Introversion and depression

[Charlot]

This is a bit long, sorry.
I am a gemini, but I'm not a very talkative or extraverted one like geminis are said to be and I'm trying to figure out why. Most geminis I've met have always been excellent communicators and able to hold up conversations for hours, but I'm not able to do this. I will go out of my way to avoid conversations if I *really* don't feel like talking. I don't and have never had a lot of friends, and don't feel I can relate to people easily so I never stay friends with people for long. I've always put this down to the fact that my moon is in aquarius. I know how untalkative some people born in aquarius can be because I live with one: my dad. My mother is a cancer and she constantly complains that he's too emotionally distant and doesn't talk enough, and my dad doesn't realise this is even a problem, so it frustrates him and I understand it's because he's simply happy being alone and isn't really comfortable dissecting emotions. Anyway, not only am I introverted but I'm also depressed and bored a lot. I can't even give a reason as to why I feel like this though and I have no idea why I thought astrology would help me with these issues, I guess I've just always had a slight interest in it. And until I can get any sort of psychiatric help with my problems I'll just do whatever I can to help myself feel better.

This is my chart:
http://s307.photobucket.com/albums/n...eta/2012-8.jpg

Thanks if you read this.

[R4VEN]

Charlot, I have redrawn your chart on astro.com because I don't especially like the version you've used, as it might look striking, but it's difficult to read in any detail. I have also reduced the orbs, and have drawn it in Equal house - you were born in Leeds, which is far enough north for a Placidus house chart to be very skewed - i.e. some houses are very small, while others are too large.

The word `introversion' which you have used is a bit of a giveaway. If you look at the 12th house on your chart you have Sun, Mercury, Venus and Jupiter all in this house. This is a sure sign of an internal and introverted nature - one who thinks a lot and actually prefers their own company to the company of others. This will be normal for you!! Are you a reader? Do you absorb knowledge and crave knowing more? I notice that not only are all your 12th house planets in Gemini, but your Ascendant is also, and yes, this is normally the person who loves to talk, but perhaps you are a knowledge-seeker in other ways. Perhaps you prefer to figure things out for yourself, rather than through contact with others.

The depression can also be put down to the deep internal nature of the 12th house planets, but also you have Saturn conjunct Neptune, both opposition Mars. One of my astrology texts - on spiritual astrology - states that those with Saturn-Neptune conjunct experience insecurity and depression perhaps as a carry-over from a previous lifetime where they experienced cruelty from others, leading them to wanting to withdraw socially in this lifetime. There is also a lot of strength in this conjunction if you can work on grounding your feelings and staying in the `real world'. The opposition of Saturn-Neptune to your Mars needs to be worked with consciously. It can deliver a degree of high expectation of yourself, but it can also lead you to being a bit delusional - about yourself as well as others.

No doubt you have a rich inner life. This is best accessed through some kind of creative activity - keeping a journal (in which you sketch as well as write), writing stories, drawing, music, anything at all which takes you out of your intellect.

[Vista]

I agree with what R4VEN has stated and just wanted to add a couple things.
Mercury, your Sun and ASC ruler while elevated and strengthened being in its own sign Gemini, it's retrograde meaning more of your expression will be inward. What makes it more solitary is of course the 12th house placement. This is a very hidden or behind the scenes house. I like the idea of creativity for you, in particular writing. I also read recently about retrograde planets and you have 4, again, this is someone who is very solitary and quiet. Have you given much thought to what you want to do? I suspect as you get older and more comfortable with who you are, conversation, perhaps one on one will become more interesting to you.