What in a chart would make a person cheat?

[smilingsteph]

Hello all...
I am asking what indicated in a chart would make a person more prone to cheating?
I myself have had the problem of having the best and then looking for something else, (not acting on it though) while thinking that there is more out there....Even to the point of being very secretive about my relationships so that one would think a door would be open with me....
I see this within myself and have never cheated it really bothers me and in my current relationship I am having problems..problems feeling like I am being smothered.....like I cannot breathe and I am thinking of terminating the relationship actually....I am confused...not to mention saturns return affect on me
Funny thing is, is that I have a venus in taurus in the second house, an other placements that make me want to have a secure meaningful relationship....could that mean that I want a secure meaningful relationship with more than one to feel secure????

Here is my chart with my current beau....And my chart included at bottom, any help is greatly appreciated!!!! :)
http://www.astro.com/tmpd/cmn8filey6pOkk-u1186845283/astro_w2gw_01_stephanie_p_hp.60352.21425.gif (http://www.astro.com/cgi/showgif.cgi?lang=e&gif=astro_w2gw_01_stephanie_p_hp.60352.21425.gif&res=63&va=&cid=mn8filey6pOkk-u1186845283)

http://www.astro.com/tmpd/cmn8filey6pOkk-u1186845283/astro_61gw_01_02_stephanie_p_s.60422.22661.gif (http://www.astro.com/cgi/showgif.cgi?lang=e&gif=astro_61gw_01_02_stephanie_p_s.60422.22661.gif&res=75&va=&cid=mn8filey6pOkk-u1186845283)

[freedomlover]

Steph,

You wrote:

I am asking what indicated in a chart would make a person more prone to cheating?
I myself have had the problem of having the best and then looking for something else, (not acting on it though) while thinking that there is more out there....Even to the point of being very secretive about my relationships so that one would think a door would be open with me....
I see this within myself and have never cheated it really bothers me and in my current relationship I am having problems..problems feeling like I am being smothered.....like I cannot breathe and I am thinking of terminating the relationship actually....I am confused...not to mention saturns return affect on me
Funny thing is, is that I have a venus in taurus in the second house, an other placements that make me want to have a secure meaningful relationship....could that mean that I want a secure meaningful relationship with more than one to feel secure????
Okay, been there myself. I have found that the smothered feeling comes from trying to commit before you are ready to commit. Venus in Taurus is very security conscious- and sensuous. I'd say your problem is that you have Uranus (r) exactly opposing it in Scorpio/8th house. 8th and Scorpio rule soul mate - deep emotional bonding. Uranus rules individuality and the need for freedom. So, you have a built-in "push-pull" around the subject. You will not be happy in a relationship until you have given yourself freedom on the inside.

I feel that your desire to "cheat" is synonymous with a subconscious desire for freedom - to "prove" that you are not "owned".

On the subject of freedom:
One thing that draws me is the Moon/Saturn conjunction in Virgo intercepted in the 7th. Moon/Saturn together often has to do with a lack of emotional bonding as a child. In Virgo, the emphasis could have been on the work you did instead, and/or an internalized critical mother. Also, maybe a lesson that you need to find what you are truly good at, and love to do - and do it.

You have Jupiter in Leo in the 6th, showing lots of joy in working and creative self-expression. However, the cusp is Cancer, so it is overshadowed by and disposited by the Moon, which of course, is intercepted in Virgo in the 7th, conjunct Saturn. Moon rules mother, and also childhood training. Perhaps you were "trained" to be someone other than who you really are, in terms of your talents, desires, etc. It would seem to point to a problematic relationship with your mother, or mother-figure.

Saturn in Virgo should be a big blessing to you, if you work with the energies from a position of awareness. I think Saturn enters Virgo something like September 2.

Hope this helps,

Freedomlover

[smilingsteph]

Freedomlover-
So very true...
I was trained to care for others, something I love to do!! Yet something that I feel I "need" to do...due to Virgo.....
My lack of parenting left me with the responsibility...something a child should not have to do
Not to mention the desire to have my mother approve and feel proud of me even though she was never there is strong...thus may be the reasons for doing things in my life that I really did not want to do...only did it to make her proud, in a sense...
Over the past year this desire has left...the desire to make her proud...thus may be the reasons as to why I want to finally break free of those bonds and be "myself" is why I want to change so much about myself...therefore, having a relationship with another individual is challenging, because I want to be accountable only to me and not to another in a relationship...
Freedom is something I am yearning for....something I need to really think about and bring into my current situation...
Thanks for the insight-

[Spin]

Stephanie, you also have Aquarius rising which emphasizes the freedom urge. Seems your life will be a balancing act between that craving for independence and the Venus-Taurus need for stability.

Also, from the comparison chart, it looks as if your current beau's Saturn is conjunct your Moon so you may feel emotionally restricted by him.

[lillyjgc]

Hi smilingsteph, Just thought I'd let you know your charts have expired, but I am thinking that planets in Aquarius and strong uranus can generate a great need for independence..Also taurus adds to this...My taurean daughters first sentence was "I do it on my self!" so a strong need to make one's own choices. My last ex had his virgo Sat conjunct my moon...I felt so sad and emotionally inhibited, like I was *alone* in the relationship- He always knew the best way to do things (Virgo very nitpicky), but when we broke up I felt a kharmic blow and saturn is, after all Lord of Kharma!
What would make people cheat? Lots of things:
weak venus (can't say no), strong neptune, strong mars..links to scorpio and the twelth house and/or eighth house.
Cheating can be a conquest thing, a revenge thing, a way of not committing to a relationship, sortof *having one's cake and eating it too*,,lots of things. Lillyjgc



Regards, Lillyjgc

[Lissa]

Hi there Smilingsteph,

I believe lots of Aquarian planets or a lot of emphasis on Uranus would be a part of a cheater's profile.Not everything in our chart is as clear as some astrology books/websites make it,e.g. Venus in Taurus is very committed and loyal to their partners.The charts have expired so I don't know if that's your case but if,for example,that Venus in Taurus receives harsh aspects(sometimes the trine can have the same effect to)from,let's say,Uranus,this would make that solid,steady Venus more unpredictable and desiring of constant excitment in relationship.Neptune can also be proeminent in cheater's charts,since the lower expression of Neptune has to do with lies and delusion.

Regards,
Lissa

[Morghana Stellara]

My ex has Libra Venus sextile Mars in Gemini, Gemini Rising and a Sag Sun/Neptune/Mercury conjunction. His Scorpio moon craves emotional security and stability, but he has stated on many occasions that he can't imagine being tied sexually to one person the rest of his life. He has admitted to physically cheating in every relationship he has ever been in, except with me, but I caught him in two situations where he had intentions of doing so.

So there - there's one profile of a cheater.

[byjove]

I was just looking for a thread on this and there are about 1,000 threads in horary asking about this, but this one might be better for discussion.

I have to politely disagree with almost everything that has been said. I'm male, and of all the men that I've known that have cheated and when men around me talk about sex, it is for none of those reasons. It is purely physical when it happens. Nothing philosophical, emotional, psychological etc. only physical.

I'm looking to learn more about sexual infidelity. Fidelity has always been a cornerstone of my relationship needs. The best I can come up with for my deep, deep need for mutual fidelity is my Pisces Venus - the natural romantic. I used to say this as a joke - I would like to instill a fidelity clause in my future marriage, but now I'm quite serious. Being cheated on would break my heart, I would never love again.

Would you look at the condition of Venus, Mars, rulers of the 5th and 7th, any planets in those houses and perhaps certain other outstanding features in the chart that might decide the true colours of a person?

[Curious Twinz]

Can someone please tell me why my ex boyfriend doesn't leave me forever? We were together for a year, the next year we had complications, and i ended it many times, anyway now it has been a month and a half that i ended again, cuz of the way he talked to me, i knew that he will still be in contacts in a month or two and yes it happened. He is texting me again, and i dont reply. I want to know this mysticism of me and him together. The first year i was very happy, but because my other ex who was still in my heart male born in Armenia Yerevan, 09.17.1983....i couldnt be with this guy fully and my first ex is the most and biggest issue of me not being with this man in question, or even want to be with anyone at all. I can't forget my first ex., not cuz he was the first, but because of our connection. Please tell me if my first ex will ever be back to me? ^^
And Please tell me, about my second ex is he my destiny? Is he playing? Whats going on? Why does he make mistakes goes, and then comes back again. He was born 11.11.1977 male, born Armenia, Yerevan dont know the time. My birthdate 06.14.1986 female born in Armenia, Yerevan at 4a.m
Thank you in advance!

[drakeismyhusband]

Venus in gemini=cheater! Doesnt matter who. They must love more than one person at a time. Never met anyone with this placement who doesnt cheat.

[Claire19]

Stephanie, you also have Aquarius rising which emphasizes the freedom urge. Seems your life will be a balancing act between that craving for independence and the Venus-Taurus need for stability.

Also, from the comparison chart, it looks as if your current beau's Saturn is conjunct your Moon so you may feel emotionally restricted by him.
Saturn conjunct Moon can also mean an emotional commitment and a sense of loyalty even if if is restrictive. He may be more parental or responsible towards you. Without saturn contacts to personal planets, a relationship does not last. They infer debts to be paid and maturity to be gained. Even challenging Saturn aspects can lead to a long association although not necessarily always happy.

[Claire19]

Venus in gemini=cheater! Doesnt matter who. They must love more than one person at a time. Never met anyone with this placement who doesnt cheat.
Most men will cheat if they get the chance and Venus in Gemini means an attraction to younger women for sure and to be stimulated and keep it fresh and not get bored. Perhaps more than one at a time such as twins. or schoolgirls. :biggrin: However it depends on the rest of the chart whether the person will necessarily cheat.

[Claire19]

I was just looking for a thread on this and there are about 1,000 threads in horary asking about this, but this one might be better for discussion.

I have to politely disagree with almost everything that has been said. I'm male, and of all the men that I've known that have cheated and when men around me talk about sex, it is for none of those reasons. It is purely physical when it happens. Nothing philosophical, emotional, psychological etc. only physical.

I'm looking to learn more about sexual infidelity. Fidelity has always been a cornerstone of my relationship needs. The best I can come up with for my deep, deep need for mutual fidelity is my Pisces Venus - the natural romantic. I used to say this as a joke - I would like to instill a fidelity clause in my future marriage, but now I'm quite serious. Being cheated on would break my heart, I would never love again.

Would you look at the condition of Venus, Mars, rulers of the 5th and 7th, any planets in those houses and perhaps certain other outstanding features in the chart that might decide the true colours of a person?
There has to be more than a mere Venus in Pisces which is more delusional and idealistic than realistic, for someone not to cheat.
I feel the Earth signs such as Capricorn and Taurus are much more likely to be loyal and have a sense of duty towards a partner. Saturn with Venus and Mars also the Moon may indicate a steadier outlook with love matters although necessarily a bit dull.

[Brea]

Uranus is definitely a common culprit I find in the personal lives of others. Venus square Uranus especially in the synastry/composite or natal. It's strange however that I personally have this aspect but I dont feel the urge to cheat, not even with my fiery impatient Venus. I attribute this to alot of earth in my chart because I love commitment (to the right people). My descendant is in Aquarius, so the only time I've never felt the desire to cheat was when my freedom was a problem, and my sexual/self expression was stunted. I'm much more prone to do them the honor of just getting rid of them rather than seek out another means of getting my needs taken care of.

[surrealsuburb123]

What about Venus in Saggitarius?
Also, what about in certain situations that may cause some people to cheat?
Like someone with Venus in Scorpio or Moon in Scorpio, that is probably more obsessive than loyal, might smother or be very serious in a relationship and is involved with like a Venus in Saggitarius or Gemini, who probably likes "space" in a relationship, might cause the latter to cheat? I'm not sure if I'm making sense :unsure:

I have Venus in Pisces and Moon in Scorpio, with Moon conjunction to Pluto and Venus square to Pluto, so the few relationships I've been in have been a big deal to me and I've been very obsessive in the relationship. And the guy had a Venus in Saggitarius and couldn't handle being "smothered' and me being over protective... so that didn't work out. :annoyed:

[byjove]

You know, I'm not surprised by what you said above ^^

There are many astrologers who are diametrically opposed to discussing parts of a chart like this, preferring the whole chart only. I disagree; what can be understood of the whole chart if the individual parts are not understood? For me, understand the parts then the whole.

Essentially, I think there is definitely a place for discussing Venus/Mars/Moon commpatibility, especially for relationships. I've Venus in Pisces, like you, and you mentioned V in Sagg, I dated my first one of those a few months ago, the first person to cheat on me! *I do not say that all V in Sagg will cheat* but there is a marked freedom need, for sure. Given your natals, I can totally see what it didn't work out. Venus isn't exalted in Pisces because she wants to sleep with everybody! She exalts in Pisces as the true romantic. Pisces influence is idealistic and aspirational, inituitive and very definitely romantic. If a V in Pisces cheats, I'd say there would be inner turmoil. With V in Sagg, I'd generally say no turmoil.

Also, I say this genuinely respectfully to those that fiercly impress the importance on whole-chart analysis only, I really believe that an essential incompatibility like a Venus in Pisces with a Venus in Sagg cannot be rectified by other placements, neither by his Moon touching her Jupiter or her Sun touching his Saturn...none of it! I see *these* people around me all the time - they have a relationship, but the romance is not there. If you investigate the chart you see the problem starts with the basics.

I just watched a marriage between a Venus in Aries man and a Venus in Pisces woman crumble to pieces. He never understood flowers, cards, dates, every year she needed them, every year she got angry and hurt when he was aloof to the matter. I just think that otherwise helpful trines and sextiles can't fill certain gaps.

[wintersprite1]

Reading through this thread I was surprised not to see Mercury mentioned. When a person cheats, they are in a committed relationship or at least the agreement of exclusivity. I tend to see the biggest offense with cheating is the deception, the lies, the breaking of an agreed partnership. May be it is my Aquarius Venus, but I would have the hardest part of cheating to deal with was that I was lied to and our agreement broken.

[Zarathu]

Venus in gemini=cheater! Doesnt matter who. They must love more than one person at a time. Never met anyone with this placement who doesnt cheat.

I hate to say it but your knowledge of astrology is due for an update. Its not that simple.

I have been married for 40+ years. I have Venus in Gemini. I have never cheated, nor would I even think about it. The lady in my life for the past 42 years is the LOVE Of MY LIFE and will remain until I die. No one else could ever come close.

[Zarathu]

Most men will cheat if they get the chance and Venus in Gemini means an attraction to younger women for sure and to be stimulated and keep it fresh and not get bored.

This is also an inaccurate portrayal, probalby on the choices of men which you may have made. There are many ways to stimulate a relationship, and the only way is not to get a new one.

Its simply not that simple, and I refuse to believe that I am the only exception to your rule. As a guy, I know lots and lots of men. In my 63 years, I knew personally only two that cheated. Your view is a severe prejudice, and you need to know that there is no astrology to support it. My father believed that no black person could sing on key. Its the same.

[wintersprite1]

Hey everyone,

Zarathu has brought up a valid point. The male bashing is sexist and needs to stop completely. I know I would be annoyed with a posting like " All women are bad drivers" or anything along that line. First, it is a generality, second it is sexist, and finally, people newer to Astrology reading on here may take the silly idea as a fact, and that would be unfair to them.

TK

[byjove]

Reading through this thread I was surprised not to see Mercury mentioned. When a person cheats, they are in a committed relationship or at least the agreement of exclusivity. I tend to see the biggest offense with cheating is the deception, the lies, the breaking of an agreed partnership. May be it is my Aquarius Venus, but I would have the hardest part of cheating to deal with was that I was lied to and our agreement broken.

I totally agree; deception, lies, breaking of a mutual agreement and hiding it...I think I could personally accept a Mercury that's wildly different to mine in a relationship, but I will indeed look out for any tendency to deception! :bandit:

[Caro]

for long term compatibility - good moon aspects. often you see married couples have the same moon as partner sun etc.

[Becca]

Venus in gemini=cheater! Doesnt matter who. They must love more than one person at a time. Never met anyone with this placement who doesnt cheat.

My first b/f's Venus is in Gemini, and he was loyal to me throughout our 6-year relationship. His Moon is in Gemini too, and so is mine.
I think that Venus in Gemini men want an intelligent, talkative and interesting girlfriend.

Somebody wrote about Venus in Pisces. My two exes were Pisces with Venus in Pisces, and they were very romantic and committed. They wanted to take me everywhere and introduce me to everyone they know.

Just because a person is sociable, we can't jump to a conclusion that he/she will be unfaithful too.

[Centaur carrying Phoenix]

ByJove - I agree - my husb.has Venus in Aries - he never remembers Anniversaries etc - I have Venus in Scorp....:pouty:

[Elmo]

I think I have a general understanding that Moon in Gemini is most likely to cheat. Like my dad. And my Taurus mom was faithful to him 'til he died.

[byjove]

ByJove - I agree - my husb.has Venus in Aries - he never remembers Anniversaries etc - I have Venus in Scorp....:pouty:

I wonder if talking to the person helps at all. The best one can do, as I've explained to my brother who is following the same pattern with his partner, is trying to explain that romantic gestures matter. I casually warned my brother not to forget cards, flowers, treats with his partner who clearly, really, appreciates them and upsets her when he forgets.

[byjove]

I think I have a general understanding that Moon in Gemini is most likely to cheat. Like my dad. And my Taurus mom was faithful to him 'til he died.

That's something that scares the life out of me, as a very romantic and committed person, finding out that I've been cheated on is harder than death. Yep, I mean that. I try not to let astrology override the natural dating process when I meet someone, a lot need to occur without intellectual interruption, but later, I find it very important to find as much compatibility as possible to avoid disasters.

[Elmo]

Actually, I think that maybe he didn't cheat during the marriage, but Gemini Moons might have a roving eye. And he traveled all over the world, so I don't know. He was a pastor.. so, he said he was devoted, and I'd like to believe him.

[Clinton Soule]

SmilingStepH and Forum brethren,

I don't think it so much about our 8th:mars:(sex), Our natal 7th:venus:(relationship), or our 5th:sun:(romance) as it is our 9th:jupiter:(ideals, faith, philosophy, religion, our higher mind aspirations) that makes us loyal or not.

Of course after you read and study Sepharial's Astrology and Marriage you come to understand some are stronger than others in their devotion, and some are not.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/125720701/Astrology-and-Marriage-Sepharial

The last page of this document says it so well:

Matrimony is after all but the response of human natureto the universal laws of polarity, of attraction and repulsion,of mutual interchange of vibrations. A body that is attractedto another is negative to it, and after attraction, becomespositively charged, and when saturation point is reached it isrepelled. If marriage began and ended with this series of operations, there would be much misery in the world. Truemarriage is grounded in a deep sympathy and understandingwhich ahs no selfish ends to serve and no desire to satisfythat is not mutual. Friendship is the Divine basis of all purehuman relationships, conjugality or cohabitation in thehuman-animal part of it, and amativeness is the merelyphysical aspect. All Nature springs forth in its due seasonand bears its leaf and flower and fruit, and having fruited, itbegins to die down to its roots. In marriage relations if thatroot be a spiritual and intellectual friendship finding continualexpression in sympathy and understanding, then withoutdoubt it will outlive the varied assaults of any misfortunesthat may happen. But without this grappling hook of triedfriendship the connubial ship is almost sure to drift, and bysad fate may be broken on the rocks. The tree of human lifeis rooted in the soil of its mother earth, but its branches reachup towards heaven, whence also it receives its threefoldbenison of sunshine, air and rain, without which it cannotprosper.

But I think it's philosphy such as the Moslems regardless of what country they are in that sick to their marital beliefs and others who are weaker minded of Islam do not. Or Like Christians who devotedly follow their beliefs and others who claim the Bible faiths but use it more as an insurance policy. Or Like in reading the Old Testament, some Hebrews zealously followed the Code laid down by the astrologer Moses and many drifted away who were weaker minded, as opposed to being Higher minded.:innocent: