Artificial Lifeform
Member
I would like to first point out that astrology isn´t a hobby or something (the interest is very mild to say the least) - I just happend to be raised by two people who are really into astrology.
But I´m an open-minded person (one of the few traits I really like about myself) who values everyone´s oppinions, and thats why I´m here more or less.
You guys and gals know astrology a 100x better than myself, so I turn to you experts for consultation. Maybe you astrology geeks (hey, nothing wrong about being a geek!) could perhaps explain why I am like I am and how I can even start dealing with my issue of finding a partner.
Like I wrote earlier, I am the son of two astro geeks so I´ve picked up a little here and there. But through my uprising I´ve geneerally just seen astrology as ******** - being an aquarius and all: can you blame me? (we question EVERYTHING).
With this in mind, try and keep the technical vocabulary at a very minimum or I´ll have problems following you. I don´t know what Uranus in Sagittarius means. or what the houses are for instance.
So what actually made me come here? Well I did one of those natal charts online and when reading that the answers really saddened me as I came to the conclusion that I´m really poor boyfriend material, as I have some of the worst (darkest) aquarian traits you can have.
I don´t really care "how" this astro stuff works, because I´m fine saying "I don´t know" when things are beyond my comprehension. I´ll just say that most of the stuff (80% or more) of the things I read are so true - and that bothers me.
So, Im born with the sun in Aquarius, on the 29th of january 1985 at 6:10 am in the morning (in Stockholm, Sweden) - so from that I´m sure you can get a lot of basic astro facts about me.
My number one problem in life is relationships: I have no friends (lots of acquantences though) and I´m simply unable to form deep relationships with people. And despite being 29 years old and good-looking, I´ve never had a girlfriend. In fact, no one has ever been interested in me.
which ofc is very saddening. I´ve been depressed for like 10 years before I finally managed to get a career in a field that lies close to my heart (a creative and technical one), and today I feel much better. But still, the issue with relationships is still there.
It wasn´t until very recently that I looked up my natal chart. I knew things were bad but not -this- bad. For example: Every time my mother has been talking about the sign of aquarius with others (to my brother or sister for example) I´ve always commented on it by saying:
"Yeah, aquarius is the worst sign in the zodiac".
As I see it, I´m totally incompatible with everyone - and I´m not talking about the zodiac signs here I´m talking about women. Sure, there are a lot of things I appreciate about myself/being an aquarian: I´m creative, intelligent, objective and have an ability to think outside the box (sometimes too far
outside the box!) - and I always think the best of other people (sometimes in a naive way). But, on the other side I can be very negative! It´s something I´ve worked a lot on in the past few years, which has led to an increased self-confidence - I feel better than I have in 15 years. But I´m never fully
satisfied with my accomplishments - ever! When I was feeling the worst, I went to a psychologist who said that I was being way too hard on myself - which appears to be true now in retrospect (-28 square sun, Pluto - whatever that means).
Anyway, getting to the point: I have too many flaws and weaknesses as I see it. Here´s a list of some of the greater ones.
-I have a tendency to be negative
-Im odd and weird
-I have an introvert personality
-I´m emotionally cold and distant - at least externally (which is what counts!)
-I´m not in touch with my feelings, or anyone else´s for that matter...
-I´m terribly afraid of opening up to other people, so I rarely do it. I get uncomfortable exposing myself as weak.
-I have a strong need to control my own life
-I´m really stubborn!!
-I´m not comfortable with too much change, too quickly
-I have a strong need for privacy and alone time: My energy levels get drained a lot faster from socializing than it does to normal introvert people. This further gives ppl the impression that I´m cool and distant and want nothing to do with ppl (even though I long for company)
-Being an aqua, I´m actually really asocial - much "thanks to" the above two points. I´m not comfortable in large crowds and I don´t like situations where I have to socialize with a lot of ppl who I don´t know.
-I´m very bound to my routines
-I have incredible issues reading people (emotionally, but also their body language)
-Emotionally, I am bad at adapting to new stuff.
-Im a way, WAY, too deep thinker. Most ppl simply can´t keep up with my out-of-the-box thinking (typical mercury in Aries -kinda thing?)
-I constantly avoid activities I find is a waste of my time, even if it´s activities I know are good for me in the long run (typical Jupiter in Aries thing?)
-Tremendous issues being empathic (my EQ is -HALF OF- my IQ!!!)
-I constantly annoy people with my rebellious way of being and my way of always questioning things (especially ideas and behaviors I find stupid. Like a scorpio I will point out flaws in a second!)
-I have a temperament when I´m emotionally driven "across the line". But thankfully it also takes a lot before I get there.
-Im sarcastic
-Im strongly oppinionated. I have oppinions about everything, many which are not very politically correct (which angers women!). For example:
-I do not want to have kids - ever. In fact, I dont like having to socialize with children. I dont hate them ofc, kids can be lovely! But I just dont want to have anything to do with them. This is a huge problem when closing in on age 30, as most women (without children) is starting to panic, having mom-feelings.
-I don´t like club life and noisy environments. I don´t like big crowds and parties where you meet a lot of ppl (the ideal party for me is with 4-5 ppl I know, in a safe environment such as back at someone´s home)
-I don´t believe in giving money to beggars
-I want to legalize drugs, prostitution and I have plenty of other libertarian/minarchistic ideals - and I loath politicians
For many years I just couldn´t understand why people dislike me so much, and why women NEVER have shown any interest in me - but now I know...
When I speak to others, read on online forums and so on, I quickly come to the conclusion that I simply do not have enough positive character traits that women appreciate. In their eyes I´m a defect personality - definetly not boyfriend material.
And the worst of all is that I´m so **** comfortable living like this: I´m comfortable and lazy - at least externally. On the inside on the other hand, I really long for a traditional relationsghip - and I really just want to find someone I can dedicate my emotions to.
I´ve had a lack of self-confidence for a very long time - but no longer. I´m no longer depressed and I have a better looking appearance than I´ve ever had in fact, both women AND men have complimented my good looks.
So yeah, being alone no longer depress the **** out of me! I´ve seen the contrasts and I know how much I´ve grown in the right direction the last couple of years.
But here I am, not knowing what to do and how to progress with my life; thinking that I´m never gonna find anyone that will be interested in me for longer than it takes to have a proper conversation.
Stuff from that naval chart I did online:
Sun in Aquarius
Moon in Taurus
Mercury in Capricorn
Venus in Pisces
Mars in Pisces
Jupiter in Capricorn
Saturn in Scorpio
Uranus in Sagittarius
Neptune in Aries
Pluto in Scorpio
Lilith in Aries
North node in Taurus
EDIT: Someone told me my 7th house is entirely empty - and that it is the house of close relationships. But what exactly does the lack of a planet in said house mean?
But I´m an open-minded person (one of the few traits I really like about myself) who values everyone´s oppinions, and thats why I´m here more or less.
You guys and gals know astrology a 100x better than myself, so I turn to you experts for consultation. Maybe you astrology geeks (hey, nothing wrong about being a geek!) could perhaps explain why I am like I am and how I can even start dealing with my issue of finding a partner.
Like I wrote earlier, I am the son of two astro geeks so I´ve picked up a little here and there. But through my uprising I´ve geneerally just seen astrology as ******** - being an aquarius and all: can you blame me? (we question EVERYTHING).
With this in mind, try and keep the technical vocabulary at a very minimum or I´ll have problems following you. I don´t know what Uranus in Sagittarius means. or what the houses are for instance.
So what actually made me come here? Well I did one of those natal charts online and when reading that the answers really saddened me as I came to the conclusion that I´m really poor boyfriend material, as I have some of the worst (darkest) aquarian traits you can have.
I don´t really care "how" this astro stuff works, because I´m fine saying "I don´t know" when things are beyond my comprehension. I´ll just say that most of the stuff (80% or more) of the things I read are so true - and that bothers me.
So, Im born with the sun in Aquarius, on the 29th of january 1985 at 6:10 am in the morning (in Stockholm, Sweden) - so from that I´m sure you can get a lot of basic astro facts about me.
My number one problem in life is relationships: I have no friends (lots of acquantences though) and I´m simply unable to form deep relationships with people. And despite being 29 years old and good-looking, I´ve never had a girlfriend. In fact, no one has ever been interested in me.
which ofc is very saddening. I´ve been depressed for like 10 years before I finally managed to get a career in a field that lies close to my heart (a creative and technical one), and today I feel much better. But still, the issue with relationships is still there.
It wasn´t until very recently that I looked up my natal chart. I knew things were bad but not -this- bad. For example: Every time my mother has been talking about the sign of aquarius with others (to my brother or sister for example) I´ve always commented on it by saying:
"Yeah, aquarius is the worst sign in the zodiac".
As I see it, I´m totally incompatible with everyone - and I´m not talking about the zodiac signs here I´m talking about women. Sure, there are a lot of things I appreciate about myself/being an aquarian: I´m creative, intelligent, objective and have an ability to think outside the box (sometimes too far
outside the box!) - and I always think the best of other people (sometimes in a naive way). But, on the other side I can be very negative! It´s something I´ve worked a lot on in the past few years, which has led to an increased self-confidence - I feel better than I have in 15 years. But I´m never fully
satisfied with my accomplishments - ever! When I was feeling the worst, I went to a psychologist who said that I was being way too hard on myself - which appears to be true now in retrospect (-28 square sun, Pluto - whatever that means).
Anyway, getting to the point: I have too many flaws and weaknesses as I see it. Here´s a list of some of the greater ones.
-I have a tendency to be negative
-Im odd and weird
-I have an introvert personality
-I´m emotionally cold and distant - at least externally (which is what counts!)
-I´m not in touch with my feelings, or anyone else´s for that matter...
-I´m terribly afraid of opening up to other people, so I rarely do it. I get uncomfortable exposing myself as weak.
-I have a strong need to control my own life
-I´m really stubborn!!
-I´m not comfortable with too much change, too quickly
-I have a strong need for privacy and alone time: My energy levels get drained a lot faster from socializing than it does to normal introvert people. This further gives ppl the impression that I´m cool and distant and want nothing to do with ppl (even though I long for company)
-Being an aqua, I´m actually really asocial - much "thanks to" the above two points. I´m not comfortable in large crowds and I don´t like situations where I have to socialize with a lot of ppl who I don´t know.
-I´m very bound to my routines
-I have incredible issues reading people (emotionally, but also their body language)
-Emotionally, I am bad at adapting to new stuff.
-Im a way, WAY, too deep thinker. Most ppl simply can´t keep up with my out-of-the-box thinking (typical mercury in Aries -kinda thing?)
-I constantly avoid activities I find is a waste of my time, even if it´s activities I know are good for me in the long run (typical Jupiter in Aries thing?)
-Tremendous issues being empathic (my EQ is -HALF OF- my IQ!!!)
-I constantly annoy people with my rebellious way of being and my way of always questioning things (especially ideas and behaviors I find stupid. Like a scorpio I will point out flaws in a second!)
-I have a temperament when I´m emotionally driven "across the line". But thankfully it also takes a lot before I get there.
-Im sarcastic
-Im strongly oppinionated. I have oppinions about everything, many which are not very politically correct (which angers women!). For example:
-I do not want to have kids - ever. In fact, I dont like having to socialize with children. I dont hate them ofc, kids can be lovely! But I just dont want to have anything to do with them. This is a huge problem when closing in on age 30, as most women (without children) is starting to panic, having mom-feelings.
-I don´t like club life and noisy environments. I don´t like big crowds and parties where you meet a lot of ppl (the ideal party for me is with 4-5 ppl I know, in a safe environment such as back at someone´s home)
-I don´t believe in giving money to beggars
-I want to legalize drugs, prostitution and I have plenty of other libertarian/minarchistic ideals - and I loath politicians
For many years I just couldn´t understand why people dislike me so much, and why women NEVER have shown any interest in me - but now I know...
When I speak to others, read on online forums and so on, I quickly come to the conclusion that I simply do not have enough positive character traits that women appreciate. In their eyes I´m a defect personality - definetly not boyfriend material.
And the worst of all is that I´m so **** comfortable living like this: I´m comfortable and lazy - at least externally. On the inside on the other hand, I really long for a traditional relationsghip - and I really just want to find someone I can dedicate my emotions to.
I´ve had a lack of self-confidence for a very long time - but no longer. I´m no longer depressed and I have a better looking appearance than I´ve ever had in fact, both women AND men have complimented my good looks.
So yeah, being alone no longer depress the **** out of me! I´ve seen the contrasts and I know how much I´ve grown in the right direction the last couple of years.
But here I am, not knowing what to do and how to progress with my life; thinking that I´m never gonna find anyone that will be interested in me for longer than it takes to have a proper conversation.
Stuff from that naval chart I did online:
Sun in Aquarius
Moon in Taurus
Mercury in Capricorn
Venus in Pisces
Mars in Pisces
Jupiter in Capricorn
Saturn in Scorpio
Uranus in Sagittarius
Neptune in Aries
Pluto in Scorpio
Lilith in Aries
North node in Taurus
EDIT: Someone told me my 7th house is entirely empty - and that it is the house of close relationships. But what exactly does the lack of a planet in said house mean?
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