Children in 5th???

LOL_LOL

Well-known member
Hi all:
I am new to this site. I came across this site while I was searching for some answers regarding children in my chart. I'm in a difficult situation in life now as I got married a year ago for the first time and after a year of marriage I filed for a divorce. I really love and want children (at least one), but I feel like life let me down as I am 29 now without a kid and getting a divorce now. I do not know when again I will get married and IF that will happen to me again....as well as when I will have a child, if I will have one. So it's like I'm feeling down and scared that I will not have a chance to have a kid again. I had a miscarriage once when I was 24 and got pregnant during that miscarriage for the 2nd time, but I had an abortion for the second pregnancy as I was seeing someone much older than me and he had drinking issues, so there was no future there.

With my husband...his father was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer so he went overseas for the past 5-6 months to be with his family, got a job there and is supporting his parents financially while I am sitting here and getting tired of all this waiting especially that my husband only seems to care about his parents. He also supposedly was going to sell his apartment overseas so that we could buy a place in the US and basically start a normal life away from my own parents as we were living with them for a year until he went to be with his dad due to the illness. Now he said that he can't leave his parents in this situation, so I feel like I have to sit around and wait until his dad passes away for him to return? Even in that situation, knowing that his mom only wants his son next to him, he will later say that he needs to be with his mom for a while before he could return......so it's like I am the least of his concerns now for which I no longer want to waste my time....I feel angry and let down by life basically. So this is my background a bit. My worry is whether or not I might have met the 'quota' for pregnancies (2 failed ones by miscarriage & abortion?) and drained that quota basically? I wish this is not the case. I would really appreciate if you guys could help me out by answering 2 questions 1) Will I get married again (or reconcile with my husband); 2) Will I be able to have children again in life? 3) If you see anything interesting for interpretation or anything that could be helpful for me, I would love to find out.


I will post my chart and the chart of my husband for you guys to see. I found certain correlation between our 5th houses, but I am NOT even close to knowing how to interpret charts, so I might as well as be wrong. This is why I am here...to get your assistance PLEASE.

This is what I found....
ME: 5th in Virgo (Ruler is Mercury)---> Mercury in Aquarius.
HE: 5th in Aquarius (Ruler is Saturn)-->Saturn in Virgo.


Not sure if this coincidence means anything for us.

ME: February 25, 1983 @ 10:45 a.m. Yerevan, Armenia.
He: October 6, 1979 @ EITHER 5:00 a.m. OR 5:30 a.m.
(There is a very slight difference between the position of a few plants I think.

I used the astro.com house default system and not the equal system...not sure which one matters. Again, thank you for your assistance in this...I wish i could have just posted the whole chart in my thread like some of you do it, but not sure how it's done.
 

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LOL_LOL

Well-known member
I should also add that both of our Junos are located in 10th house.....if this makes any difference. I would appreciate if someone could please shed light on this for me please....you could say that I am desperate :(
 

waybread

Well-known member
LOL, please don't take my answer as definitive.... I believe children are in God's hands, not an astrologer's. I only go so far as to suggests that some things are likely or unlikely to happen, and what you might do about them. By the same token, there is no pre-ordained "quota" on pregnancies. Unless your doctor says otherwise, there should be no reason why you cannot have children in the future.

First of all, I hope you will communicate very clearly with your husband. Does he or does he not wish to be married to you? If so, does he want you to return to Armenia to be with him? If not, does he want a divorce? Does he want children and to be a father? Has he effectively abandoned you? If he needs some time to think over these questions, fine; but you should probably set a limit on it.

Second, would you be able to go to Armenia for several months to be with your husband? If you were to become pregnant and then needed to return home to the US, Would you prepared to raise a child as a single mother?

I would say that your chances for becoming a mother are good, although not strongly so. The ruler of your 5th house of children is the sun (with Leo on the cusp.) Although the sun is not a particularly fertile planet, it is in the sign of Pisces, which is a fertile sign.

Your husband's potential for children looks a little weaker. His 5th house is ruled by Saturn, which is not so strongly placed in Virgo, and squaring Neptune. This might indicate having a child later in life. With his sun-Pluto opposing his moon in the 8th house, the pending death of one or both parents would seem to affect your husband strongly. In a sense, his father's illness resonates with your husband on a personal level, in a way that marriage and his own family does not.

I also do not believe that "life" cheats anybody. We all make choices that sometimes turn out negatively for us. This is part of the cost of being human. They key is to move on past life's inevitable disappointments, and choose to make the best of each day, one day at a time.

In the meantime, see if you can spend time with young children, either as a volunteer, special aunt, or neighbour. Perhaps you can donate time or some funds to children in poor countries overseas or in your own inner city neighbourhood. I think the universe notices when we take deliberate steps to bring more of what we want into our lives.
 

LOL_LOL

Well-known member
Thank you so much for the brief interpretation of our 5th house. He actually moved to Russia...Armenia is only his place of birth. He does not want a divorce and wants children, but what he does show me is a complete disregard of my own wants/needs/wishes and he seems to only care about his parents' and sister's well-being. Basically, even now he tells me that he will return, then another minute claims that he can not leave his parents during this difficult situation. He tells me that if I was a good wife, I would wait for him as long as needed, I would not demand that he sells his real estate there so that we could buy a place in here to move out of my parents place, although this was his own plan when he left the US. Anyways, so whatever he does is ONLY in the interest of his family there and I should just 'go along' with everything and agree to anything....this isn't working for me. For example, in my own family, my dad has a great relationship with his family (especially his mom), BUT when it comes to choosing or anything else in life, me and my mom have always been #1 for him. So basically this is the type of environment I've been brought up in when a husband and a wife are a unit and both consider each other #1.

So I get really annoyed that I have to sit around and wait God knows how long to see what happens with his father. I understand his situation, but this isn't working for me. If I knew that at least he's taking care of his real estate on the side to return with money as he promised me, I would obviously wait knowing that he's also thinking of our future and our needs, but this way he and his family do not want me to make any depends of my own and just sit and wait for I do not know what. His mom got involved in his decision to sell his real estate and basically does not let him do that, she's so controlling that does not even want him to return to the US claiming that if he goes back then he is a traitor. I would say his mom is #1 problem in all of this too.

This is why I wanted to understand if both of our 5th houses mean anything or not. What I am wondering is what a late child means for him if he's 32 now? How late is late in his case? Perhaps closer to 40 after our divorce, since it won't be me who gives him the child. I just hope that my life works out positively in terms of having a child and remarrying as being alone rest of my life would be the end of it for me. May I also ask if a 2nd marriage is seen for me? This was the 2nd marriage for my husband as he got married for a few months when he was 18 years old, so he should be looking at his 3rd marriage. Seems like his marriages do not last long :)
 

waybread

Well-known member
LOL, I sometimes joke that I am an amateur astrologer, not a fortune-teller or medium. I don't have a fatalistic, deterministic view of life. I don't believe that the script for your life was completed the moment you were born. I believe, rather, that astrology deals in probabilities and possibilities, but that you always have choices to make, and that these choices influence future outcomes in your life.

Many Vedic (Hindu) and traditional western astrologers feel differently, and if you contact one of them, he or she may be able to give a more definitive answer to your questions. You might also try one of the horary boards. It goes by the moment of the question, rather than your birth moment. Try posting some of your questions on the horary boards , one per message, and hopefully you will get some replies. Horary astrology does deal with "yes or no" types of answers; although not so much the specific timing of events. However, this is not a type of astrology that I practice.

I do try to pay attention, however, to what people write in their posts. You haven't responded to my recommended questions. While you are not obligated to do so, I encourage you to take them to heart.

One thing I notice is that you have given no indication of being willing to move to Russia to be with your husband, even if your in-laws and leaving the US are part of the package. [Sorry that I assumed Armenia, but your charts indicate it is where you both were born.]

I would encourage you to consult a divorce/family law lawyer about your situation-- possibly some immigration issues are involved, as well. For example, if you and your husband have not had sexual relations for a long period of time and if he has effectively left the United States for the foreseeable future most US states would view this as reasonable grounds for divorce. This would particularly be the case if your husband does not contribute to your financial support. If he has effectively abandoned you and does not want you to join him overseas, a lawyer can advise you on how to proceed.

One other thing I haven't seen you mention is love in your relationship. Rather, you seem to feel bitter and cheated; and your husband seems preoccupied with his life overseas, with no indication that he would like you to join him. Nagging your husband by long-distance is not going to make your relationship any closer. Nor is his lack of consideration for your feelings.

Your husband has a "double" sign (Pisces) on the cusp of his 7th house of marriage, which is often interpreted as indicating two marriages for someone. With Pisces' modern ruler Jupiter in the 12th house and its modern ruler Neptune squaring Saturn, I get the feeling that your husband is clueless about marriage. It is something your husband would seem not to understand very well. While this doesn't mean you cannot get back together again, I don't think you can expect him to suddenly become thoughtful, caring, and able to meet your expectations about marriage. I imagine death is something he thinks about a fair bit, and consequently the situation with his parents is actually more aligned with his inner motivations and personality than are marriage or fatherhood.

With Jupiter conjunct Uranus in your 7th house of marriage (trining your Venus-Mars and squaring your sun) you would seem to love the initial onset of love and romance, but then become very volatile and changeable about it. With Scorpio on the cusp of your 7th house of marriage, you have the capacity to be "fixed" and loyal in a relationship, yet your moods and feelings often change (Pluto-Saturn square moon) for the worse, and you feel a lot of internal pressure to make your marriage different from what it is on the basis of the facts (Uranus square sun.)

I would suggest at the moment that you take a very hard-headed and realistic look at your situation and your options. If your husband wants you to wait for him in the US yet if he has no plans to come back himself, he has to realize that your options are for you to either join him in Russia, or for you to get a divorce so long as a long-distance marriage and no plans for parenthood are his idea for your future, but not yours.

Unfortunately, sometimes life doesn't work out like the fairy tales, "happy ever after."
 

LOL_LOL

Well-known member
Thank you. I will definitely try the horary and the vedic boards in here. I am not familiar with the horary system though, but will learn more :)

In terms of missing out on your previous questions, I am not sure which ones I missed out on as I thought I already answered them. Will look back and see what I missed. Regarding my move to Russia, all I can say is that there is an issue with his mom, so even if this happened, we would have to rent a separate place on a temp basis.

His mom is basically unbearable in many ways. I noticed this within a week of being married to my husband as his mom used to call him on Skype 3 times a day for around 3 hours of 'blah blah blah sessions' every single day of the week. At some point this became unbearable for me. Once we were on our way to Vegas in the morning when she called him asking why he is not on Skype as she was really worried (crazy!) not seeing him online in the morning, so after a 30 minute talk on the phone, my husband said his good-bys and hung up, then she called right away wanting to talk more, so that continued for another 5 minutes after which my husband hung up again, then she called right back again wanting to talk to her son. She later called in the evening around 10 pm to talk again and her talks are really about nothing.......to say that they actually talk about something important/meaningful for that long would be wrong.

I understand that his mom misses him and was against his move to the US (or anywhere that's far from her) since the beginning (before even knowing me), but she has this control and influence over him, which i do not get and it annoys me that I ended up with a mama's boy. My husband is very nice and claims that parents are the most important thing in life and that no one should talk down on them, so this is the type of an environment I think he grew up in where he is supposed to listen and respect parents no matter what. On the contrary, I am very outspoken with my parents and god forbid they say something that's against my wishes...I'm very independent in that sense and nobody tells me what to do in my family. His mom even used to dictate him what steps to take regarding his own career, what to do, etc. She has him in her grip, which I never liked and it annoyed me as she had no right to become involved in anything, especially from overseas. I even got angry once asking my husband if he or his mom might drop dead if only for one day...just one day...both of them do not talk on Skype. He claimed that his mom is like that and he can't do anything about it, but I argued against that as the change has to come from him in the first place, especially when that annoys him too. I found it really annoying and manipulative that a grown woman would sometimes cry seeing her grown son via Skype and blaming him of his "abandoned" of her (she has a daughter next to her though), and what a bad son he is lolol.

Now that he's back in Russia, she's claiming that it's due to him being away and all the stress of the parents that resulted in his dad's cancer....this is the craziest thing I have ever heard and I feel that she's manipulating my husband so that he would feel guilty and stay next to them. Basically, she does not like me as I refused to continue the 3 hour sessions with her and see her cry and hear her blah blah blah after the 2nd week of our marriage. What I hated the most besides the unnecessary length of their conversations was the saying good-bye part as it was the hardest thing to do.....she simply would not go away. Our good-bye's lasted for another 30 minutes lol! She does not understand that people have things to do and not everyone is the blah blah blah type to sit around for hours and listen to cries and her 'suggestions' as to what we should do. Even my own parents did not seem to understand this type of a behavior/relationships seeing it as damaging for her son's manhood. Speaking of manhood, she also once asked my husband how is he taking care of his 'manly responsibilities as a husband' which was the end of it for me. I was so angry that the woman just can not mind her own friggin' business by taking care of her sick husband in the first place instead of sticking her nose where it does not belong. The part that drove me crazy was that my husband told me about this with a laugh...as if it's perfectly normal for a mom to ask that.

After my husband left, we got into an argument for about a week when his mom hindered our plans (more like my husband's plan in the first place) in regard to the sell of his home, and knowing that she messed it up for us by convincing my husband that if he sells the house and buy a place in the US instead, he might as well as loose his wealth. I am sure you know what she meant by that, so I got angry and wrote my husband an e-mail with a few negative things said about his mom, and out of anger told him that if your parents have a home of their own in the same city, why the hell are they at your place, since they are #1 reason that he changed his plans about his house. I told him to kick them out! LOL. I know I should have not said this, but I got really fed up with his mom...be it while my husband was still here and especially after he left. Later my husband told me that his mom accidentally read that 'aggressive' e-mail of mine and was really angry at me. Now I can not go to their place as my husband said that it would be impossible knowing that his parents are sensitive and he does not want any scandals at home. I do not even want to go there myself as I can not survive in the Russian winter and I do not want to be sitting at home next to a sick father, crazy mom and not see my husband due to his work from 9am-8pm.

If you look up, I also said that my husband could have been born at 5:30 am (posted the 2nd potential chart), which placed his moon in 7th house. Maybe if his birth time is in fact 5:30 am and his Moon is in the 7th, that would explain his mother situation. If you take 5:15 am (half way from 5-5:30 am), you could see that his Moon falls right in the middle of his 7th/8th house cusp. Only with the 5:30 time that he falls in the 7th house. If possible, would you mind briefly interpreting the Moon in the 7th assuming that he is closer to 5:30 am instead of 5 am. Unfortunately, not even my husband knows his right birth time, but knows that it's between 5-5:30 am.

What I wish is that he could be more independent in terms of 'influences' as he's very 'influential'. He might say one thing, then his mom says another and he changes his statements according to what his mom says (or other people too). He is not consistent in his plans and intentions. He does not want to get a divorce and says that he will return soon. Interestingly enough, he first told me he will return in March, then told me that he can not leave his parents right now as his dad was going to undergo his 2nd chemo at the hospital, so he had to be there until he got out. Meanwhile, when he planned to come, his mom called him a traitor if he leaves. So then he said he will return in April, but had a project coming up for him, which after a month of negotiation did not work out, so I told him that since he already stayed with his dad for 5-6 months, it's time for him to return. He agreed to buy a ticket at the end of this month, but after a day when I asked him about his return, he said that he can not leave his dad like that when he is supposed to start his 3rd chemo now and will only be able to return in a month. I am not betting on that month now either....seems like he can not get away from parents mostly because of his scandalous mom, and is trying to postpone his return as long as possible.

Anyways, I understand his family situation, but I am sick and tired of that drama. I have a drama-free family/parents myself; therefore, I really can not stand his mom now. Regardless of what I have written about his mom (what she has read), I still think that she should butt out as she is really hindering everything. As noted previously, I am an independent individual and in most cases I do not have parents get involve in what I do (unless it's some huge issue or something), so I am so irritated that someone from overseas is messing things up and being so manipulative (although pretending to be sensitive). I remember how she was making my husband feel bad about the fact that he did not financially help/support them for about 2 years. Now that 5-6 months have passed since my husband went back for a temp visit and has found a job there to support himself/parents during his stay, every single day almost, she reminds him how he did not support/help them financially even though now he is helping them out, but noooooo she can not forget the past 2 years. This makes me very angry and it makes me feel bad for my husband to be honest.

So this is the situation for us. We're perfect together in every sense, except that if he was more independent, consistent in his thinking and had a mind of his own, it would have helped this situation. I am sure that I am to blame for my e-mail regarding his mom, but the whole thing has gotten to me so much that I think that I would have been happy to say all that to her face instead. I would really appreciate if you could please take a look at the 2nd chart I posted for 5:30 am to see if his Moon in the 7th significantly changes things for him perhaps regarding his mom or future marriages for him. Thanks for your insights into this situation from the psychological perspective as well as astrological. :) I also apologize for rumbling on about this so much, but I have a lot of anger boiling in me right now, which I guess I had to relieve and find some meaning/understanding into this situation astrologically. I did file for a divorce, but it was more of a symbolic thing on my part to make my husband get it together. He was really angry, but I told him that I will cancel it once he gets things together overseas and makes up his mind as our divorce becomes official at the end of July. I told him that he has a few months left for it, but as you can see he still insists that he will return in a month...wonder what the excuse would be after a month...perhaps he will wait until the last minute of our divorce to come back. For the past week I changed my e-mail, my phone and closed my FB account and do not want any communication with him for a while...I thought about leaving our situation to God to determine what's for the best. The only thing I am concerned now is having a child in the future. I would hate to be married only once for a year and for it to be the last one...that would be sad, especially without a child. This is #1 concern/fear for me right now. I honestly do NOT agree that if my 5th house has no planets, that means that children are not important to me. I've read this somewhere, but this is definitely false in my case as it would be a dream for me to have one, since I am 29 now and do not want to wait for too long.
 

waybread

Well-known member
LOL, it is always a safe assumption that people are not going to change. If they happen to change for the better, it's a bonus, but don't count on it; especially as people age and become less flexible.

Perhaps you know the Spanish proverb, "God says, 'Do what you will, and pay the price.'"

My feeling is that if having a child with your husband is your top priority, move to Russia, even temporarily, and try to conceive one. If you have higher priorities, like staying in the US, then it is unlikely you are going to be happy with your husband so long as his family dynamic stays in place. I don't think further complaining is going to improve anything for you. I don't have further advice for you.

At some point, you have to look to yourself, not hope that an amateur astrologer on an Internet forum can or should play God in your life.

Good luck to you, LOL.
 
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