Depression

I really don't want to argue with you on a thread of a girl who could do with less hassle in her life, so if you must pursue this topic further, please keep your statements relevant to the OP question. Your use of a contradiction in this thread is irrelevant because the OP is aware that there are two sides to every concern which she has. For example, she is aware that she can fulfill something inside her by not eating, but she is also aware that her body needs food. Similarly, she is aware that anti-depressants can/do help some people. However I was concerned that she was possibly somewhat naive to the fact that, not only is this not the case for others, but that the usage of anti-depressants can actually make people worse, to the point I have mentioned above. To be clear, this is not an opinion, or a belief, this is, as I have clearly stated, a fact. I consider it highly relevant because it concerns the well-being of a vulnerable individual.


You know, it may be to her, the OP's, benefit, if she were to draw a horary to see if taking anti-depressants, or rather, psychotherapeutic drugs, would help her. Victoria, that is my suggestion to you. It seems imperative you strike a balance between taking control and accepting what you cannot control and need help with.
 

kimbermoon

Well-known member
To be clear, this is not an opinion, or a belief, this is, as I have clearly stated, a fact. I consider it highly relevant because it concerns the well-being of a vulnerable individual.

Again you avoid answering the questions posited to you. I have no wish either to debate or argue about what does and does not constitute facts

So, if you look you will see that I did not say personal experience is irrelevant. No however you did imply that my sharing of personal experience was irrelevant to the post, which I do disagree with.

I assume that you would not... you know what they say about making assumptions... It is important to consider the facts when making a decision about psychotropic drugs. Indeed, but do you have all the facts, as presented by both sides?

Forgive me if I am wrong, but you would probably leave your judgement of these topics to the reports written by the 'people who know', that is, doctors: indeed you are very wrong

For that reason, when trying to help someone (including yourself), it is good to approach that whole enterprise with an objective mind set, and not one borne out of deeply subjective, personal, emotional, experience. again you misunderstand in thinking I am not being objective for I certainly am.....

Again this has gone way off the track of offering assistance to Victoria, which is what my original intention was...apparently my input has been deemed invalid by you though, and thus I shall speak no more on the issue.. consider me off the thread so go on, and continue carrying your own torch, as you will
 
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Victoria

Well-known member
Oh dear... I was just cheking in to see if anyone had been kind enough to help me with this issue, and instead, you people attacking one another.
Not helping me, not helping yourselves.
If you wan't to fight or argue, please take that somewhere else.

Kimbermoon, PLEASE don't leave this forum.
Try not to focus on all of that.
I have read all of your comments and I will comment on them later.

I really don't have the energy to be dealing with this now,
and I'm sure you all agree time si better spent, than sitting online looking down and fighting an eye for an eye. I don't mind if some people are pro meds. and some people are anti meds. -I do still have my own mind -

I can tell that ALL of your advice and help comes from a place of wanting me to stay safe, be protected and get well again. That is very toughing,
so please don't make a mess of this thread, for me.
Cause I'd like more advice and more help, and more openness.

Actually I have some news today,
But since having written all of that,
I must say I am too tired to write anymore.

Please be patient with me.
I was planning on doing
will this depression last longer than 6 months -horary chart
*will antidepressions help me feel more stable - horary chart
Is my weight going to go up? - Horary chart.


Ps. I am made fully aware that these types of medisins can have a good outcome or a fatal outcome. It seems to be in my therapists opinion that I am so down now, that it will go up. Up to the stage of minor depression.
Not "lovehappyhappybunnyraindow" happy. So I'll still be in treatment, for a while.

Please stay with me, please don't leave, and It IS A VERY controversial
topic, and have some accept that there are people who have had very different views of such things, I'm a mercury libra. I like peoples views before I make up my mind. And I will make up my own mind.
If I didnt care that much I'd just swallow every pill and go to any hospital, but I came here and asked for your help.

so please stop being rude to each other.
Now I'm so exhausted I'm about to pass out, so please
don't make me do this again.
 

Claire19

Well-known member
Hello all.
Thank you so much for having a look.

My question is basically if i should accept a offer to go in hospital
to get treatment for my depression or not.
This is the biggest depression I've had in my life,
and now my 10 + year eating disorder is kicking up again.
I have gone 4 days without food, and I really don't have the energy to get up and shower and get dressed and go to the shop.
My therapist is worried I'll try and kill myself,
but the thing is, I had a friend who did that, so I would never ever.
And even though right now everything is hard for me, there has never
been anyone with more hope in life.

I'm worried going to the hospital will defeat me, and take away the last feeling of "I can do it" and also, it sounds pretty scary.
I don't feel lost, I just feel tired.

Is it possible to see why I feel like this in my chart?
Also, advice on what I should do is welcomed.

I've included natal and horary
Apart from your eating habits which of course is making you very lacking energy. Can you load a natal chart with your transits and progressions on it for now? You need expert hospital care and it is not a defeat, rather a brave thing to do, to trust that others will take care of you which is what you need. Your poor body needs nutriments.
 

Claire19

Well-known member
Again this has gone way off the track of offering assistance to Victoria, which is what my original intention was...apparently my input has been deemed invalid by you though, and thus I shall speak no more on the issue.. consider me off the thread so go on, and continue carrying your own torch, as you will
Please dont allow a poster on the forum to affect you as much as they are doing. They do not know you and I would avoid their criticism or comments. Easy to ignore.
 

Victoria

Well-known member
the worst part of this is that I started to see some innocence,
and i was starting to feel some joy from this..

I don't mean to make it all about me eughter, because these are questions many many people will have to ask themselves in their lives.

Please stop fighting, please don't pont your fingers.
This (out of all forums) is NOT the place for that.

Did PersephonesDawn seriously get banned for this??



Claire, how do i do a chart like that? i used to know it, but I cant remember
and also i am not kidding, - exhausted !!
Please tell me how I can do it?

Anyway,
I was born 29.08.89 at 08.18 in the morning
I was born in the city of lillehammer, Norway,
but I now reside in Oslo, norway



Please, all of you, i'd like for this to be a sharing and caring talk to one another, and please come back,
cause I'd love someone who can guide me thru the fog.
 
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Mandy

Well-known member
Everything anybody has said to Vix on this thread has been said out of sheer good will and kindness, even if people do have different perspectives on the situation. Kimbermoon, I was not "invalidating" your experience. The fact that anti-depressants have worked in your case is inherently valid and I am very pleased for you. In an attempt to clarify some facts, I seem to have stepped on your toes by my approach to this. I admit my approach was slightly forceful. My intention was never to pi*s you off and I apologise if this has been the result of my actions. I hope that you can accept my apology so that we can move on from a misunderstanding between two people who were both trying only to help. Peace?

[attacking comments removed - moderator]
 
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Victoria

Well-known member
Just to set the record straight.

I don't really eat, because food no longer tastes nice (!), - and because
not eating makes me feel like I still have some control over myself.
Depression is a fog you can't see through, but you can survive on litte food, you can not eat for a day, or two, or tree or more. So long as you drink alot (OBVIOUSLY I'm not saying anyone should do it! I KNOW it is very harmfull). I had a spell of anorexia nevrosa when I was 10-13 almost 14. I was very very underweight, malnurished, and very ill.
I am not underwaight now. I'm healthy, normally I eat, still there are some hangovers from that time in my life ( I don't like to eat in resturants, facing other people, or by a window ++)
In a way, yes, it is pleasurable to know I still have some control over myself, if not my feelings, than atleast my "cravings" if you can call it that.

I've uploaded a chart like you said, claire.


"Everything anybody has said to Vix on this thread has been said out of sheer good will and kindness, even if people do have different perspectives on the situation." - Mandy

I agree with you Mandy.
I know this is a very controversial issue, so the point I'd think,
is to provide people with your experiance and oppinions on the matter,
and then let the people (cause we all know, there are more than me in the world struggeling at the moment)
decide what they feel is best for them selves.
Thank you all, so far, anyways.
 

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serafin5

Well-known member
If I might offer, I agree that if you are experiencing suicidal ideation, and simply cannot cope, then a temporary stay in the hospital would be advised. I would share my personal experience:

I felt depression come on especially in my teen years...not for any specific reason, but simply because I felt ostracized, lonely, disempowered and extremely shy; easily intimidated. What I thought was love finally came to me in my senior year of high school, and the depression faded...finally I felt accepted, loved and re-empowered for a time...I thought I could just leave the depression behind...however through my years of maturity and being married with children, combined with a series of tragedies and death as I turned 30, the despair and yearning became stronger again, and I could not feel fulfilled in the marriage which was rather emotionally abusive. I decided to leave the marriage but what followed was a series of crisis, rather than a renewed sense of freedom. We learned that my mother had a critical heart problem and died a year later: my father was diagnosed with prostrate cancer soon thereafter and we feared for the loss of him as well; instead he fought against the cancer and two years later actually re-married, which caused some contention in some of my siblings; then seeing him through the process as the cancer spread until he too died 2 years later; within a day of the anniversary of Mom's death. There there came an onslaught of executing the will which brought out the worst in some of my siblings, and finally I had to extricate myself from them and actually move away...long story short, I was hit by a barrage of life draining experiences that pounded away at me on a continual basis. Just as I was about to hit 40, the anti-depressants were no longer working and I found myself falling apart in the doctor's office as an emotional wreck. Wisely she sent me to the ER for a psych evaluation, and I did manage to find some relief simply by being taking out of a highly stressful environment overnight.
I went through a period of being in therapy, which helped to a degree but the stressors kept building in my world and for a time I was on suicide watch as well. I finally got more appropriate treatments to treat the chemical imbalance in my brain that contributed to the depression. And then something magickal happened, and I found myself on the road to recovery through my own volition. It was a long and arduous struggle, but somehow I knew that I was the only one who could lead me to a complete healing.

In retrospect, I believe that the depression itself was part of a divine intervention construed to help me re-connect with my own inner divinity...it forces a person to really get to the heart of the matter of the internal goings-on that contribute to a depressive state of being...and that is what depression truly is: a state of being. Looking back, I see that the solution was always in my own hands, and while talk therapy was somewhat helpful, it was by my own doing that I ultimately found my resolution, and that was based on regaining a sense of faith and trust in life...and gaining the total belief in receiving support from my personal spiritual guides and muse.
The truth comes down to the fact that, 'as we think, so we become'...the solution then lies in changing our perceptions about life, restoring the sense of there being a universal plan: we must also find ways to change our state of being through the use of the directed mind; this involves changing our attitudes, our beliefs in negativity and defeat, as well as altering our judgments as well as our expectations in life. As within, so without, and it all starts from within.
I do believe that astrological counselling in depth can be as successful as traditional talk therapy. Your chart depicts that you are here largely to figure things out for yourself rather than to rely on others to fix your problems and correct your misunderstandings. Indeed you have repressed feelings of insecurity and worthlessness that need to be overcome but inevitabley the only validation that matters comes from ourself. When we expect it to come from others, we are typically sorely disappointed.
Currently there are significant developmental changes happening in your life, as shown by the heavy transits of significant planets like Pluto, Saturn and Uranus. Pluto relates to political restructuring, yet on a personal level it relates to whether one feels empowered in their own right or disempowered by others...the choice is ours to make...we can either submit to being a victim in life, or we can chose to be the victor...we all have that inner creative spark that can be utilized to change our circumstances, if we choose to make that our primary intention.

Such a beautiful post Kimbermoon thank you. Victoria I know that you've gotton a lot of really good advice as I haven't read all of the posts yet but I just wanted to share that I have been dealing with depression since I was in my late teens as well and I did try to kill myself, seriously too, and even though you say that you would never consciously not eating for 4 days is a slow suicide because it's not healthy to do that to your body. I know you already know that but please dont do anything foolish, please go to the hospital and PLEASE keep in touch with all of us as you will be in my prayers and thoughts OK?

Blessings to you always,
Serafin5
 

Jai Kishen

Well-known member
Well I have saturn conj moon in 7th house (according to whole signs) and I get depressed alot , for almost everything ...
but at the same time , when I stop thinking alot and start concentrating on work (studying , working out or anything ) I seem to gain back on my feet ~

so yea , may be even u might have the same problem ?


Suggesting,
Jai~
 

Victoria

Well-known member
Well I have saturn conj moon in 7th house (according to whole signs) and I get depressed alot , for almost everything ...
but at the same time , when I stop thinking alot and start concentrating on work (studying , working out or anything ) I seem to gain back on my feet ~

so yea , may be even u might have the same problem ?


Suggesting,
Jai~

It's sweet of you to think of me, darling <3 really, honestly.
I am not a dr. but I'd say our depressions are alot different.
For me.. I'm not thinkng when I am depressed, not wondering,
it's not painfull, in a way, it's just empty, slow and boring.
It's like being a flower longing for a new spring,
but being frozen and half dead under the snow.
There is nothing left. No concentration, no focus, no energy,
no hope, no way to ignore or get over this bubble you're in.

My last major clinical depression I couldn't get out of the house for
almost 6 months. Could only open the curtains at night, and for the
first month, i didn't even have the energy to lift my own body and go
and sit in the bathtub. So, i doubt very much that, for me, it's all about focusing on something else.
 

Victoria

Well-known member
Also, I have a question, hopefully you can find the answer on the transit chart provided earlier.


I'm wondering
will this major clinical depression last for more than 6 months?
 

Victoria

Well-known member
Is anyone still here?

I'm sorry I've been gone for so long, but I've been really bad lately.
I started on antidepressants two weeks ago, and it's been decided
I will be going to the hospital in about two weeks, for about a month.

I still don't feel any better. My therapist says it will be around two
more weeks until I start to feel any different, obviously I'm not saying,
or thinking, antidepressants will make me feel 100% fine, just a little
better, with therapy, and other help.

I've been sleeping so much lately, I've started eating again,
but my therapist is still worried if I might have vitamin deficiency.
So I'm wondering if there is any astrological aspect that indicates if this
is true or not. I would love more help, and this discussion to go on.

Also, any hints as to when it will get atleast marginally better..


I hope to hear from you all.
x
 
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dr. farr

Well-known member
One note: since December 2011 the SN has been transiting within a couple degrees orb of the progressed Moon (emotions, sensitivities, etc): from my perspective this indicates a likelihood of that period of time being an exacerbation of the psychological situation. The transiting SN will pass out of orb to the progressed Moon toward the beginning/middle of April, 2012, so, this might well indicate an improvement in this situation-and a continuing improvement-becoming noticeable around that time.
 

dhundhun

Well-known member
ASC lord Mercury is at the apex of T square and squared by Jupiter, Uranus, Saturn and Neptune. This can cause stress, anxiety, sometimes depression. Mercury usually finds its way and you should be able to figure out solution.

1st house (natal and then now progressed) was (and is being) transited by Saturn. At the same time Pluto was transiting over Uranus, Saturn and Neptune. This can bring transformation by putting at lowest ebb.

Mercury afflictions are helped by yoga, pranayama, etc. Also fermented food (kefir, yogurt, etc.) can be helpful.

Good luck.
 

Shanti

Well-known member
I am still here...



It may be good that you are in treatment on hospital.
As said in one of my earlier posts the horary chart that I converted to vedic pointed to hospital,
as 12th house indicators was affecting you in more than one way.

Now tr. Jupiter is trine Sun in 12th (hospital), which may show good descision to have help by experts (JU).



Ta hand om dig...
 

Victoria

Well-known member
The transiting SN will pass out of orb to the progressed Moon toward the beginning/middle of April, 2012, so, this might well indicate an improvement in this situation-and a continuing improvement-becoming noticeable around that time.


Dr. Farr - That is actually around the time when I will most likely
be out of the hospital, at least for a week or so.


Thank you for the advice, dhundhun.
I absolutely have no energy for yoga or an kind of fysical activity, yet.
But I'll try to get more of the food you mentioned.

Shanti, I've sent you a PM, but thank you so much for the help.




I can't say how touched I am by how much everyones helped,
and given me advice and been in contact with me to make sure
I'm allright.. Almost enough to make me smile.
You really are amazing people, all of you.
 
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