Maybe its just the age difference, but I'm sure you thought of that yourself already and it's not a big deal...so...
There are some interesting synasty aspects on this link.
http://www.astrology-x-files.com/synastry/venus.html
I eyeball that you have a sun square sun aspect.
Sun opposite or square Sun: These two people usually have objectives that are at odds with eachother. The result is that there may be clashes of ego, frustration, conflicts and lack of compromise. While the relationship may not be very harmonious, if they do learn to overcome their stubbornness with eachother, they can achieve a great deal because this combination has a higher degree of energy than the trine or sextile.
I am surprised things are as mellow as you say..you have mars conj his mars....your mars is square his venus as well...
Ahhh...that may be it...
I dated a girl that had venus square my mars and my mars square her Venus....I was slightly more aggressive and the timing was off....
We has a mars conj, Jupiter conj, Saturn conj, pluto conj....my venus trined her mars..and her venus squared my mars...and we had mars conj...this was all in synastry...
Your mars is square, but it is somewhat wide...didnt look real close...9, 10, maybe 11 degrees..the minutes of his venus are late...so you could say his venus is 24 degrees.....anyway...
an example of your mars square his venus from here.
http://www.astrology-x-files.com/synastry/ (over on the right is the links to aspects)
Venus opposite or square Mars: There is a strong sexual and romantic attraction here as well, but often there is some sort of problem with timing. The Venus person tends to think of the Mars person as too crude and aggressive. The Mars person usually thinks the Venus person is too stuffy or uptight. Compromise is necessary in order for this to work out well.
I also noticed you may have a sun square...
and a saturn square...9 degree orb for the saturn square in the synastry...keep in mind I am eyeballing this stuff....
His sun is trine you venus...almost 9 degrees...
His mars is sextile your venus...thats good...
Venus conjunct Mars: This combination is indicative of a strong romantic and sexual attraction. The Mars person is usually the one to initiate first contact. It is doubtful that your sex life will ever get dull with this combination. In platonic friendships, it brings about a fun and exciting atmosphere.
Venus trine or sextile Mars: This is essentially the same as the conjunction so you should read the description above.
I also thought it was intersting that you both had jupiter in the early degrees of a water sign, while both having it in the 10thH...carrer...yours cancer his scorpio.....so in synastry jupiter trine jupiter...
Jupiter conjunct Jupiter: These two people were either born in the same year or they were born a multiple of 12 years apart. It increases the probability that they come from similar religious, educational or philosophical backgrounds. If they weren't born near the same year, then the older individual may act as a surrogate parent or guide to the younger individual.
Jupiter trine or sextile Jupiter: This aspect is similar to the conjunction. It increases the probability that they come from similar religious, educational or philosophical backgrounds. Usually the older person will guide the younger.
you may have venus quincunx venus in synastry as well...somewhere around 150 degrees...a synastry chart would tell you...I ran across this the other day...
It is supposed to be a "hard" aspect..but I don't know enough about it...you have a Capricorn Venus...him a leo venus....at the most I would guess you see him as too impulsive or forward....you don't seem to be worried about that...more the other way arround....so I don't know...
From here:
http://www.astrologyforthesoul.com/vemamereln.html
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Quincunxes are probably the most confusing aspect in synastry. They tend to get a bad rap, which is partially quite well deserved. However, an actual close quincunx between compatible planets such as Venus-Venus, Moon-Moon, Sun-Sun, or ASC-ASC is actually a very positive connection on the one hand, in addition to the problems of the quincunx on the other hand. Quincunx planets have a "6-8" relationship with each other in astrology, which basically indicates an energy that is more heavy, "karmic," and dysfunctional. The really unusual thing about a quincunx is that a close quincunx (of three degrees and fifteen minutes or less) between basically 'soft' planets actually give some very strong compatibility to counter-balance the problems of the quincunx signs. I have to thank the Magi Society's research for helping me to eventually put this puzzle together. Venus quincunx Venus within three degrees? Thank them lucky stars. [/FONT]
You may find out more from the first link, there are quite a few aspects there and your going to know if they fit better then anyone.
Are you sure you have the right birth time for the Virgo asc.
change it just a little and the whole asc. changes a great deal.