thinking as a child
jjgirl,
You said:
I'd like it if you would expand on your idea that as children we experience our energies from the outside in until at some point we can own them ourselves. I can understand this to a great extent BUT where then does the responsibilty and blame lie for the abuse inflicted on a child, an animal or any living creature? I worry about my son...as he inherited my Saturn Sun conjunction so now thinking he may have similar experiences with his father...emotional distance between them, with rejection on both sides...How do we protect our children from experiencing those projected energies in a harmful way?
When we come into this world we need to be protected from the dangers around us, because we can not protect ourself. We are forced to accept that our future is in the hands of those around us, and give our energy to them. As we get older, we begin to rebel against these "hands" as we try to get back the energy we so freely handed over. This rebellion continues as become ready to go out on our own as adults. As a result, there is ALWAYS some type of conflict between child and adult, as children fight the adults to get back their own energies so they can use their energies in their life.
Now consider that these energies in the child are the things which define the child and help make the child who it is, and that these energies in the child interact in certain ways and focus on certain things. From this we see that these energies are a point of view for the child. Everything in the inner/outer world is filtered through these energies, causing the child to see the world in a certain way. This means that, no matter what happens inside/outside us, the child will see things in the way that flows best with our energies. If the child has many challenges in our energies, they think the inner/outer world is or should be challenging. If the child has many easy flows in our energies, the child thinks the inner/outer world is or should be easy.
This does not mean that our inner/outer world IS any of these things...it only means the child SEES their inner/outer world this way, because of their point of view. The child SEES the world a certain way, and come to believe it is that way, because that's what their energies "tell" us. Sometimes this works out very negatively, since the child has VERY challenging energies, which attract to us people who are mean or cruel to the child. For other children, the challenges are not life threatening, but affect how they interact with their parents and others. For example, using your Sun's chart, with Saturn (duty, also restriction, authority) conjunct Sun (self-expression) conjunct Midheaven (outer world), he tends to see the authorities (including parents) in the outer world as restrictive...no matter WHAT the parent does!
This can be VERY frustrating for parents, as they discover than to matter what THEY do, the CHILD will see them in a certain way, depending on how the child's energy interacts and where it is focused. In order to help the child as much as possible, the parent can come to understand the point of view of their child and work to help the child accept their own energies, while the parents prepare their child for going out into the world on their own. And this means, after a certain later time in a child's life (usually around the late teen years), the parents protect them less and allow the child to have their own experiences in life. The parents can then talk with the child about their experiences, and help them to understand those experiences in the child's own way.
This process of the child becoming a separate adult is always very difficult, both for the parent and the child, since the parent began their experience with the child in sharing the child's energy and the child came to expect that that energy sharing would continue forever. But, in order for the child to become an adult, a break must be made, so that the child owns their energies for themselves, both the easy energies, and the challenging ones. This process takes a LONG time and only comes to anything like a "completion" during the Saturn return, at ages 28-30, when we are forced by circumstances to "put away childish things" and to become an adult, separate from our parents.
Adulterated,
Tim