Suppressed by imagination

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Does it make sense to anyone else that I would prefer to hear the concepts of people alive and ready to say them than people who are dead and no longer offer reciprocation? - which aspects prove this?
I find that reading is far too tedious a task if it's in a large sum of material - I found Philosophy highly entertaining and thought-provoking at a particular phase of my life (long ago) - then never again.

The internet is a lovely medium for information (though never anything in particular for me, but everything in general) I never find myself buying books.

Also, for example; if something is directed to me and is made personal I often pay close attention 'and with great effort' than when something is not directed to me and therefore I pass it as insignificant or not interesting enough to have me research further into it.
Another example is that I'd prefer to be told what happens in a particular story (movie or book) by someone excited enough to tell it, than to read it myself. Not the type that likes to be told the synopsis if I'm already interested in the title; but definitely the type that feels the synopsis is all that's necessary to make the point without reading the story myself.

Is this style of person useful for anything particular outside of the 'already recommended' areas.?

[Frank]

Originally Posted by Sebastien Cheritte

Thanks Frank, noted.

Since you're here, care to elaborate? Or would it hurt your ego to be seen offering actual assistance instead of pointing 'to' the assistance.

The combination of your Pisces rising with its Domicile ruler Jupiter placed in its other Domicile Sagittarius and Cadent leads you to take the easy path, rather than actually work to accomplish anything. Fallen Venus in Virgo on your Descendant (Domicile ruler of your 3rd House), disposed by your 5th House Sun and 6th House Mercury in Leo, tends to make you demand answers from others (because you expect them to serve you) rather than do the research yourself. When your demands are not met, you tend to play the martyr due to your Fallen Mars disposed by Moon in Pisces, which again disposes to that Jupiter.
To break the cycle, you should learn to use the Mercury sextile Saturn and Pluto – submit yourself to deep and intense research into the areas that interest you, rather than using others as a crutch.

[starlink]

Sebastian, I have a son who is dislectic and therefore prefers to watch TV and have others inform him, then trying to read a book which is obviously not easy for him. The result of course is, that his grammar and spelling used to be quite appalling. He needed a spelling checker. Thank God he then realised this and now forces himself to read, instead of listening or watching.

Now I assume you dont have this disability, so not reading is no excuse really. I agree fully with what Frank says. It will lead to "writing atrophy" if you dont watch out. But OK, if you dont mind, than who am I to say otherwise?

Your chart shows a 3rd house (lower mind, reading, talking etc.) ruler venus in Fall and opposing your Ascendant. Your Moon, peregrine squares your modern Ascendant ruler Neptune. Venus forms a T-square with Uranus/Jupiter conjunction, Jupiter being the traditional ruler of your Ascendant and strong in own sign.

Now the Ascendant and MC ruler, you and your future, career, social status, are the same (Jupiter) and involved in this T-square with Venus, ruling the way you think,write and talk. This Venus will therefore have a negative influence upon yourself and your future, unless you overcome the difficulties involved. Jupiter is the focus of this T-square and being strong in own sign, could provide that strengh. It is the most eye catching configuration in this chart apart from the Grand Trine between Sun-Moon and that same Jupiter (in conj. with Uranus). It shows that you just dont care how you appear to others. That trine shows how easy it is to be like that. You are probably a person of extremes (Uranus conj. Jupiter) and do not accept any authority (shown by the T-square), so receiving any sort of advice will probably not be accepted by you.

Just a quick look, telling you what I see.

Starlink

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Well on that note - You are both Absolutely RIGHT & I UFKCING Love it!!!! BIG THANK YOU, NO SARCASM!

Well... OMG..first let me breathe, Frank, thank you - Do you realize how much it means to me to find someone who doesn't mind letting it out, noted, you've pointed at my weaknesses (which had I have been more observant, would have acted upon) and it has changed my mind about you, really, I have become a person that is open to criticism when it comes from a more intelligent and observant source hence even my search for such things as a Master (or the idea of one). I thought you were an empty arrogant schmuck - hahah, but I am wrong, you are not empty. thank you hahaha - It's just a joke, yes I have a sense of humor too, please don't be annoyed by it. I like you.

I would gladly do the research which yes, does seem a little intimidating, because I'll look like an idiot in the dark, but it's okay, rather that than remain ignorant.
I have to be honest though, I went to the site you mentioned where it offered CH.22 of the 'book I' you recommended and I didn't really have any idea what was going on in there... better link? ... please?

Starlink

thank you for your input.. between the two of you I have to admit that it's beautiful to watch my universe give me something when I ask for it... and my did I ask for it
I have also become a bit of a spiritual person, so I think to aid YOUR analysis I would say that it is not quite true that I don't care what people think (I VERY MUCH CARE, AND RESPECT - THAT IS WHY I ACT)
Also...to aid in your other analysis... I am very appreciative of advice if it ISN'T coming from someone in my family - somehow their view of me is a little obscured.

Would you mind taking another look, I will do the work if you present the task.. it's just that I don't know what I'm looking for.

[Frank]

Originally Posted by Sebastien Cheritte

I have to be honest though, I went to the site you mentioned where it offered CH.22 of the 'book I' you recommended and I didn't really have any idea what was going on in there... better link? ... please?

Download the Christian Astrology--Volume 1--MS Word 97 file from this link:

http://mithras93.tripod.com/books/books.html

The section on the planets begins with Saturn at page 57.


Frank - It's not just a name, it's a description.

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Well okay then, Frank.
Am I supposed to start one page 57?

[Frank]

Originally Posted by Sebastien Cheritte

Well okay then, Frank.
Am I supposed to start one page 57?

For the section on the planets, yes.

[starlink]

No, wait Sebastian, we probably misunderstand each other which often happens on paper.

it is not quite true that I don't care what people think (I VERY MUCH CARE, AND RESPECT - THAT IS WHY I ACT)

I did not mean that you dont care about other people. What I meant is that you probably dont care about what they think about you. I have the feeling that you could feel yourself to be a bit above others. Look, Mercury rules the 7th house of others and is placed in the sign which is ruled by your Sun (your self expression). So Merc. is as it were at the mercy of the Sun. Mercury is mostly peregrine in this sign as well, not at all at ease there. You somehow unnerve people. Sun in Leo can be very cocky at times, needs applause, attention, and in its own house even more so and that Sun can easily let himself go that way because it is in harmony with your emotional life, the Moon, in the 1st house, the Aries house, which can give this Moon, no matter how sweet she is in Pisces, quite a "me first" feeling which also goes very well with the expansive energies of Jupiter, chart ruler (traditionally) who is being whipped up by Uranus no less, exagerating things quite a bit. For you, being like that comes natural and you feel that you are OK the way you project yourself, but others (7th house) can find it difficult to relate to you, because by behaving like that, you separate yourself from others. It is interesting to see this. Your Venus is critical of others and this criticism does not help your relationships, nor your image (10th house) or career (also 10th), as Venus squares both that house and your 1st.
You are probably trying very hard to please (square) but it rubs the other way I have the impression.

I am very appreciative of advice if it ISN'T coming from someone in my family - somehow their view of me is a little obscured.

Now I dont know if you have heard of this, but often, feelings like that, can be projected on others lateron. So maybe you dont realize it but you have very definite ideas of how you want things to go or be.(your philosophy of life is an extreme and powerful one). Look at your 9th house strongly occupied and ruler Pluto in his own house 8, conjunct serious Saturn.

As you can see, Mercury (the others) also rules your 4th house of family, so critism from others wont be all that easy for you to take, nor advise (which is a form of criticism in disguise.

I dont know in how far you can follow all this of course. I still would advise you to learn a few basics and then read all this again. I am sure it will speak to you more clearly

PS, thank you for what you said at the beginning of your post.
Starlink

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Originally Posted by starlink

So Merc. is as it were at the mercy of the Sun. Mercury is mostly peregrine in this sign as well, not at all at ease there. You somehow unnerve people

Okay, I like this... I'm on a self-discovery role and you're on a help-me-discover role. Tell me, (sure, I am a beginner, but I do understand some things) What aspects could you see here that will allow me to change this ''unnerving'' that I do. Do you see in my make-up that it's possible for me to achieve it?

Originally Posted by starlink

For you, being like that comes natural and you feel that you are OK the way you project yourself, but others (7th house) can find it difficult to relate to you, because by behaving like that, you separate yourself from others.

Well, I hope you don't feel that way right now, cause I really feel like someone is really helping me, and that is worth everything I have right now.

Originally Posted by starlink

It is interesting to see this. Your Venus is critical of others and this criticism does not help your relationships, nor your image (10th house) or career (also 10th), as Venus squares both that house and your 1st.
You are probably trying very hard to please (square) but it rubs the other way I have the impression.

Yes, well, you are quite right there... I am a little bit of a wreck in the department of friends & family on almost every level.
My father seems to understand my lack of tools in the world, whereas my mother is quite balanced in almost every department, but the one that feels anything along with my sister. Nevermind. Moving along.

Originally Posted by starlink

Now I dont know if you have heard of this, but often, feelings like that, can be projected on others lateron. So maybe you dont realize it but you have very definite ideas of how you want things to go or be.(your philosophy of life is an extreme and powerful one). Look at your 9th house strongly occupied and ruler Pluto in his own house 8, conjunct serious Saturn.

Is that intuition? Should I follow this... it looks right, but maybe if I modify it to run congruently with others - listen more, give them the impression that I care how they feel, because I don't like the idea that it comes across that I don't care what they think of me... I care I care.

Originally Posted by starlink

As you can see, Mercury (the others) also rules your 4th house of family, so critism from others wont be all that easy for you to take, nor advise (which is a form of criticism in disguise.

Look, perhaps you are right to some extent and in some context, but if what you are doing right now is what you are referring to as 'advice' then it is worth every second of it's energy and will be absorbed by every fiber of my energy I swear it.

Isn't this what our experience in life must be, the sharing of energy? The giving to the star that gave us... well you sound governed by both water and air... and so I leave the keepers of knowledge to the keepers lest I taint it with my lack thereof, but only in this life, in my next I'll try to be more balanced.

It is what you are doing right now that matters to someone... to me, I have a name and a face, and it seeks anything. Anything bright and beautiful.
It's the fear of change that I wish to overcome and the will to move on that I wish to invoke.

Maybe you believe that you are doing nothing of importance, and that brings many tears to me.

[starlink]

Sebastian, thank you for your frank replies. I must say, you have a way with words, very good indeed and that is what I actually forgot to mention.

Do you see in my make-up that it's possible for me to achieve it?

You do have very good qualities,can be very original (Uranus/Jupiter in grand trine with Sun and Moon)and with an urge to be creative, with the ruler of your 5th house in the 1st. (creativity brought to you).

It's the fear of change that I wish to overcome and the will to move on that I wish to invoke.

It is that Mars, in fall in Cancer, which could be keeping you from bringing that all out. It is hampered by the square to your Saturn/Pluto conjunction. It could be the rigidness of opinion and the less accepting or listening to what others suggest or recommend. It is vital to give others the benefit of your doubt. I think that could be one of the things which could help you.

Your chart does not show where the Moon Nodes are. North Node often shows the path to follow, your quest in life. What are their positions in your chart?

Maybe you believe that you are doing nothing of importance

I realise that I am helping out, as that is my direction in life. I dont think importance plays a role here. I am happy if I can help you, in order for you to help yourself

[Sebastien Cheritte]

It says I have true node:
True Node Gemini 24°12'09 in house 4 retrograde
Another thing that could possibly help us out if it doesn't show on the chart is:
Imum Coeli Gemini 10°12'16Medium Coeli Sagittarius 10°12'16

[starlink]

Ok, thanks. So there is a 4th house- 10th house, private and public conflict of interest. In her book "the astrologers Node book", Donna van Toen describes the NN in Gemini as a need to share your awareness with others, but the South Node in Sagittarius (in your 10th house) does not want to stick around explaining things because that means you cannot learn anything that way.

The problem, according to her, lies in your obsession with learning, but having no interest in using your knowledge in any practical way. Difficulties in establishing lasting relationships leads to over-valuation of intellectual activities that provide indirect communication (like reading books, something you dont want to do so maybe , in your case,this is not the reason for those difficult relationships).

Anyways, one of the reasons could be poor judgement of people which has caused you to place your trust only in "proven" sources of information. There could be a lack of concentration which has led to communication problems and misunderstandings. Sometimes a speech impediment is the cause of relationship problems.

So, in order to improve your relationships, (this is me again speaking), you should maybe develop your latent communication skills. Share your knowledge with others.

A Gemini North Node can be a good talker (which I have noticed already), but you are often a poor communicator. You are good at tossing your ideas and opinions , trying to impress others, but I think you are more talking AT people than talking TO them. You make it impersonal, like talking to a class and not to to just one person.

There are a few signs of an over-developed South Node, I will choose a few, again from her book:

An expectation that others will hinder your freedom (your Venus-Uranus square)
Tendency to promise more than you can deliver.
Others could accuse you of being unreliable but you think that others are unreliable
Uncomfortable with peers in general.

I think it all is seen in the chart really.

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Sh*t.....

I guess I have to start being more sincere and truthfully sincere in conversation with everybody...

Does impatience arrive on my chart? The problem is often there... I am impatient... I know it is going to be my downfall, but it's hard to face... because I am excited to quickly get the solution and end the discussion so no more time is wasted. But this is proving to be bad management of resources (give & take of energy - I take more than I give (when it is beneficial to me) or give more than I take (when it is again beneficial to me, but this time in hopes it works for them too).

Alright... I have seen the error... My girlfriend loves you BTW - she thinks that you have stamped what she has been trying to tell me for 2 years (through other means).
Imagine how forgiving she is...

Especially when you mentioned that I speak impersonally as if to a class, often in this state she is crying and I am standing. It's quite disgusting when I see it from this perspective, it looks rather militant, and well, obviously that is no way to treat our loved ones.

It is quite true that I feel often like I have a divine or at least an exalted purpose socially, personally & spiritually, which will explain my VERY EXTREME methods and Social-Engineering skills. At which time I take it upon myself to try to sway other people's ill-informed perceptions or unfair/improper or extreme ideals by trying to replace them with mine... this often leads to arguments and even burned bridges.
All fault of my own, I see and understand this now.

I have a friend or two (but they are friends as long as they don't feel I am trying to push something on them) - I realized I have made this gap between myself and others primarily for a better understanding of myself which might have turned the wrong way (alienation, superiority & elitist demeanor). These two friends are quite good at ignoring the opinionated and stern structure I have built around myself (My girlfriend & a friend that lives in Sweden) - They must possess qualities within their make-up that aren't too perturbed by my aggressive approach and extreme style of speaking and acting.
I am more thankful they haven't left me to my vices everyday.
I feel somehow like they help me steer my ship, the best crew anyone could have in this harsh world.

I almost feel like I should tell you that it's quite difficult being who I am; somehow I feel like I was that child I mention in my quote in the nursery that picked this character I am and must now make it work as a human-being.

When I look at my mothers chart I feel unbalanced and unworthy, like I have learned nothing.
When I look at my girlfriends chart I feel like she IS my balance and without her I am left for the crows.

Somehow my universe is trying to show me through you and various other sources I deem important something I am unable to comprehend, but am trying so very hard to.

I will be honest with you Starlink, because you seem like you appreciate honesty and I have the feeling in your writing that you are someone motivated and even compelled by genuine virtues; that I can't see myself becoming 'deeply' involved with study as Frank had so perspicaciously noticed was a possibility, because I feel I am running out of time. I am 26, I must begin no matter how hard it will be the transformation of self & ego. I mean that we are all in a boat together that is falling to pieces. The egocentric manipulation of the human being for fuel to someone's greed must stop. And we are in an era of highly volatile systems that need the final blow for collapse - allowing man to think for themselves.

Do I have any qualities that will help me to overcome my fear of people?
Do I have any qualities that will help me to realize my oneness with people?
Is it meant to be that I remain afraid of everything?
Based on your marriage of Science, Astrology, Astronomy & whatever other occult you might take interest in and have mastered; would you say that the human being on that particular chart is a guide, servant of man, giver of hope, bringer of peace or hermit?
I am searching for my purpose.
I do not believe I am so wise that I will see it as you do in the stars.

This was heartfelt.
You are under no obligation to respond if it not your wish.

[starlink]

Thank you very much for your heartfelt answer That takes courage and I admire that. You do see you problems, you are hoping to solve them, you want to become a better person. That is all that matters. Most people dont even start looking at themselves. You did. I will try to answer your questions but at the moment a bit short of time. Try to be patient and I will get back on these issues. Thank you for your kind words. You seem to have a great girlfriend. It seems to matter to you NOT to loose her and that is good.

because I feel I am running out of time. I am 26, I must begin no matter how hard it will be the transformation of self & ego.

This sounds too melodramatic. You are YOUNG!!!! you have your whole life in front of you. I am OLD and I am still studying, still reading, still trying to change certain aspects of myself. It is never to late for anything. Dont you forget that one!

Will be back, Starlink

[starlink]

Does impatience arrive on my chart?

Well, with such weak Earth in your chart, and so much fire, yes, I would say so. Also that Asc. ruler in Sagittarius and conjunct Uranus cant wait very long.

I know it is going to be my downfall

Does not have to be! If you know where you weaknesses are, you can do something about it. Just take a deep breath and count till 10 before you act or re-act

My girlfriend loves you BTW

Well, that's very nice, thanks

somehow I feel like I was that child I mention in my quote in the nursery that picked this character I am and must now make it work as a human-being.

I guess that is your inner child Sebastien. You probably still have a bit of growing up to do, develop maturity, before you can make yourself into the man you want to be.

I mean that we are all in a boat together that is falling to pieces

Oh boy, that sounds WAY too pessimistic. Where do you get all that negativity from?

Do I have any qualities that will help me to overcome my fear of people?
Do I have any qualities that will help me to realize my oneness with people?
Is it meant to be that I remain afraid of everything?

Fear is a very complex thing. In astrology it is often shown by the placement of Saturn in the houses. Saturn holds us back which can be good as well as bad. When we are too careless, Saturn can put on the brakes, so we dont get into an accident.
But if Saturn is involved in everything we do, then Saturn becomes a problem.
As you can see, Saturn is positioned in your 8th house, the house where we have the need for research, discovering all and everything that lies under the surface, turning the bucket upside down to find out what lies at the bottom. It is the house of intensity, transformation, neuroses and our search for power, especially power over ourselves. So with that Saturn of yours, conjunct Pluto, making the fear even more powerful, placed in a house full of unknown things, subconscious demons, I can imagine what you are going through.

You have the ruler of your 9th house and 11th house in the 8th. So these areas (friends and philosophy, (mind) travel,) have to find an outlet in that 8th house and that is not easy.

With the ruler of the 9th in the 8th, you are attracted to anything which can fulfill you emotionally and which provides a meaning to you, probably the meaning of life itself. Traveling and meeting different cultures or philosofies, can have a big influence on you, because it can bring deep inner processes to the surface, and sometimes it can bring up your darker side, which in turn can force you to have a deeper and more serious look at yourself. This can be very unnerving as you can well imagine.

The 8th house is full of psychological stuff which you and everyone else, have burried deep down in order not to be confronted with it, but certain crisis in life (transits over that Pluto/Saturn conjunction) can bring it all to the surface and can make you very insecure and fearful. So your own life philosophy (9th house) is what keeps you up and running and you want to defend that feeling at all cost, but in that 8th house, a house similar to quicksand, you probably feel that you could easily loose control over that. And also over your hopes and wishes in life, because that is your 11th house. And friends. It is all brought into that house of insecurity and fears. And because Pluto and Saturn are ruled by Venus in your 7th house, it affects your relationships.
In order to establish better relationships, you should try to let go of your tendency to make others do what you want or dominate them (to camouflage your own insecurity). You dont want to adjust yourself to others, instead you want others to adjust to you and do the things according to what you like, because that gives you a safe feeling. And with your very strong and intens way of doing things, wanting to get to the bottom of everything, doubting everything etc. you could push people away from you. Not everybody likes that sort of thing, so automatically will become selective. Instead you should allow yourself to accept other people's views and wishes. This will open a whole new dimension to friendships and relationships. You really wont die in the process even though this 8th house is all about living and dying, for real or psychologically.
Changing this can make it possible for you to make real friends for life.

Another way of getting over your fear is getting counseling of course. Maybe together with a counselor, you could get to the deeper lying reason for all this fear, which often can be found in childhood of course. I think it would do you the world of good as you inherently want to get to the bottom of things. Hypnosis would be something you could benefit by and you could even learn to do self hypnosis with that Pluto/Saturn in your 8th house. In order to loose fear, you have to attack it head-on.
servant of man, giver of hope I would say.Certainly not a hermit! Dont let that 8th house get to you!
You said yourself you are becoming more spiritual. That is good.Mercury in 6, ruler of 7 trines your Asc. ruler Neptune (spirituality) in 10 and your South Node, the place where you give out to the world. Neptune rules your Moon who is the ruler of your 5th of selfexpression and that one in Grand Trine with your very strong Sun and Jupiter, ruler of MC can only bring success, but not until you have overcome that fear and insecurity.

[Sebastien Cheritte]

Starlink...

I don't know what to say.
I wish you could see how thankful I am.
This is really what I've needed.
Encouragement.

I wish you a brighter day everyday
beautiful dreams, good company, warmth, good friends and love in abundance.

Thank you so much

You are truly a star-link

Thank you

[starlink]

Those are lovely wishes Thank you!