I have venus square neptune in my natal chart which has caused me many problems and disappointments in love. I ALWAYS fall for people who are unattainable in some way (I'm gay - they're straight. Or I'm single, they're involved). My idealizations and fantasies about others have also caused me great pain and disappointment in my life. At first I thought it was just some sort of self-destructive thing I did to myself, but when I looked at my chart, there it was on the printed page!
I feel like I will never meet anyone who really loves ME. Honestly, I just feel like giving up on love altogether. Recently I've fallen hard for another unattainable person. When I did our composite chart, I noticed my venus is square her neptune. Looks like I've done it once again!! I feel like I can just never win in this game called love.
Is it my destiny to be unhappy in love? How can I overcome this??
The Venus / Neptune square has a very wide orb. That should make it easier to contend with than a very exact aspect would. It is not even drawn into the chart like the more exact aspects are. And it is separating, not applying in exactitude, which weakens it even further. So I do not see this aspect as insurmountable in any way. It may make you
less likely to see others clearly, and you may have to spend more time 'researching' potential partners, before getting your heart set on them. But it should not 'prevent you' from finding a suitable love interest. It just makes things a bit foggy in the mean time.
Uranus is the ruler of your 7th house of relationships. With Aquarius on the cusp, you may be hard to relate to on an intimate level because you tend to remain aloof for quite awhile after meeting someone. Aquarius on the 7th likes to 'test' others to verify their worth as a potential partner, which others may see as off putting or awkward. Aqarius on the 7th is a very hard nut to crack, purposefully so. Your ruler of relationships, Uranus, is in Scorpio in the 4th. You may be way more emotional and intense than you first let on.
That may take others by surprise. The Uranus opposes the MC and squares the Sun in the 12th, so you are probably very complicated emotionally. Sun in Leo in the 12th really wants to be loved and admired and praised and cherished, but the Uranus tends to 'reject' those who attempt to do so before they even get started. Perhaps the people who really do find you loveable, and want to be in a relationship with you, are 'dismissed' before given much of a chance.
The sextile to Pluto in Libra, and the trine to Neptune in the 5th, tell me that you WILL get a handle on this. You will eventually learn how best to form loving relationships from flirty friendships. But first you have to learn how to see through decoy or mirage bogus relationships set up by your venus/ neptune square. Do not fall for love at first sight or sudden flashes of soul mate syndrome. Your true love relationships will be more work to get started, but will grow and survive.
Your Moon in the 11th in Cancer trines your Uranus from the 4th. That means there is huge crossover between emotional life [ cancer/4th house] and the friendship/community life. [ Uranus, 11th house] So it feels right to fall in love with friends and associates, and to mix the two. That can be good in the long run, but just know that it is not comfortable for everyone to mix those 2 worlds.
Wow, thank you very much! This gives me much more insight in the problem. What you wrote about being hard to get to know, aloofness, and "testing" others fits me quite well, though I'm not proud to say it. Ditto the hidden intensity and emotions. There is also the problem of "dismissing" others who are too complementary or overtly interested in me. I'm always chasing after that dream of making it work with someone who has no real interest in me . . . I think if I can learn to sort this out, give others a chance more, and see things clearly, I will be okay.
Wow, thank you very much! This gives me much more insight in the problem. What you wrote about being hard to get to know, aloofness, and "testing" others fits me quite well, though I'm not proud to say it. Ditto the hidden intensity and emotions. There is also the problem of "dismissing" others who are too complementary or overtly interested in me. I'm always chasing after that dream of making it work with someone who has no real interest in me . . . I think if I can learn to sort this out, give others a chance more, and see things clearly, I will be okay.
Thanks again!
'Chasing after the dream' of making it work with someone unattainable serves a very important purpose. It serves your Uranian need for space. It is often more comfortable 'chasing' someone who is not going to get caught, than it is having to actually relate to someone who is attracted to you and interested in getting close to you.
The sun in the 12th is not usually comfortable with someone coming on too hard, or too overtly interested. The urge for privacy and the need to stay safe and protected is
overcome in those situations. So maybe aquarius types can be good for you.
Then you can slowly get close and open up in your own time frame. Anything is better than just chasing the elusive soul that you really do not even want to catch up to.
So you can see that the Venus/Neptune is maybe an illusion, a distraction, that keeps you blind to the real issues. And that is a very important first step to help you realize your true goal, which is to find the strength to open up and express your need for intimacy and closeness, without feeling weakened by it.
the chart you posted is rather poor quality, it doesn't even show the square from venus to neptune and I can hardly read the degrees off the list. Much better fro astro.com For help on how to do this, go here http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12126
If you sun trines Neptune that puts your Neptune 15' which means this square is very wide orb of 8' Although this is 'rose tinted glasses' aspect I don't think you can blame everything on Neptune.
Sun square Uranus is impatience, moon square pluto =emotional obssessing, controling, demanding. What does concern me is ruler of 5th house Jupiter is in 12th house which suggests secret liasions, plus having sun,Jupiter and Moon in 12th suggests you prob more like self sacrificing pisces and need time alone to recharge and enjoy a 'richer' inner life and prob quite psychic too.
Saturn conj Mercury is inhibiting your speech and knocking your confidence in 1st house (Equal house) but in Placidus conj 2nd house cusp. This can also cause occasional depression and withdrawal of communications with people, great for study but not the social life.
SO, there's lots going on in your chart and being a spiritual person, I believe that we have chosen these circumstances, family, people with whom we ultimately are going to have our 'chosen Lessons' with this time around anyway.
There have been two Aquarius' in my life and both were very kind and showed a genuine interest in me. The problem was, I wasn't physically attracted to either of them. I wish I were though; either of them would have made great partners. I'm always falling for aloof, unattainable Virgos :\
the chart you posted is rather poor quality, it doesn't even show the square from venus to neptune and I can hardly read the degrees off the list. Much better fro astro.com For help on how to do this, go here http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12126
If you sun trines Neptune that puts your Neptune 15' which means this square is very wide orb of 8' Although this is 'rose tinted glasses' aspect I don't think you can blame everything on Neptune.
Sun square Uranus is impatience, moon square pluto =emotional obssessing, controling, demanding. What does concern me is ruler of 5th house Jupiter is in 12th house which suggests secret liasions, plus having sun,Jupiter and Moon in 12th suggests you prob more like self sacrificing pisces and need time alone to recharge and enjoy a 'richer' inner life and prob quite psychic too.
Saturn conj Mercury is inhibiting your speech and knocking your confidence in 1st house (Equal house) but in Placidus conj 2nd house cusp. This can also cause occasional depression and withdrawal of communications with people, great for study but not the social life.
SO, there's lots going on in your chart and being a spiritual person, I believe that we have chosen these circumstances, family, people with whom we ultimately are going to have our 'chosen Lessons' with this time around anyway.
Venus Square Neptune ruining love life
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