BBQ Man - again. Will smthing build from here?

KatyaVelikaya · #1 09-08-2010, 07:03 PM

Hi again everyone - I had posted a query/horary in early August
(here: http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum...ad.php?t=27016)

regarding a Virgo I met at a barbeque. His bday was yesterday and I posted on his Facebook wall congratulations. He posted an overall "thank you to everyone" along with an invitation to come to a party (same place as before - his house) this Saturday night. I intend to go.

Will something develop or build from here? By that I mean more frequent contact/friendship and or (sigh)...you know what I'm going to ask -- romance.

Here's the chart. I have to say i was stunned to see all the planets on one side. Is this a dragon's tail?? My take is no romance will come of this party. Something going on in his 4th house of home (well the party will be there). Saturn in his 5th house of women, hmmm.. Means difficulty for him to be in a relationship (?)
And both Mars & Venus in his 6th house of health/illness. What does THAT mean?
Jupiter/Uranus in his 11th (friends). Not sure what that means.
ZERO in my 7th or his 7th house...no romance. Any other takes?

misskitty · #2 09-09-2010, 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KatyaVelikaya

And both Mars & Venus in his 6th house of health/illness. What does THAT mean?

Rather than interpretting the significators as his 6th house, it is more significant to say they are in the 12th house. That is the worst house you can be in. In my opinion this chart is more or less echoing the other one you did last month, which is not surprising since that one should still be valid. The Moon is peregrine and combust, so it doesn't have power to act. His significator just changed signs, so there is a new situation in his life somewhere...

There is mutual reception between Mars and Venus. Mars is in the sign of Venus and Venus is in the sign of Mars, showing mutual attraction.

Also a dragon's tail is the South Node, not a grouping of planets.

You are conjunct Spica, a very fortunate planet.

EDIT: With the new Moon in Virgo the other day, and with all the activities affecting all Virgos lately thanks to the past Saturn/Uranus oppositions and now Merc Rx-- it is very possible that he is just in the middle of reorganizing his life. Attempt to get to know him anyway... just because the timing isn't right at the moment doesn't mean it won't be right later on...

KatyaVelikaya · #3 09-09-2010, 02:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by misskitty

Rather than interpretting the significators as his 6th house, it is more significant to say they are in the 12th house. That is the worst house you can be in. In my opinion this chart is more or less echoing the other one you did last month, which is not surprising since that one should still be valid. The Moon is peregrine and combust, so it doesn't have power to act. His significator just changed signs, so there is a new situation in his life somewhere...

Also a dragon's tail is the South Node, not a grouping of planets.

I just don't think this guy is the one.

You are conjunct Spica, a very fortunate planet.

Hey Miss Kitty, thanks for chiming in on this. I am debating going -- I need the practice in his language (which is my 3rd; I speak it fluently but have few friends here who speak it, so that alone is a beneficial reason for me to go just to stop by). I am trying to think of a good reason I can only stay an hour on a Saturday night though :-) heh.

Anyway back to the chart. If the planets are in Saturn, and that's bad for me -- OK that makes sense. But if i am conjunct spica -- how does that reflect on this question? I mean if that's the case for me in this chart, then wouldnt it be positive for me if i go (related to this guy or not, i mean), and counteract Saturn?

If I'm the moon, peregrine, no power to act, it means i have no influence in this case (if i go to the party). OK...and i wonder what this New Situation in his life now is. Hm. Does it hint at woman or could it be anything, ie, job change, move, health, whatever?

misskitty · #4 09-09-2010, 02:44 AM

Sorry I had to edit my statement above once I realized there was mutual reception.

Yes, I believe you should definitely go! I added this above: With the new Moon in Virgo the other day, and with all the activities affecting all Virgos lately thanks to the past Saturn/Uranus oppositions and now Merc Rx-- it is very possible that he is just in the middle of reorganizing his life. Attempt to get to know him anyway... just because the timing isn't right at the moment doesn't mean it won't be right later on...

KatyaVelikaya · #5 09-09-2010, 02:47 AM

OK! Good news. Now I just have to pull myself out of this funk somehow and hope I can come across as attractive and charming. At present, it feels like an impossible order...

KatyaVelikaya · #6 09-14-2010, 04:25 AM

Wanted to post an update. (!!)

BBQ Man - things went VERY well. He paid a ton of attention to me and likewise I found myself asking him tons of questions -- there's some weird electricity in our communication that makes it smooth, natural but constant and really engaging. I can't explain it. It's like brain heat or something. Anyway, he invited me to two things in the course of the evening, one is a lesson in a sport/art form he does and the other is to the symphony in november. I wrote a thank you by email today and will see if/when he replies. I REALLY hope this does not just fall into oblivion for no reason, I REALLY hope it was not just empty words..> It sure didnt seem that way at the time. I have been on cloud nine for the past 48+ hrs as a result, a huge shift from my mood of the past 3 weeks.(!) I am fully smitten. He fits me in so many ways -- and I learned on Saturday that his initial education was in the same specialized area as mine (although now he is a scientist). It is uncanny how much he fits my profile of dream man. A far cry from the disaster I ended earlier this summer!!

I am hesitant to ask any more questions bc I am very afriad of bad news but i also wonder if a repeat question will be essentially the same as the one I asked (about something building?) Or could it be concluded that since he asked me out, Yes something is building, and I can ask another question about frequency or his intentions and it would not violate or repeat the first chart?

Hugs to all.

KatyaVelikaya · #7 09-22-2010, 05:11 AM

I have a question -- how long is this initial reading valid for? One week? Three weeks? Or 3 mos?

I would like to ask another question because things seem to have done ...well not a 180 but a 90-degree turn at least. The wife of his best friend just finished dissuading me from showing any interest or wasting any emotion on him... i have no idea where this is coming from bc she was gung ho about it all on Saturday...

Anyway I want to ask another question on this topic but not sure if it's OK time-wise to do so yet?

dr. farr · #8 09-22-2010, 05:36 AM

From the Ankara tradition, with Scorpio on the ascendant the basic time period for this chart is 4 weeks.

I would say (my opinion) that in about 1 week the time could be appropriate for a similar question, based on the latest possible changes to the situation shown by the actions of the wife of his best friend toward you involving him...

KatyaVelikaya · #9 09-22-2010, 05:39 AM

OK thanks Dr. Farr. I will try to wait another week, if I don't have a blatantly negative answer in my lap before then. I do not understand what's going on, but it doesnt feel positive anymore....

misskitty · #10 09-22-2010, 12:52 PM

I personally don't think you need another horary until you have more information. Haven't you just flat out asked her for her reasoning? It is not fair on her part to just dissuade you without giving valid reasons. Otherwise, I wouldn't take her seriously (sounds like she is playing games!) and you should follow your own instincts.

KatyaVelikaya · #11 09-22-2010, 03:21 PM

I did ask. But her reasoning was kind of vague. She said she thinks he is unreliable and his moods change often and she gave me 1 vague example of that when he was supposed to babysit their dog while they were on vacation, and she reminded him last minute and he got upset. (?) And then she said one other woman made the same comment about him one time. And she said I should not show too much interest and pull back (duh this much i know). She just said that maybe i'm attracted to him externally (It is much more than that in fact) and I should step back. Again - it doesnt mesh with Saturday... She said she thinks he knows i'm interested and i should let him come forward. OK. I agree. But then what?

We were initially, I thought, all going to meet again this Saturday to repeat last week's event: a shared sports lesson with him as trainer, hang out in the park, then dinner together). But his email said it would be best if we (all) took the official (paid) lesson from the trainer so we dont have to take turns w/His equipment. She and her husband are not going this Saturday. My arms still hurt from last week, so the "waiting" was actually necessary. I am interpreting this as he doesnt want to teach and wait around for everyone for 5 extra hours (dont blame him) but also that he doesnt want to see ME, per se.

Some friends say i should go, pay for the lesson (even though its at the godawful crack of dawn) and show less interest in him. Others say just bail completely, be busy.

I am utterly confused but have to reply today. Obviously i'm not that much of a sports fanatic and if he werent there i would not be going at all. So part of my logic says then i shouldnt go at all, bc he hasn't invited me to spend time with him exactly...

misskitty · #12 09-23-2010, 12:50 AM

Unreliable and his moods change often... welcome to the land of Virgo!

They are by far one of the more difficult signs to date and to read. I have two pieces of advice. 1. follow your heart. It sounds like you have too much advice flying at you from all sides. What do YOU feel like is the right thing for YOU to do? What will make You feel strong and happy? You will attract him by those qualities in yourself. 2. study up on Virgos through the more reliable horoscope sites or books. I recommend the Sextrology book. It will help you know what you are "in" for. I've been in love with a Virgo with a Gemini Moon for two years, but he sure can drive me batty at times.

KatyaVelikaya · #13 09-23-2010, 01:19 AM

That bad??

Actually my sister's husband is Virgo and he's far from moody. He's very stable and always upbeat, tons of energy. That is the same as I saw in this guy -- lots of energy (esp mental). LIke i'd mentioned earlier in the thread, sparks of conversation, you could almost see them.

But his heart and emotions? No clue where they are.

What I think is right: to step back and not go on Saturday bc it will show too much interest.

What I want to do: go on Saturday bc I want to see him.

However, this is not a date. And if i go for the "lesson" we're not interacting for those 2 hours. You can't much talk while doing the sport, only between exercises or in breaks. OF course i'd see him slightly more than if i dont go at all, but he hasn't asked to see *me*. When he wrote he suggested we all take the lesson. Which to me was a clear "I do not feel like you guys using my equipment and me watching for 4 hours after my lesson". I dont blame him. But if he was/is interested, he could also invite me to do smthing else.

Also from the time he wrote this, I"ve clarified that the other 2 people aren't going. At first I thought that was a plus. But not given the "lesson" issue.

It is complicated by the fact that i do not expect him to start asking me on DATES immediately. He hardly knows me. And he has been burned badly in the past. So the "lesson" is a good excuse for exposure to each other. Except that it's hardly interactive and since he's so serious about this sport, his attention will not be on me.

So i think that gives me my answer: I decided to tell him I can't make it this saturday. If he's interested, he will come forward. I pray.

(P.s. Venus Retrograde has clearly already begun!)

misskitty · #14 09-23-2010, 03:42 AM

Of course sun sign is only a start and the other planets will influence it, but very generally Virgos are more reserved and do prefer to get to know someone in informal group settings before they stick their necks out and ask for a date. This is veering away from the horary at hand, but I think you are doing the right thing by following what YOU think would be right. Pass the Venus Rx reading up (I strongly recommend Venus and Mars on a Date by John Gray). Good luck!

KatyaVelikaya · #15 09-23-2010, 03:49 AM

Thanks Misskitty. I"m glad you approve, bc it's scary as heck. And I doubt myself a lot. But I already sent the "cant make it message" and am telling myself it's over -- he will not pursue or ask me for any other meeting. bc like you said, its not safe for a Virgo to do so. It is too bad, but better to not be invested, to mourn the possibility now rather than drag it out. I just got OVER a broken heart. I really can't deal with another one now... It still hurts though, which is the bad part. I really like him.

Its unlikely there will be more group casual dates if the friend and his wife are not attending these classes (Her husband works with him and is going out of town for the weekend). Who knows if they will go NEXT Saturday but i already have plans for that day. Anyway.... I have to try to forget now. :-(

[I think i already have Venus/Mars on a Date! As well as many other similar books. Ha -- shows you that despite all the help, i'm still a lost cause

]

KatyaVelikaya · #16 09-27-2010, 03:46 AM

I know you said to ignore the Venus retrograde, but I have been told and reminded of it time and time again in recent days and I have to ask this. As I understand it, it means no new relationships will progress forward. Old flames come forth, existing relationships move forward or die, but no new seeds planted. I am wondering first of all, how cut and dried that is, i mean how "new" does a new seed have to be if you've spent approx 16 hrs with a person already.

However there is something going on with Mars now until Oct. 18 that incites people to action. So it would seem in theory that that Mars effect could "undo" the Venus freeze slowness, no?

In any case on Tuesday --or after i hear from him next-- I wll be asking another horary! I fear I scrwed things up again with my last message to him on Friday. I was polite but vague, mirroring his polite but vague message... I feel i'm walking on eggshells and am so scared he will disappear. I know all this Venus Rx stuff says nothing develops and people question issues. But i'm not questioning -- i want to see and spend time with him. I feel like this other girl and his own unclear actiosn are what's meddlign it up. Am i not under Venus' influence or something? I dont get it.

dr. farr · #17 09-27-2010, 04:12 AM

In the Ankara horary tradition Venus rx does not automatically mean that love and friendship cannot go forward; it rather points to a lot of internal conflicts, doubts, defiance and rebelliousness in matters of the heart, and, once a person is aware of these cosmic influences, they can take the "Venus atmosphere" of the time into account and make adjustments to modify and correct and even benefit from these Venusian currents, and not fall victim to them!
...and all of us are under Venus influence-and Mars-and Saturn-and the Moon-and all the rest. To understand what those influences are, what they imply, their ramifications, and then, knowing this, to adjust ourselves and by our knowledge, heart and will, make the best of those influences, direct them toward our own enhancement-to me, that's what astrology is for...

KatyaVelikaya · #18 09-27-2010, 04:21 AM

Thanks Dr. Farr. It makes sense to me. But i also feel I can adjust all I want and bend over backwards, and if someone else is being more cautious and muted than usual due to the Venus Rx influences now, I can't make them less so, I can't influence their actions. And it's REALLY frustrating to sit and watch knowing what (I think) is causing it and being helpless, relatively speaking, to do a thing about it until January comes.

The scandal parts, well I have this woman created a stew of problems, so that fits.

The only thing i can think of (in my situation) to combat this is to be
--more clear
--openly receptive without pursuing/chasing/aggressive behavior
--positive and encouraging (by being receptive). Beyond that i cant think of how else to combat the Rx effects. . .

dr. farr · #19 09-27-2010, 04:26 AM

You may be pleasantly surprised by what taking the actions you have mentioned at the end of your post, might do! Especially action #3: positive, encouraging, receptive...BE LIKE Venus, in your relationship with another, and Venus rx will be neutralized: this is a practical astrological fact!!

KatyaVelikaya · #20 09-27-2010, 04:28 AM

Hmm Ok. Well -- to be truthful, being encouraging *is* being proactive. It's kind of a soft opposite of being receptive. Receptive: receiving only. Encouraging: receiving and indicating you're open for future receptivity too etc. (or something like that).

I *didnt know* that being LIKE Venus now would neutralize the Rx. If that's the case, my email this week is going to be VERY WARM :-).

KatyaVelikaya · #21 09-28-2010, 04:32 PM

Ok here we go. I actually have several questions, so I hope to get as much info from this chart as possible.

The main question is what is His interest level in me?
The secondary question is what is the purpose of these sports sessions? (I ask bc last week he suggested we all take a lesson...which to me was a cold shift. Bc if we're taking the lesson (and he is too) we're not interacting as much as if we meet together after he is done with his weekly lesson).
And the third question is the girl's role in all this -- to confirm he's not into her...which i kind of dont think he is.

I am also interested in any communication signs coming from him today/this week.

Here's the chart. I just missed early Ascendant so i think this is fit to judge.

misskitty · #22 09-28-2010, 11:27 PM

This is WAY way too soon after your last chart. Even in your last chart, it was still a bit soon because you had already asked a question about him. It doesn't matter if the question is slightly changed. We have been having a lot of people here ignore this rule, but it is one of the main rules of horary. Don't ask question after question. The last chart (will anything develop) will HAVE this answer already. I seriously doubt this chart is valid. Sorry.

KatyaVelikaya · #23 09-28-2010, 11:38 PM

Ohhhkay. No worries. I thought I could. Its been 4 weeks...

Are there ANY variations on this theme? Can i ask when he's going to contact me next? I'm kind of panicking over here ...

Serendipity · #24 09-29-2010, 12:20 AM

Uh oh, someone has created multiple charts

I didn't look at that 3rd chart but the first and second charts look like a no.
First chart both significators are in detriment and Venus not only has to change signs to perfect the aspect it has to go thru Saturn in order to do it. Prohibition. Saturn is restricting this.
2nd chart and both significators are in detriment again and separating....and the Moon is peregrine and trying to break away from the Sun.

KatyaVelikaya · #25 09-29-2010, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Uh oh, someone has created multiple charts

Sorry

Quote:

I didn't look at that 3rd chart but the first and second charts look like a no.
First chart both significators are in detriment and Venus not only has to change signs to perfect the aspect it has to go thru Saturn in order to do it. Prohibition. Saturn is restricting this.
2nd chart and both significators are in detriment again and separating....and the Moon is peregrine and trying to break away from the Sun.

I have only done 2 charts so far on this question. The second is just 2 or 3 posts above. The first was 4 weeks ago.

But regarding your feedback:
Shooot...

(edited to add: oops, i see what you mean by 3 charts. I was referring to the 2 only on this thread. Yes there was one done in August on this topic).