astrologer's prayer

[Maries]

Does anyone know the "Astrologer's prayer"? I only remember that it begins with Libra and ends with Cancer saying, "Dear, dear, dear God..." and leo sayinfg, "Yes." I remember Aries-- "Dear God, please give me patience-- NOW. And Libra-- Dear God, help me to be more decisive-- if you think it is best. But I can't remember the rest. Does anyone know this?

[Radu]

Here ya go :D

Prayers and Zodiacal Signs
Astrology Humour

ARIES: "Dear God! Give me PATIENCE and I want it NOW!"

TAURUS: "Dear God, please help me accept CHANGE in my life, but NOT YET."

GEMINI: "Yo God...(or is it Goddess?)...Who are you?...What are you?.....Where are You?.....How many of you ARE there? I can't figure you out!"

CANCER: "Dear Daddy, I know I shouldn't depend on you so much, but you're the only One I can count on while my security blanket is at the cleaners."

LEO: "Hi, Pop! I'll bet you're really proud to have me as your kid!"

VIRGO: "Dear God, please make the world a better place, and don't ***** it up like you did the last time."

LIBRA: "Dear God, I know I should make decisions for myself. But, on the other hand, what do YOU think?"

SCORPIO: "Dear God, help me forgive my enemies, even if the bastards don't deserve it."

SAGITTARIUS: "OH ALMIGHTY, ALL KNOWING, ALL-LOVING, ALL-POWERFUL, OMNIPRESENT, EVERLASTING GOD, IF I'VE ASKED YOU ONCE, I'VE ASKED YOU A THOUSAND TIMES --- HELP ME STOP EXAGGERATING!!!!!!!!!!"

CAPRICORN: "Dear Father, I was going to pray, but I guess I ought to figure things out for myself. Thanks anyway."

AQUARIUS: "Hi God! Some say you're a man. Some say you're a woman. I say we're ALL God. So, why pray? Let's have a party!"

PISCES: "Heavenly Father, as I prepare to consume this last fifth of Scotch to drown out my pain and sorrow, may my inebriation be for Thy greater Honor and Glory."

http://www.astrologyweekly.com/humour/prayers.php

[Lapis]

With proof like that how can anyone NOT believe in Astrology???
http://img234.imageshack.us/img234/722/laughinghard8cm.gif

I hadn't hear this one before, thanks for the laughs. Embarrassingly accurate!

[Eklipse]

:D So nice! The capricorn one is perfectly fitting :P

[baker]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Maries]

This isn't the one I originally saw years ago, but it is just as good! Bless you and Thank you thank you thank you!

the one I saw years ago began with Virgo and ended with Cancer saying, "Dear dear dear God" and Leo saying, "Yes." Do you or anyone else know THIS one?

Maries

[Lewsher]

hehe yeah they kinda fit to most people I know, altough I can relate better to the gemini one then to the taurus, they also remind me of yhese zodia lightbulb jokes floating around

[Angel of Something]

Very funny...

I've found "by the signs" stuff that is funny. Ehh, perhaps a bit off-topic.
(I don't know the astrology prayer that you mentioned, though...)

There's this (http://www.astrology.com/fun/cantsleep.html)
and this. (http://www.astrology.com/fun/astrogobble.html)

[Maries]

It's only taken --how many months to reply with the other Astrology Prayer? SORRY!!

PRAYERS AROUND THE ZODIAC


VIRGO Dear God, please make us perfect and don't mess it up like
You did the last time.

LIBRA Dear God, please help me to be decisive, but on the other
hand, what do you think is best?

SCORPIO Our Father, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors,
even though they don't deserve it!

SAGITTARIUS Dear Lord, if I've told you once, I've told you a million
times, help me stop exaggerating.

CAPRICORN Dear God! I'd like to ask you to help me, but I learned a
long time ago not to rely on anyone else!

AQUARIUS Dear God, I know I like change, but this chaos is ridiculous!!

PISCES Dear Lord, as long as I'm going to drink this fifth of Scotch
tonight, please use the stimulation for Thy glory.

ARIES Dear God, please give me patience... and could you do it
right now?

TAURUS Dear God, help me accept change, but not too quick.

GEMINI Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God?

CANCER Dear God!!!

LEO Yes?

Maries