at the ripe age of 25, but I am still very unsure of what should I do. I kind of have this vocational issue split in my mind - those things you do for yourself, because you love them, and those you can do to serve the community... and it is all one big mess in my case...
I have quite difficult situation going on. I graduated painting because it is what I've been doing for over 10 years actively now, something I do for myself. Paint. Ok, in that department, I have no doubts.
But comes the time when bills should be payed. Selling paintings is extremely random and not enough. I haven't had a job ever. Not one day of working. I cannot imagine anything I could do with this profession besides maybe an art teacher in an elementary school, which I searched, but with no luck. I have an extreme aversion to anything involving public work, or dealing with lots of people(cancer asc, sun opposition MC) and could never imagine myself doing so.
I feel like having a job is just not fit for me, and then I see all the people around me having a job, and feeling completely useless to the society.
I sometimes wish I studied something else, maybe psychology work would be suitable, but I feel it is kind of late to do this now.
Even in financial side of this wouldn't be a problem, I would still feel like an outcast in some way, because this thing I do can in no way get me a place in a society, as a working person. I cannot connect the two.
Now, astrologicaly speaking, and I must admit I am no good in making predictions, especially not for myself, and would be grateful if someone could take a look at my chart. Will this situation change, will I somehow be able to integrate this interest of mine into something more usefull than a painting on a wall, or is it valid to look into other options regarding work? to change paths?
I am very torn over this, and completely stuck (like a Charlotte character in 'Lost in Translation' movie, one of my favorites)
Any possibilities of me getting a job in the near future? I have Pluto entered and transiting the 6th house, I am thinking this might have brought this intensified thinking of work issues, and Neptune in 6th in natal, could mean it will always be an unclear situation?
Career with sun opposing MC is far far from my inner being, I always thought. But Moon sextile and Mars and Uranus trine MC could mean good things, except I haven't found those yet...
And I was never the one to ask this kind of things, nor was money ever of any interest to me, but will the money always come from the house(ruler of the 2nd in 4th)? money situation does become real enough eventually even if one is an artist...