Am I born to be loner?

haidee

Well-known member
Hello. :)

I'm a Cancer Sun, Aquarius Moon as well. I have a Virgo Ascendant though, not Capricorn, but it's a little similar still because of the Earth element.

It's common for Aquarius Moons to go by themselves, although our Cancer Suns really want someone/some close to us (friends). It's not because we can't get any friends, but it is partly our own fault... By example, you write "....and I don't contact anyone".

"I find it hard to open up"
Same, same... It's because Cancerians have a protective shell, only letting themselves open up to those they trust, and Aquarians are emotionally detached. You can work with this though. Practice communicating and change the way you think; any worries will most likely make you withdraw.
 

biobcoolio

Active member
I've got the Aquarius moon too, and I am also a bit of a loner. I've had a lot of friends come and go, been traveling a lot and met many people, but have always had problems opening up. I used to use drugs to solve this, but recently I've begun to be more honest with my self and thus increasing my self esteem. I would say go out and travel the world and start researching how to love yourself and increasing your self esteem. It has worked for me and although I still don't have so many friends, I have begun opening up more to the ones I have and I sincerely believe that this has changed my life, or rather IS changing my life. Take a look at this video, it seems cheesy but it REALLY helped me and now I am listening to different self love hypnosis audio recordings every night. Good luck to you and all the best! :)

YouTube video links: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rITJiaUwy1w

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MF1A4e90BwI
 

ashriia

Well-known member
Strangely I cannot connect with my peers at all. Also, I am very shy and introvert. I am having a hard time especially dealing with lots of people. I really want to have friends but I find it hard to open up.

Glancing over your chart, the shyness is likely do to several factors- Your chart ruler being Saturn. In general when saturn is connected to the ascendant there is definitely a shyness that is pronounced in the personality. perhaps even a distinct seriousness that inters with relationships with others as well. Add to that Saturn is found in Pisces, Cancer Sun.

Having Pluto in your 11th house in a very tight t-square involving Moon and Mars is a very intense configuration. The hard time you have dealing with lots of people is this involving volatility in the relationships in any way?
Pluto is currently transiting your 1st house.. Which is likely to be ushering in a new you. 360 permanent change. Which is likely associated with the identity crisis you referred to as you have a Neptune/Uranus conjunction in the 1st as well. Saturn ruler of the chart is also involved as it's placed in Pisces(Neptune).

I wonder if you might have some luck in networking with others via the internet - like youtube or some such tech presence? there are a few aspects and placements in your chart, IMO.. that seem like that would be a good avenue. Is that something you have had any interest in? As anyone with Pluto in the 11th is desiring of intense and deep friendships, but the t-square might create dramas in that area of life as well. And anywhere that Pluto is found there is a death/rebirth theme. So friendships and associations will be life changing in some way, also highly karmic indicated by your North Node conjunction with Pluto.
 

ashriia

Well-known member
Hello again,

Relationships of any kind take work with both parties. Perhaps making more of an effort to maintain relationships/friendships would be the best route.
Even if that means apologizing, or explaining what you do mean when you feel misunderstood. You can't expect another person to just know what you mean and "get you" if you don't communicate with them. If you want anything lasting.. it's gonna take more effort on your part. Not saying you should be the only one making and effort because that would be an unhealthy dynamic. But If you do care about someone, compromise and communication is paramount. I don't mean, romantic partnerships exclusively but friendships take work as well.

In terms of Pluto transiting the 1st house.. Its not "good or bad".. it just is, like all of astrology... these transits occur for you to grow and develop according to the life path you have chosen for this life, before you incarnated into this world. I am sure you can find info on the internet concerning Pluto transit 1st house if you look it up. It might prove helpful. Pluto transiting houses are major life events, so it would be great to learn as much as you can you in essence "go with the flow".

If you are a female, I don't see why you would not be able to get married if you decided to down the road. Jupiter is well aspected as is Sun. So it shouldn't be a problem. But if there are any self esteem issues (Saturn quincunx Venus) they should be addressed and worked on before entering a long term partnership. If you are male.. serious partnership is possible but might come later in life, and the spouse/girlfriend will likely be very plutonian in nature. (i.e. intense, dramatic, perhaps even a scorpio) The only thing that would be of concern would be again that T-square. Particularly the exact Pluto opposition to Mars. From your 5th house to your 11th house. This is great if you are involved in creative arts, or sports and use the energy that way. In romantic relationships sometimes it indicates violence/volatility/aggression. So if you own this configuration...it might lend itself to tremendous drive, I've even seen people who are metal musicians with this opposition from the 5th house that are very respected. Again, as I said... this t-square is intense, there is alot of fuel to it, if you use it. And don't allow others to bring it out in your life for you, which is likely to create problems along the way.

Hope that helps.:smile:
 

haidee

Well-known member
@haidee I'm really going crazy. I thought I'm a weird person. Others find it easy but I find it so hard to befriend somebody. I haven't had a single friend in my life. Maybe you won't believe it but until I was 16, I barely talked with my classmates or anyone. Some even thought I am mute! LOL Though I talked more during college days, I got a little close with a Saggy friend, she's kind but she's just too emotional for me. She cries over things I already warned her, so I think I got turned off by that. I cared for her but she doesn't seem to appreciate it. I envy those around me going out and playing with friends.
I always thought it's my family's fault that I'm this way. I have few interactions with them. They were emotionally cold and we rarely talked to each other. I also don't have good relationship with my brothers because I'm the only girl I got ostracized and they bullied me a lot behind our parents' back. I've been living alone since 10 years old with a caregiver.
After reading your reply, maybe it really has something to do with both just being born with it and environmental factors.
How can I open up with someone when I can't even open up with my own family? I got really hurt and I think I am now emotionally damaged. The worst part is that they are unaware that I'm suffering because of them.

Yeah, I think our Sun/Moon combination really wants someone who listens to us and keep our advices in mind. The good thing is that we can easily tell whether or not a person is being honest/truthful with us, so when your intuition tells you it's time to open up - it most likely is. :)

I guess you figured your own issue. A lot of self-esteem or identity (etc) problems stem from how you were treated in during your childhood/upbringing. I guess, if people hadn't approached me with optimism and enthusiasm during my childhood, I would've been very lonely myself, especially 'cause I had problems with my parents - who never seems to understand me. :lol:
I know it sounds cheesy, right, but hearing things like "positivity is a choice" and thinking about my past, analyzing why I acted the way I did while quotes on social media be like "It will get better," really helped me. But I guess in your case, if you say you're emotionally damaged and has been with a caregiver for 10 years, then maybe this won't help as much. I'm not a psychologist, but maybe settling things with your family will help you.
 

ashriia

Well-known member
The anger issues( with regard to throwing things) are more than likely from Pluto in opposition to Mars. Though Pluto to Moon has a temper as well. The opposition in your chart is very strong due to Pluto being conjunct North Node and Mars being conjunct South Node. So in astrological terms your opposition is on the Nodal axis(North Node/South Node) Meaning there is Karma carried over from other lifetimes with this aspect, particularly with regard to Mars -South Node - where you have been.

In terms of sign you most resemble - Sun is conjunct Mercury - youthful looking. Perhaps come across as a Gemini Sun. Your rising is Capricorn. Ruler of the chart in Pisces. So a combination of Gemini/Capricorn/Pisces would be my guess.:smile:
 

ashriia

Well-known member
Is there any more placements that I should be careful or I need to take note of? And which signs would be compatible and not compatible with my chart for romantic relationship? :)

The entire chart should be studied because it all works together. Usually I mention tense aspects because they create the most havoc when the motivations of them are not understood. But they offer drive/ambition. So understanding them really does benefit the native of the chart.

Add Juno to your chart on Astro.com The house it falls it and sign it falls it will offer insight into the long term partner or partners.
 

anon

New member
@ashriia Alright, once again thank you. I'm actually new to this and I got to learn more about myself thanks to you! :) I'm actually not aware of my T-square and other things you pointed out. I'll try my best to make myself a better person. :)
 
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