Feeling destructive at work

[gemfem]

I attached my natal chart and I was wondering if anybody could see anything going on to enlighten me about a work situation.

so something I feel as unfair has been happening at work for a while now and it happened again the other day. I was trying to meet a deadline and it happened again...this time something inside me snapped and I have not been the same at work since.
I mentioned it right away and was brushed off...
now everyone can tell my energy has changed and has been asking me if something is wrong, but now quite frankly I do NOT want to talk about it with them. They are concerened and I just tell them no nothing is wrong.

I am usually VERY good at shaking something off and rolling with the punches but this one was very hurtful and I can't seem to let it go.
I know most people's advise would be to bring it out to the table to make it better, but to me right now it has become a VERY personal issue that I don't want to share with anyone.
I want to heal this one on my own

I do not want to lose my job and for the most part I like my job.but I feel destructive and rocky right now and NEED to be left alone at work. I feel like something inside me changed and I do not want to go back to the way it was and I need to take a stand. I know I can't effectivly take a stand though if I don't tell people but like I said to me it has become a personal issue that I need to change, work on and heal within myself

I understand that you have to put yourself aside and make sacrafices to keep your job but now that think about it every few months I feel destructive as though I am about to just say $%#% it just to be myself as this job does not feel like my destiny. This is scary becausee this is how I make money to feed my family right now

[gen6k]

hi
you just came out of a saturn square moon on july 24 from 10th to 2nd.
around august 10 youre going to start making stable plans saturn sextile saturn from 10th to 8th.
around august 10 youre going to get a venus return.
your weak spot for a while is home cause neptune with chiron are traveling in the 4th.
now as for money/new cycle
when jupiter reaches over your venus and jupiter in cancer and its also the solar 2nd house for gemini then you'll probably feel on the right track.

the worst from work should be over, but there still some chiron to midheaven in regards to your path. its going to take some time to sort it all through but you should be able to make progress.

it doesnt look like youre going to feel super-comfortable for a while basically untill you make changes, but there will be opporunities to make changes. uranus square venus.

it is also one of your artistic periods, but its going to switch to a more leadership style after 2013.

overall you should culminate towards a july 2013 transition a longer range with a higher output.

well definetly think about it during this jupiter trine pluto in the 10th house your concentration is going to be more penetrating towards the end of the month.

when it comes to dashas, youre in a better period than you were in 2010.
this will keep on asending somewhat untill 2016 where you could have certain conflicts with mars.
but in 2017 you should be in a better financial period overall. so even if you were let down by certain things in 2010, early 2011 well different kinds of opportunities are available.

also since your jupiter is in the 7th next to venus for your jupiter dasha in 2017 there would be more traveling with expenses.
"In 7th house causes travels, pilgrimages, marriage if not married"

[Peregrine_Moon]

Hi Sarah. I don't know if I can help much, but I'll try to say what I see in your chart.

Both your Sun and your Moon are peregrine, bringing your ego and your reigning needs to the forefront, dominating your horoscope. The Gemini Sun/Capricorn Moon is a productive mix: your Sun is versatile and mentally sharp which feeds into your Moon's need to make things happen. You can be analytical and determined. When things are going well, your ambition and productivity dovetail nicely.

Right now, transiting Saturn is square your natal Moon, creating a conflict between your personal needs and your responsibilities to others--consistent with your feeling that, at times you'd like to quit your job, but you have to support your family. If there are conflicts between your work and your home life at the moment, you may feel more isolated from your family, or in general. (Those with peregrine Moons often feel all alone, as though we just don't fit in anywhere. With a Capricorn Moon, the feeling that we need to do things by ourselves is strong, and can also alienate us from others who would like to help if we would let them. I know this because I have a peregrine Cappy Moon, too.)

You also have transiting Uranus opposite your natal Jupiter. Sudden, potentially dangerous opportunities may arise. You may be surprised by unexpected changes at work, too. Consequently, this is not a great time for taking financial risks.

Meanwhile, transiting Pluto is opposite Jupiter. You may be under outside pressure to change some of your beliefs or extreme religious or political beliefs may become factors in your life in some way. Being subject to, or even perpetrating, abuse of power or authority is also possible with this transit. Be careful about how you deal with these things if you're facing them.

I notice that transiting Neptune is inconjunct your Midheaven and North Node, which brings some uncertainty for you in terms of the direction of your career and life-path.

Looking at transits that connect with some of your natal midpoints, you have Saturn square the Mercury/N. Node midpoint which underscores your reluctance to share your views about what has happened at work. You should be careful, though, in case your reluctance is misplaced. Transiting Neptune is qd your Mars/Pluto midpoint, which inclines you to calculate strategies and may lead to plotting rebellion. That you may have difficulty with group decisions that impact on you is indicated by transiting Saturn's conjunction with your natal Uranus/N. Node midpoint. This contact will be in effect until May 31, 2013, so try to be aware of that.

By solar arc, Saturn is conjunct the Jupter/Neptune midpoint. Your sense of idealization may be breaking down, becoming more realistic. Be careful, though, to avoid self-deception.

Also by solar arc, Uranus is square your Mars/Pluto midpoint which may give you a surprising amount of energy and a dangerous sense of attack--your sense of feeling destructive at work is congruent with this. Take care not to act in haste: this contact can produce a "fight first, talk later" attitude that may not be in your best interests!