Neptune Rising
Well-known member
Hi
I've been a passive participant in life for much of my life I'm starting to realise. Situations though lately have presented themselves that have forced me to view myself differently (mostly I feel these power takeovers with my relationships). Situations lately that force me to take control otherwise I feel I'd be overcome ! Namely the situation involves a man that I desire very much, but feel would be absolutely no good for me to get involved with, but this man has alot of power over me (he is my boss). I feel this presents me with a chance to own my own power while being nice, feminine, honest and assertive, but this is something that I am so afraid of, afraid of the outcome that perhaps something terrible will happen to me if I refuse him, or that he would do something terrible to me....
I wonder if there is something in my chart that shows me this, why I have supressed my own power for so long and thus been presented with people in my life that 'take me over'.. In looking at my chart, I see no Pluto squares which would suggest to me power struggles to work through. I see Pluto trines though. Pluto trine to the Descendant ruler Mercury - could this show power issues to do with the men I have relationships with? This has always been the case. Pluto also trine to Venus, 5th and 10th rulers. This I think shows the power issues I have with relationships.
Pluto is also inconjunct my Moon, which could show my uneasyness with handling my power.
I also wondered if this has something to do with past karma. Pluto is trine the South Node and sextile the North Node, makes me thing this has something to do with past karma. A friend suggested that something terrible happened to me when I took charge of a situation in the past, maybe a past life, so now I keep it all inside. Moon is square the Nodes, suggesting the challenge I have with power. Squares are something that can be resolved however internally, and these make us stronger, like shaping us and moulding us in a way we will learn from.
The person that is stirring all this up has his Pluto/Uranus in trine with his Mars, and my Sun trines these, makes these into a grand trine. He is stirring up my hidden recesses with his Plutonian/Uranian and Martian energies. The trine is nice though, I hope for these energies to remain harmonious.
I also notice that Lilith is featuring strongly in my life now. I have progressed Sun in Pisces conjunct progressed Lilith, and in natal chart transiting Lilith is now approaching my natal Capricorn Sun, 4 degrees away now. I feel perhaps its also her energies merging with me. Perhaps she is showing me how to be a 'wild woman', owning my own feminine power and standing up for myself and what I truely want in life. In the past when confronted with situations, I may have used mild deception (Neptune rising and Pisces Moon square each other) to get out of being honest, taking control of the situation. I also could never use my full feminine power by being nice while being assertive. Now I feel Lilith is showing me how to do this.
My chart is in my signature
I've been a passive participant in life for much of my life I'm starting to realise. Situations though lately have presented themselves that have forced me to view myself differently (mostly I feel these power takeovers with my relationships). Situations lately that force me to take control otherwise I feel I'd be overcome ! Namely the situation involves a man that I desire very much, but feel would be absolutely no good for me to get involved with, but this man has alot of power over me (he is my boss). I feel this presents me with a chance to own my own power while being nice, feminine, honest and assertive, but this is something that I am so afraid of, afraid of the outcome that perhaps something terrible will happen to me if I refuse him, or that he would do something terrible to me....
I wonder if there is something in my chart that shows me this, why I have supressed my own power for so long and thus been presented with people in my life that 'take me over'.. In looking at my chart, I see no Pluto squares which would suggest to me power struggles to work through. I see Pluto trines though. Pluto trine to the Descendant ruler Mercury - could this show power issues to do with the men I have relationships with? This has always been the case. Pluto also trine to Venus, 5th and 10th rulers. This I think shows the power issues I have with relationships.
Pluto is also inconjunct my Moon, which could show my uneasyness with handling my power.
I also wondered if this has something to do with past karma. Pluto is trine the South Node and sextile the North Node, makes me thing this has something to do with past karma. A friend suggested that something terrible happened to me when I took charge of a situation in the past, maybe a past life, so now I keep it all inside. Moon is square the Nodes, suggesting the challenge I have with power. Squares are something that can be resolved however internally, and these make us stronger, like shaping us and moulding us in a way we will learn from.
The person that is stirring all this up has his Pluto/Uranus in trine with his Mars, and my Sun trines these, makes these into a grand trine. He is stirring up my hidden recesses with his Plutonian/Uranian and Martian energies. The trine is nice though, I hope for these energies to remain harmonious.
I also notice that Lilith is featuring strongly in my life now. I have progressed Sun in Pisces conjunct progressed Lilith, and in natal chart transiting Lilith is now approaching my natal Capricorn Sun, 4 degrees away now. I feel perhaps its also her energies merging with me. Perhaps she is showing me how to be a 'wild woman', owning my own feminine power and standing up for myself and what I truely want in life. In the past when confronted with situations, I may have used mild deception (Neptune rising and Pisces Moon square each other) to get out of being honest, taking control of the situation. I also could never use my full feminine power by being nice while being assertive. Now I feel Lilith is showing me how to do this.
My chart is in my signature
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