder, did she ever criticize you as being too emotionally clingy and needy? With your own moon and Venus in Capricorn and sun in Aquarius, you come from a place of considerable emotional detachment and restraint, yet all little children need their mothers!

Then the Pluto transit just now hitting your mother's ascendant/Saturn, is also activating your own moon/Venus/IC. So just as mother is dealing with her body (BTW, Pluto is the modern ruler of sex organs), you are having to deal with all kinds of mother issues.

I think your ambivalence about your mother is shown by a quincunx from moon/Venus to Saturn. This aspect (150 degrees) gives an uneasy feeling that is hard to resolve. Saturn asks you to do your duty, even when it is a big emotional hardship.

Just a couple of things about your own chart. You have Uranus square sun; comparable in some ways to your mother's Uranus opposite sun. This is a highly charged aspect, that frequently does lead to power struggles in inter-personal relations. Were you a very willful child? This aspect suggests that you are constantly chafing at restrictions. Fortunately, with Pluto trine sun, you are an opening for positive transformation in your life.

You also don't mention whether you have siblings. You have a formation called a "kite" that points to Neptune in your third house. The third is all about communications, but it includes one's neighbourhood, siblings, and short-distance travel. If you have siblings, how did they fit into the family mix? I would read this kite as your developing a spiritual way of thinking, whether or not you subscribe to any conventional religion.

Mercury and sun closely opposed by Saturn may make you feel anxious or sad and confer self-confidence issues, but you seem to have a huge heart, and the emotional resources to cope with real difficulties. With Jupiter conjunct Chiron in the "house of open enemies", you have an amazing capacity to develop wisdom from the hurts you have experienced in your life.

So I doubt that Mom is going to change her ways, but one thing you can do is just let her talk. No need to reply or jolly her up. If her condition worsens, she may simply need to express her fears.

And please just realize that you are attracting good energy, as well, by being available for your mother, to help her; no matter how her inner demons express themselves.

I'll get back on your composite chart.

[waybread]

Velocity, I just ran some composite charts for you. If you're not familiar with the free charts calulator at Astrodienst (www.astro.com ) I highly recommend it.

They were unbelievably positive. I couldn't believe it. The one harsh aspect that constantly popped up is moon/Saturn--unsurprisingly. Mothering/being mothered in connection with feelings of inadequacy and despondency. The midpoint composite also showed a lot of sesqui-squares from Pluto, suggesting a kind of ruthless, power-struggle energy infiltrating the relationship, but I have to say that if these were charts for a couple contemplating marriage, the signs would look really positive.

So what gives? Possibly astrology is wrong. Possibly I have the chart-reading skills of a gnat, but then I don't make up the blue (harmonious) and red (difficult) aspect lines on the Astrodienst horoscopes.

Possibly the New Age thesis is correct, that your and your mother's souls are operating at a level that does not so closely parallel a mundane level.

Even if astrology or my abilities are completely bogus, I think the common sense approach is to suggest that you are doing the right thing. Whether Mom's cancer is terminal or she lives to be 100, the main thing is that you can look at your own life and feel you did the best you could for her, especially when she needed someone, gritchiness and all.

I just hope you are also looking after yourself. After a rough day with Mom, hopefully you can do something nice for yourself. This might be some kind of Uranian serendipity effect, where you try something new and wonderful. You deserve it.

With all good wishes, W.

[velocity3d]

I'll just respond to both your last posts together - hopefully it doesn't get too muddled.

Gosh, thanks, velocity. You made my day. Thank you for your trust. Astrology is my passion and I try to be helpful, but I have many days when I question my abilities at it. Be sure to let me know when I miss the mark, though, because that is how I learn.

As of now I do not believe you have missed your mark yet. I'm going through again now as I post this reply and so I will note anything iffy. I agree, we all learn through our mistakes and you are helping me immensely.

I don't have a good feel for karma, but I will say there is a New Age theory that souls choose to incarnate together, because each soul is working on particular themes or issues in our earthly laboratory. They agree to work with individuals most likely to further their spiritual growth. This plan does not necessarily put their lives in a happy or easy trajectory, but on a track for learning and teaching. You and your mothers' flight plans show some really interesting correspondences.

I 100% believe this new age theory. I think that is where some of my calm in regards to this issue comes from. This is also another reason I am so desperately seeking understanding of the issues. I do believe this was all intended for her and I both to learn from in this lifetime and although at times it has been terribly painful I find real reassurance from the belief that there is a purpose to it and on a soul level this is what I wanted and needed. I guess when I really think about why I wanted these charts reviewed so badly that is the bottom line. I knew in my heart that there was this purpose - but I wanted it confirmed and to understand the direction. Wanted to know for sure that things were going as planned. If so I am completely OK with all of it. What doesn't kill me, I will learn from.

Which brings me to something else that really hit home with what you said:

Mercury and sun closely opposed by Saturn may make you feel anxious or sad and confer self-confidence issues, but you seem to have a huge heart, and the emotional resources to cope with real difficulties. With Jupiter conjunct Chiron in the "house of open enemies", you have an amazing capacity to develop wisdom from the hurts you have experienced in your life.

One thing I have said over and over to my children and believe myself is that in every conflict you have to search for what you can learn from it. I mean I literally say those words often.

Starting with the synastry that really pops out, is that your own moon, Venus, and IC (cusp of the 4th house of early childhood conditioning and home) conjunct your mother's Saturn conjunct ascendant! Wow. So some people might just walk away from an abusive mother and cut off contact with her, but this is not possible for you. No matter how badly she behaved, you know she is your mother, and always will be. With Venus in the mix, you love her deeply, despite the emotional scarring you feel.

Again this is incredibly accurate. The people in my life aside from my mother who are close to me have said on more than one occasion that they don't understand why I don't walk away from her. Can't say how many times I've heard "If it was anyone else they would cut her out". You are also correct in the last part - There have been times that we were separated and it was heartbreaking. I love her in the way that a person loves their child - unconditionally. Though I have huge difficulty in forgiving her for her wrongs. Mostly because she never truly accepts accountability. One day I will have to let these things go and find a way to forgive - I know this - regardless of her.

Then without ever meaning to, your Moon/Venus reactivates Mom's Saturn. This can do a couple of things. You may--totally inadvertently--ring Mom's "I'm inadequate" chimes, because Saturn can show where and how we feel inadequate and not good enough. Saturn is also the stern disciplinarian, and physical abuse you experienced might have come from a sort of twisted belief that she was disciplining you. Then off you went to foster care, deepening Mom's inner torment that there is something wrong with her. So she feels resentful, back you come, and the cycle repeats.

Dead on again. So many of our disputes cycle through her expressing remorse for the past and abuse and then back to blaming me. "I wasn't a bad mother, you were a bad kid." She is tormented by the guilt, to me this is apparent - but at the same time she struggles with accepting responsibility.

I wonder, did she ever criticize you as being too emotionally clingy and needy? With your own moon and Venus in Capricorn and sun in Aquarius, you come from a place of considerable emotional detachment and restraint, yet all little children need their mothers!

Every paragraph I read from the synastry chart is completely accurate and I'm not searching for ways to relate. These are major themes in my life - so much so that if someone else I knew were to read this they would know you were talking about her and I.

One of my mothers favorite things to say to me when she has hurt me is "Get off the F'n Pity pot!!" Due to this being said to me so much I have learned that I have to restrain my emotions or she will attack me for them. Showing that she has hurt me arouses her guilt and is not tolerated. People have also always noted about me a very adept ability to compartmentalize all my emotions and issues in my life.

I think your ambivalence about your mother is shown by a quincunx from moon/Venus to Saturn. This aspect (150 degrees) gives an uneasy feeling that is hard to resolve. Saturn asks you to do your duty, even when it is a big emotional hardship.

My feelings exactly - now at least I know that it is Saturn who is insisting on this -

Just a couple of things about your own chart. You have Uranus square sun; comparable in some ways to your mother's Uranus opposite sun. This is a highly charged aspect, that frequently does lead to power struggles in inter-personal relations. Were you a very willful child? This aspect suggests that you are constantly chafing at restrictions. Fortunately, with Pluto trine sun, you are an opening for positive transformation in your life.

Maybe this is where some of the similarity is from. Something I can learn from. Oh yes I've heard "You're just like your mother" when discussing some specific aspects in life. Yes I was a VERY willful child. After the foster homes I ran away quite often and demanded independence at a very young age. I knew early on that her abuse was unacceptable and I struggled constantly to be free of it - openly and sometimes violently.

You also don't mention whether you have siblings. You have a formation called a "kite" that points to Neptune in your third house. The third is all about communications, but it includes one's neighbourhood, siblings, and short-distance travel. If you have siblings, how did they fit into the family mix? I would read this kite as your developing a spiritual way of thinking, whether or not you subscribe to any conventional religion.

I am an ordained minister with the Unitarian Church. I have studied Theology for the last 18 years. Spirituality plays a huge factor in my life. I am a practicing Pagan. This too has caused conflict between myself and my Christian mother lol - but that is sorting itself out these days - she is much more tolerant of my views so long as I don't step on any toes.

This really hits on your accuracy. I left this out. I do have one sister. She was born when I was 10 years old at the height of my mothers alcoholism and abuse. My mother would leave me to care her for days at a time. She forced me to be a mother to my sister when I was just a child myself because she was too drunk to do the job. To this day I still see my sister in sort of a motherly way. She is at this moment 24 and pregnant with her first child. This is another source of my anger at my mother - though this may be unwarranted. I am angry that she may let herself die and leave me once again to be the mother that my sister will need. I am long since tired of doing her job. But I love my baby sister just like she is one of my children and I will do whatever I have to for her.
This hits back on what you said about:

Then the Pluto transit just now hitting your mother's ascendant/Saturn, is also activating your own moon/Venus/IC. So just as mother is dealing with her body (BTW, Pluto is the modern ruler of sex organs), you are having to deal with all kinds of mother issues.

also.

So I doubt that Mom is going to change her ways, but one thing you can do is just let her talk. No need to reply or jolly her up. If her condition worsens, she may simply need to express her fears.

And please just realize that you are attracting good energy, as well, by being available for your mother, to help her; no matter how her inner demons express themselves.

I am truly going to take your advise to heart in these regards.

Now onto the composite chart. Have I written a book yet. I apologize. I keep thinking if I were you I would want to know what the other persons thoughts were on all aspects of the analysis - so I am feeling like I want to give you that in return for what you have given me. I wish there were even more I could do honestly.

I feel the reason you questioned the accuracy of your composite chart is because the relationship I have with her can be compared to the two sides of a coin. Completely different - yet one thing. In spite of all these things would you believe she is also often my best friend in the world as well as my greatest ally and source of support. In ANY conflict in my life, so long as it is not directly with her, she is 100% on my side. We are the greatest friends and the greatest enemies at the same exact time.

Maybe this good aspect is shown in the composite? Do you often feel one type of chart is more accurate than the other, or one type of chart deals with certain things better than the other? To me, the information you give me about the composite chart shows the best possible outcome. Or in other words "The brighter side of things".

but then I don't make up the blue (harmonious) and red (difficult) aspect lines on the Astrodienst horoscopes.

I have no idea what this means lol -

Possibly the New Age thesis is correct, that your and your mother's souls are operating at a level that does not so closely parallel a mundane level.

Judge Judy always says "If it doesn't make sense, it's not true. To me, this theory is the one that makes the absolute most sense to me. I've read that these charts are created on the other side long before we are born here on earth and we enter into agreements with other souls about what we will do and learn here on earth. Like many gears working together in an intricate piece of machinery. Many people question religions, or theories of God - because they can't understand if there is an "All powerful God" why "he" lets horrible things happen here. For me this theory explains that - that even the most terrible thing here is on the other side only considered a lesson to be learned and that all souls involved entered into an agreement and chose to learn those things. In this way I can make sense of the world.

I think the common sense approach is to suggest that you are doing the right thing. Whether Mom's cancer is terminal or she lives to be 100, the main thing is that you can look at your own life and feel you did the best you could for her,

I agree. For my own well being I need to tough this out and make sure at all times I am the person I want to be - and I don't want to do anything that may leave me with guilt later on.

You are precious for helping me with this. As I said, A true blessing. Just having you answer me and help me with this direction is

something nice for yourself

I feel such a sense of calm and reassurance now. I knew these charts HAD to explain these things, that it all HAD to be intended and you have shown me that is true. I could have been given no greater gift.

I would love to hear from you if that bit I told you about my sister hit a cord with anything in there. Other than that I certainly look forward to talking with you more on these forums. I hope you realize that many people don't take the time to help pure strangers like you have with me, and that says something wonderful about you. I'd give you a hug if I could .

Jaci

(I just realized how long this reply is - geeze - I'm sorry, You'll probably have to read it in more than one sitting lol)

[velocity3d]

If you're not familiar with the free charts calulator at Astrodienst (www.astro.com ) I highly recommend it.

I missed this part. Thank you very much for that link. Have you ever tried Astrolog? Is it comparable? I'm going to look into that!

[waybread]

Thank you so much! I retired from my "real job" a few years ago, and find myself devoting a lot of time to reading charts for people on line--as an amateur. This is especially the case this winter. I had some non-life threatening corrective surgery and am laid up inside the house at present for some weeks, so it is good to feel this is a constructive use of my time. But please give yourself a lot of the credit. I get tuned out by OPers who find me too moralistic, or simply inaccurate.

I don't have the skills or clairvoyance of some astrologers who can give readings with really uncanny insights. But one thing I noticed was your planets in the third house. Usually this does indicate siblings; and depending upon how they are aspected, either positive or troubled relationships with them. So it is consistent with your life experience that you mothered (moon) your younger sister (Venus) due to limitations (Saturn rules your IC) in your early home environment (IC.) Jupiter rules your 3rd house. Trine Neptune in the 3rd house, it contributes to your spiritual, altruistic nature, notably where 3rd house matters are concerned. [I am guessing that if a neighbour falls ill, you are there to help, also!] Your independent Jupiter in Aries is itself is ruled by Mars, located in your 9th house of the higher mind.

I looked at the transits around your 10th birthday, and noticed that transiting Neptune had crossed over your moon/Venus, and was conjuncting your IC. Neptune can put us into unproductive cycles of illusion followed by disillusionment, or alcohol and drug use; but a healthy Neptune makes us spiritual and even altruistic towards others less fortunate than ourselves. I can imagine the intense concern you had for this tiny child thrust into your care. With an alcoholic mother, Neptune's connection with alcohol also seems to be indicated. Transiting Pluto was also hitting your natal Uranus, suggesting a need to transform your rebelliousness in some way, beyond youthful acting-out.

I sometimes wonder if charts are easier to read, the more a person self-actualizes and is able to live an authentic life. If so, this may account for some of my successes here.

Thanks for hug--returned across the miles. W.