Intense attraction between straight and gay man...can you help?

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strangeronearth

Active member
Hello, I've been hanging out with my straight friend for the past four months and the sexual tension between us is palpable (he even jokes about it). However, I'm too afraid to make a move because he claims to be completely heterosexual (even though he has made out with men in the past). For whatever reason, I can't shake the feelings I've developed for him - can someone offer astrological insight as to why I feel that our relationship is somehow fated or karmic?

Btw, I don't have his birth time. Attached is two synastry charts and both of our natal charts.
 

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MaeMae

Banned
Hello, I've been hanging out with my straight friend for the past four months and the sexual tension between us is palpable (he even jokes about it). However, I'm too afraid to make a move because he claims to be completely heterosexual (even though he has made out with men in the past). For whatever reason, I can't shake the feelings I've developed for him - can someone offer astrological insight as to why I feel that our relationship is somehow fated or karmic?

Btw, I don't have his birth time. Attached is two synastry charts and both of our natal charts.

best not to waste your time with someone who doesn't know who they are. too many blank spaces for your imagination to fill in.
read up on "other man", "other woman" scenarios.
the oft-time loser is the one who is most truthful with themselves but refuses to accept it.

unless this is strictly about conquest....
 

SniperBomber328

Well-known member
If it helps in any way (since this is an Astrological Board, not a(n) counselor's board) look too Mars in synastry (some say Venus). I say Mars, because Mars shows the type of men one is attracted to. Venus shows the type of women. Also look to the Sun for men in general, as the Moon indicates women in general.
 
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cstarz

Member
Hi
for some reason I cannot view your charts
But i am not afraid to comment. First I agree with the 2nd Reply
This is NOT a board for giving advise of the egoish kind.Its for learning about where the planets are and how we may or may not respond to them.
seeing your both men I am thinking that there must be a way around the planet thing.A man is man after all.You cannot Judge a man by Venus.
How about age? Which of you is older? even if its by minutes...give one of you Mars and one of you the Sun. More important lets think about the 5th house of Romance Ruled by Leo and the 1st house which is Ruled by Aries and Aries is ruled by mars;mars is our drive it what spurs us into action its what makes us strong and its what puts the power in our Libidos
So look to where these houses areand what signs are upon them on the cusps or intercepted inside them How does his sun or mars relate to your 1st and 5th Houses?How do YOUR sun and Mars relate to his 1st and 5th houses Then there are the aspects is there a Sextile Trine Square or opposition from his Sun or Mars to any of your personal planets?Visa Versa for him.
Ask yourself this however? Which one of you is THE pursuer? One of the other replys were right- is there an issue of conquest involved?
never forget we all have BOUNDARIES and we should all be respectful of them. Possibly lay off for a time wait to see if he comes back to YOU...if he doesn't just get over him there are plenty of fish in the lake cast your line out again...if he naturally calls you or visits you and displays the actions you desire...and says he wants you in that way,then cancel that fishing trip.
Do some basic research on Synystry composits and mid points even.
Wish i could help you more. Take Care.:smile:
 

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
Hello, I've been hanging out with my straight friend for the past four months and the sexual tension between us is palpable (he even jokes about it). However, I'm too afraid to make a move because he claims to be completely heterosexual (even though he has made out with men in the past). For whatever reason, I can't shake the feelings I've developed for him - can someone offer astrological insight as to why I feel that our relationship is somehow fated or karmic?

Btw, I don't have his birth time. Attached is two synastry charts and both of our natal charts.
Traditional astrology offers the following astrological information to you strangeronearth

Bonatti said, Quote:
"And Aomar said that when Mercury were Almuten over Venus and the Moon or over the house of women and the Part of the same or over many of these the delight of the native is in young boys and he delights in seducing them."

Almuten = The method of identifying the almuten involves considering the full range of essential dignities, so that rulership by sign, exaltation, triplicity, term and face is considered - not just rulership by sign. Hence Venus is said to rule the sign of Libra but Saturn is the almuten, being capable of assuming rulership by exaltation, triplicity, term and face.

I have attached an essential dignities table that illustrates rulership by sign, exaltation, triplicity, term and face :smile:
 

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sandstone

Banned
stranger,

just a quick glance at the composite says it probably won't work.. lots of tension and frustration with the mars-saturn opposition in the 5/11 houses.

meanwhile venus is closely conjunct saturn too, so the fated, karmic flavour is partly captured there too, mind you your north node/moon opposite his pluto is also another astro signature pointing to fated or karmic type connections if you go with the theory of the nodal axis as having a karmic connection.. past lives are supposed to be connected to our moon position in western astrology, so it makes sense the moons nodal axis would carry some of this association as well. good luck working it out.
 

waybread

Well-known member
I took a quick look at your synastry, and basically the two of you have a lot of inter-aspects. These can generate strong feelings of friendship or romantic interest. Then both of you have Venus square Mars, so you are both sexy people to begin with. The issue really is does your friend want a sexual relationship with you or not. If not, you either have to accept the situation as-is, or walk away.

Your suns are closely sextiled-- it suggests not only ego compatibility, but some excitement being around one another.

Your moons make no major aspect, suggesting a not-so-good emotional fit, although your ("Stranger's") Venus trines Chris's moon, indicating genuine affection on your part.

Although these aspects are out-of-sign, his Venus makes a wide square to your Mars, and your Venus makes a close square to his Venus. While this can be hot stuff, it does generate friction or tension.

Your Jupiter conjuncts his moon, which shows he does feel good around you but maybe just not interested in going to bed with you.

This pattern is reinforced with your composite chart-- a lot of intensity in this relationship. However, you friend may have barriers that you have to respect-- and apparently have done so.
 

MaeMae

Banned
waybread, you're awful!
tell him all these hot things about the attraction and then say, "but neh..."
; )
who will listen to that?

sniper ~ sometimes astrology loses to common sense, not "counseling."
if i met a man who had all the makings of a championship swimmer but discovered he's afraid of water, i wouldn't want to push him in the pool just because i thought he knew how to swim.

we do no favors, astrologically or otherwise, to encourage bad ideas.

how would stranger feel about a woman who was convinced that he, as a gay male, needs to be switched over?
.
if it ain't a two way street, no point in driving it unless you know you're heading in the right direction. besides, no one here as looked at neptune/uranus.
 
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dr. farr

Well-known member
For me, looking at the composite in whole sign, I find the difficult and chaotic South Node in the 1st whole sign house, and I find the often changeable and revolutionary Uranus within 2 degrees conjunct the South Node-which I consider to be a very difficult indication, involving as it does the "composited personality/essence" house (1st house); Jupiter/Neptune/ascending degree partile conjunction is also a very mixed indicator, showing a strong Neptune influence (can be romanctic delusions, illusions) affecting the "logical mind" (ie, Jupiter); mixing this with the South Node+ Uranus conjunction, all in that first house, seems to indicate a great deal of possible trouble and difficulty, in the potential relationship.

Star connections to elements of the first house are also unfortunate:
1) Han, a highly disruptive star, is conjunct in longitude Uranus (Note: some might give Antares here, as the more significant star; also quite disruptive especially connected with Uranus)
2) Kuma, which star channels in the often difficult influences of the constellation Draco, is conjunct in longitude the South Node
3) the very unfortunate Sinistra, is conjunct in longitude the ascending degree/Neptune/Jupiter partile conjunction-this is the most disruptive of the star connections here.

For me, these star connections with the elements of the first house ALONE would lead me to conclude a very likely difficult (or worse) relationship potential.
 
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waybread

Well-known member
waybread, you're awful!
tell him all these hot things about the attraction and then say, "but neh..."
; )
who will listen to that?.....

if it ain't a two way street, no point in driving it unless you know you're heading in the right direction. besides, no one here as looked at neptune/uranus.

MaeMae, I am sorry that you do not like my post, but presumably you are also committed to honesty in chart interpretation as well as the pragmatic kitchen-table advice we dispense around here. I looked at the whole charts, but in synastry the sun, moon, Mars, and Venus are usually the core relationship planets.
 

MaeMae

Banned
it was meant humorously, WB ~
really.
how many times do astrologers do relationship charts that scream "NO!" but the client latches on to the one or two good things mentioned and disregards everything else? i was tossing a crack into that reality.
nothing fowl intended.
as for astrology ~ my first glance at chart was seeing a uranus neptune conj. in one of the synastry
charts.
excitement found in illusion.
 

SniperBomber328

Well-known member
waybread, you're awful!
tell him all these hot things about the attraction and then say, "but neh..."
; )
who will listen to that?

sniper ~ sometimes astrology loses to common sense, not "counseling."
if i met a man who had all the makings of a championship swimmer but discovered he's afraid of water, i wouldn't want to push him in the pool just because i thought he knew how to swim.

we do no favors, astrologically or otherwise, to encourage bad ideas.

how would stranger feel about a woman who was convinced that he, as a gay male, needs to be switched over?
.
if it ain't a two way street, no point in driving it unless you know you're heading in the right direction. besides, no one here as looked at neptune/uranus.


I know, I just used it as an introduction to use for the topic I was going to talk about. I guess I could have worded my post better. I'll try to be more empathic and generous with advice in the future.
 

strangeronearth

Active member
Thank you for the replies! You'll be interested to learn that we got into a huge argument Tuesday night around 1:30 AM....I'm officially done.
 

MaeMae

Banned
is there a "classic indicator" of homosexuality in a chart? i wonder if we can then determine gender from a chart as well?
 

sandstone

Banned
a couple of nights ago t sun would at about 12 taurus which is right where the mars/saturn opposition sits in the composite chart - the midpoint by degree actually..add to this t mercury opp comp sun and the experience of a "huge argument" certainly fits.. i think composite charts are informative.. i wouldn't rely on them as a stand alone chart, but i think they do have a lot of merit.
 

sandstone

Banned
maemae

those are the types of questions i love to ask.. i don't think there is.. we can't tell the sex of a person off a chart - it could belong to an animal, or anything for all that matter.. and, i think we can't know the sexual orientation of a person off a chart either.. once one has the knowledge of a persons gender or sexual orientation, one might be able to speculate more on the chart though, but i don't think you can see either sexual orientation or gender in a chart..
 

byjove

Account Closed
I agree, every time I read your comment on this one I'm of exactly the same mind!

This is like the mutual reception idea - if you're familiar - one planet in reception of the other is not mutual...therefore there is no connection. I was afraid to read other's replies on your behalf - astrology cannot give the impetus for making a jump at what could be a big mistake. Re:recpetion, one gay is not enough, you need two. That's not what's happening here. Now, people jump out of their comfort zones and try new things yes, but you are particularly vulnerable here - you like him, therefore your judgement is skewed badly...also, if you can reverse things or cool them off to a good friendship I'd be surprised, if the heat is that strong and only one guy is gay I'd place the bet that something's going to happen far and away from your expectations :(

I wish you all the best in resolving this one though...:happy: I'm a dreamer, i get it.

waybread, you're awful!
tell him all these hot things about the attraction and then say, "but neh..."
; )
who will listen to that?

sniper ~ sometimes astrology loses to common sense, not "counseling."
if i met a man who had all the makings of a championship swimmer but discovered he's afraid of water, i wouldn't want to push him in the pool just because i thought he knew how to swim.

we do no favors, astrologically or otherwise, to encourage bad ideas.

how would stranger feel about a woman who was convinced that he, as a gay male, needs to be switched over?
.
if it ain't a two way street, no point in driving it unless you know you're heading in the right direction. besides, no one here as looked at neptune/uranus.
 

strangeronearth

Active member
a couple of nights ago t sun would at about 12 taurus which is right where the mars/saturn opposition sits in the composite chart - the midpoint by degree actually..add to this t mercury opp comp sun and the experience of a "huge argument" certainly fits.. i think composite charts are informative.. i wouldn't rely on them as a stand alone chart, but i think they do have a lot of merit.

Thank you so much for this detailed analysis! The fight was over money - we've been going back and forth about who pays for drinks, gas, food, etc.. He was irritated because I wasn't willing to buy him a drink after he had just complained about the fact that I never pay him gas money (he never requests it). We decided to keep things separate months ago, but the issue always seems to rear its head. We're both afraid of being taken advantage of. The fact that his Pluto opposes my 2nd N. Node further indicates that this friendship was meant to teach me something about financial independence, and to be wary of joint financial situations.

He actually called me out in front of a group of people, told me I could walk home - which I then proceeded to do, in the pouring rain. He called and texted to apologize but I think the aspects at work that night indicate that it is high time to let the dream go.
 

sandstone

Banned
thanks stranger,

the key connection in the synastry between you 2 for me is -your venus/pluto conjunction which squares your ascendant - to his mars on your descendant exact partile your venus/pluto by square.. love and hate - venus and mars, 2 planets in square and all the rest of it.. it is not a smooth interchange in spite of other areas of your charts that waybread pointed out that are favourable.. everyone is looking for something different on so many levels.. masochistic and sadistic relationships aren't very many peoples cup of tea!

hi PD187540

you have me curious.. what would some of the astro signatures be that represent sexual orientation? venus or mars with an outer planet connection? so many people have these.. i can't see it, but if in another 200 years when astrology is able to gain a greater degree of recognition - if we are lucky) it might come out that mars at the uranus or neptune/venus midpoint in the 16th harmonic shows up an unusually large number of instances, or some such thing like that.. more studies need to be done with astrology to legitimize so many of the speculative theories that are prolific in astrology..
 
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