How many [insert dog breed] does it take to change a lightbulb?

[Lissa]

Just a quick one before I start with the cleaning ,

Taken from http://www.flutrackers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=86814

How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

4. Rottweiler: Make me.

5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, checked to make sure I haven't missed any, and made just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb.

10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

11. Chihuahua : Yip! yip, yip, (Yo quiero Taco Bulb) yip, yip, yip!

12. Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there .

13. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

14. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle.

15. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

The Cat's Answer: "Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF.

[natasa812]

If you need someone to bring the newspaper to you without taking out the athletic new first…

By yourself a dog

If you want someone who will go crazy just for seeing you…......

By yourself a dog

If you want someone who will eat anything you put in front of him and never tell you that it is not good enough as his mothers is…

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who will want to go out any time, for as log as you wish to…

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who will never touch the remote control, doesn't care about football and IS able to seat next to you to watch romantic movies….

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who is happy to warm your feet in the bed and if he snores you can kick him out……

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who will not criticize what ever you do and he doesn't care if you are beautiful or not.

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who doesn't care if you are fat, tin, old or young…

By yourself a dog...

If you want someone who reacts to anything you say like it is worth hearing with fool attention and he loves you unconditionally…

By yourself a dog...

But, on the other hand, if you want someone who does not come when you call for him, is ignoring you when you come home, is outside all night and comes home only for food and sleep and reacts like you exist just for his happiness…

Then, my friend, by yourself a cat!!!

You thought I was talking about men…

[Lissa]

Ah!But men fit the description too!

[freedomlover]

:rotflmao: Dogs ( and cats!) have such different personalities! This was so funny because I can actually imagine the dogs saying these things!

[lillyjgc]

justa walkin the.....

Aries dog: *HEY! Who's walk IS this anyway?*
Taurus dog: *I'm only coming if I can wear my new collar. And we go where I say, ok?*
Gemini dog * Oh goody...can we go now? can we? can we?*
Cancer dog * Are you serious? Its raining! and I just got this couch all warmed up!*
Leo dog *I'll show everyone what a good dog I really am!In fact I'm the best dog you'll ever have!*
Virgo dog: *have you got my special water bottle? That leash could do with a clean. I hope you've checked for cars!*
Libran dog: *Let's go down this road! Actually, no...Lets go over here....ummm now I think about it, the pie shop is just up there...*
Scorpio dog *Remember that ugly old scungy dog that snarled at me the other day? Have you done something about that yet???*
Sagittarius dog *I'm coming! But we won't be needing that lead by the way* (wagging so vigorously a cup falls off the table)
Capricorn dog..*Yes, I'll come. I wouldn't want you to think you wasted all that money at Obedience school*
Aquarian dog: *Why couldnt I have been a guide dog too?*
Pisces dog *I'll go....but later. Right now I'm just in the middle of a lovely dream*..(nods off again)

Cheers. Lillyjgc
(hope no dogs take offence at this )

[lillyjgc]

Sorry-thought it hadnt posted so I tried again!

[Lissa]

Oh Lilly,that's so funny!My Arian fox terrier fits the Aries quote quite well-Fox Terriers are very stubborn and headstrong,add to it that mine is an Aries! Lol