Parents in the natal chart

I've been studying astrology for a while and im getting better at it. i read an article this morning about our parents showing up in our natal chart.
first, which do you use the sun or saturn for the father? and as i look unto my chart, i see the sun and the moon making nice aspect to eachother, trining at 10 degrees. and the sun only make nice aspects, which doesnt correlate with my father...
and my parents relationship didnt last too long, i havent seen my dad for over 10 15 years, im 25 now. He was rarely in my life and he used to beat me and my mom.. altough i dont recall any of that. my mind probably blocked it, and i have a very poor memory for some things.
They met when they were 16 or 17 at high school, my mom is of european descent and my dad is south american, i can see the culture clash. anyhow, i just dont see this in my natal chart... where is it?? am i not seeing something?
are trines just not that good?

lilopinpin said:

I've been studying astrology for a while and im getting better at it. i read an article this morning about our parents showing up in our natal chart.
first, which do you use the sun or saturn for the father? and as i look unto my chart, i see the sun and the moon making nice aspect to eachother, trining at 10 degrees. and the sun only make nice aspects, which doesnt correlate with my father...
and my parents relationship didnt last too long, i havent seen my dad for over 10 15 years, im 25 now. He was rarely in my life and he used to beat me and my mom.. altough i dont recall any of that. my mind probably blocked it, and i have a very poor memory for some things.
They met when they were 16 or 17 at high school, my mom is of european descent and my dad is south american, i can see the culture clash. anyhow, i just dont see this in my natal chart... where is it?? am i not seeing something?
are trines just not that good?

Click to expand...

I use the moon/Saturn polarity for mother/father comparisons. this polarity is much more ancient that the sun/moon polarity.. also Saturn and moon are opposed by house ruler ship, though there is a ongoing debate as to whether Saturn rules the 10th house and the moon the 4th house versus the moon ruling the 12th house and Saturn ruling the 4th house.

look to see what aspect there are between you moon and Saturn and from what you say I think you will find they are square or there are Neptune or Uranus afflictions to Saturn.

rahu

ok thankyou, i also rather use traditional astrology. the moon and saturn are in inconjunct signs but dont make an aspect.
is it because their whole horrible relationship never affected me that much? it cant be... or i never viewed it as troublesome ?
Saturn's only hard aspect is uranus. a 10 degree conjunction of two slow moving planets..
the moon is in leo inconjunct mercury i totally see that in my mom not expressing her emotions properly. its also sextile mars and conjunct jupiter... im a very jupiter person and me and my mom dont really get along shes way too down to earth for me..
i just dont see how it relates to me and my childhood

Moon and Chiron (wounded healer) conjunct. Wounded healer in Cancer (sign of mom or family). Something between you and your mom is deep pain, it's the wound. Sun is opposite Mars. To me that could suggest a father who was passionate or tended towards anger?
Am I even close?

Spiritlite.

lilopinpin said:

ok thankyou, i also rather use traditional astrology. the moon and saturn are in inconjunct signs but dont make an aspect.
is it because their whole horrible relationship never affected me that much? it cant be... or i never viewed it as troublesome ?
Saturn's only hard aspect is uranus. a 10 degree conjunction of two slow moving planets..
the moon is in leo inconjunct mercury i totally see that in my mom not expressing her emotions properly. its also sextile mars and conjunct jupiter... im a very jupiter person and me and my mom dont really get along shes way too down to earth for me..
i just dont see how it relates to me and my childhood

Click to expand...

you might look to see if the Saturn/moon midpoint makes any hard aspects to the unconscious planets.

rahu

Interesting. I never considered Mars to be opposite my sun through its a 11 degree aspect. And yes chiron conjunct the moon definetely points to the obstacles of our relationship. We don't talk about emotions.. she started to give me hugs and recently and I start to call her sometimes just to tell her I love her. Also Lilith is conjunct the sun.. so my dad had trouble treating women right. So without these asteroids we couldn't have really seen thus...

Moon Saturn midpoint is 27 libra. Squaring the north node, and chiron. That makes a t square

lilopinpin said:

Interesting. I never considered Mars to be opposite my sun through its a 11 degree aspect. And yes chiron conjunct the moon definetely points to the obstacles of our relationship. We don't talk about emotions.. she started to give me hugs and recently and I start to call her sometimes just to tell her I love her. Also Lilith is conjunct the sun.. so my dad had trouble treating women right. So without these asteroids we couldn't have really seen thus...

Moon Saturn midpoint is 27 libra. Squaring the north node, and chiron. That makes a t square

Click to expand...

Saturn /moon mp square the node and chiron reflects your parents troubles as chiron and Saturn can be very abusive. In your situation this shows your father always criticizing abd belittling your mother .he can being tears to your mothers eyes by his words. He can be cold and emotionless.
rahu
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What about nice Sun aspects and Moon-Sun aspects? They are important. Can't we see in them certain support?

I do not find the Saturn-Moon nor Sun Moon necessarily depicting one's parents in the natal chart. The planets are not persons.

Some say the Moon is representing home, feelings and most relationships you will have. If you want to use rulers, in your chart you can see that that Mercury is ruler of home (ruler of IC and 4th house) and it is the midpoint of a yod formed by Moon and Mars. Moon and Mars making a yod with home ruler can represent those troubles you mention, and the close vicinity of Uranus to Mercury may also represent instability and the fact that your father left.

But the thing is that this Moon-Mars-Mercury yod is not ONLY representing this, it also represents the way you yourself deal with emotions and relationships and it will represent your own home as well when you will have one. Those three planets in combination mean that you easily get upset, might have lots of fights and that you can be aggressive in speech.

I'll tell you that the ruler of my 4th house is also Mercury (I use sidereal zodiac, but if I use tropical, then the Moon would be ruler and the same applies). My Mercury is conjunct Mars and both square the Moon. I remember times from my childhood when my parents were always fighting, up to the point they wanted to divorce, but they settled their differences and stayed together until my mother died. My father could be aggressive to the point where he used violence on me for discipline. I can be a bit aggressive as well, although I do not use violence, but want to argue my points in my relationship.

rahu, thankyou very much for your input. as i subconcsiously blocked a lot of memories, i always wondered how they were when together, my mom is unable to communicate emotionally so she never shared anything at all with me. and as for my dad, i willl be meeting him this weekend, along with my 2 step sisters who are 9 and 12. i feel i need to do this to get over somethings... i felt i always blamed my mom for not getting to see my dad, because she never explained anything to me as a child.

God bless you

Arena, everything you said sounded like me. and i like your approach to looking at the IC instead of viewing people as planets. it just seemed to work for so many people and never saw it in my chart, sometimes this topic would even make me doubt astrology, in the sense i would think well if astrology is real shouldnt my parents be represented in that.
when i discovered lilith conjunct my sun i just linked it to my dad beating mymom, and making her feel vulnerable

God bless you