A lot is going on in my life right now. I have a extremely low self esteem and a stutter and I'm about to start my first job where I will be thrown into the deep end and be forced to do a lot of things that are way way out of my comfort zone. I keep having nightmares of failing and looking stupid in front of my new colleagues. In fact, this seems inevitable.
To deal with this intense fear of failure and my fear of social situations, I've been really trying to get in touch with my feelings lately by questioning my beliefs and asking myself why I really act in certain ways.
And I guess along with that I have the sudden urge to write poetry. I guess its because I've been getting in touch with my emotions. Whatever the reason, I've never felt this way before and tell you the truth it feels kinda weird.
Pluto's conjunction with my ascendant is the best explanation I have for my feelings coming to the surface and I'm finding it unbearable to continue on the path that I have been going on for the last 10 years of my life. I see that uranus is going to be opposite sun in april next year which signifies more intense change. I'm really scared about what's gonna happen to me during the next 6-12 months. It appears as if I'm going to undergo a change in personality and I will undergo a lot of challenges during this period. This is all exciting but very scary at the same time.
Could you guys give me a little bit more insight about what's going on right now, and what to expect during the next 6-12 months in my life? I'm no astrology expert but I'm really trying to learn, so any help would be much appreciated.
Natal chart: http://www.astro.com/cgi/showgif.cgi...kh-u1246520996