Will I Feel Better Soon?

[misskitty]

Hello everyone. This question is too important to me, so I wanted to post it to make sure I get the delineation right. I don't normally do medical horaries, so please tell me if I do something wrong...

My question is "will I feel better soon?"

I am asking because I am going through a severe depression. I feel like I'm starting to take some positive steps in the right direction and am seeking treatment, but anyone who has experience with this particular illness (as I have off and on most of my life) will tell you that it is very difficult to pull yourself out of without help. Anyway, I am starting to be proactive, and I would like to know when I will start to feel better. What triggered this episode is a bad breakup, and I haven't heard from the person since. And also stress over my thesis, a best friend who has turned into a bridezilla, blah blah blah.

I see the ASC is early, but it is conjunct my natal rising of 1*. Lilly said it is valid in that case.

In the chart, I see I am Mercury in the cadent 6th house. I feel powerless. However, I am about to trine Saturn, in my 2nd house of self-worth and ruler of my 5th house (fun and play!). Perhaps this is a good sign?

The ruler of my 12th, the Sun, is peregrine and cadent, again showing my state of mind right now. Not good at all. BUT it is about to conjunct Neptune. Does this perhaps show a return of hope?

The Moon is peregrine. That worries me. But it IS angular and has accidental dignity. It was conjunct Algol (the most malefic fixed star that symbolizes losing one's head over something) but that is separating. Whew.

The Moon is about to sextile Jupiter, ruler of my 7th. Does that mean I will hear from my ex? At least the aspect is a semi-good one (sxtile) so hopefully whatever he has to say won't upset me too much.

Have I missed anything? Would really appreciate some help. Thanks for reading.

http://i61.photobucket.com/albums/h48/janders36/feelbettersoon.png

[dr. farr]

(Following is not in accordance with standard horary delineation and uses whole sign house format)

The Lot of Happiness falls @ 20Cancer40, posited in the (whole sign) house of friends, friendship and the Good Spirit, also being a succedent house = auspicious for Happiness developing
- both you (significator = Mercury) and your co-significator (Moon) flow toward the Part of Happiness: so its going to happen.
-ascending degree (1 Virgo) is an elevated degree, giving an auspicious tone to the Cosmic answer to your question
-blocking/hampering indication: Moon is in a pitted degree: clear indication (to me), taking this into account along with the Part of Happiness being in Cancer (disposited by the Moon) Lunar affinitive qualities (emotions, etc) must be strengthened; feeling that you have no choices (as shown by Moon being in a pitted degree), which is a delusion (as shown by you-as ascending degree-being elevated) must be overcome; Part of Happiness posited in the 11th house shows that you must cultivate or be with friends (real friends, honest friends) and must not shun or shy away from friendship.
-estimated time-frame (for feeling better): Mercury to Part of Happiness, by sign (each sign taken as 1 week) = 5 weeks, to-each sign taken as 1 month-5 months, from the date of the question.

Addendum: Part of Happiness = 110 degrees 40 minutes = 1+1+0+4+0 = 6; the 6th Major Arcana Tarot symbol = The Lovers; since the symbolic essence point of the Part of Happiness is @ 20Cancer40, this places it in the + half of the sign of Cancer;so the interpretation would be:
......THE LOVERS (upright)
...I think the indications for this symbol are quite relevant to the question...

Best wishes-you will be feeling better!

[misskitty]

Thank you dr. farr! I love that the Part of Happiness is in the house of friendship. Admittedly, depression usually makes me want to isolate myself, and I'm trying hard to find a good balance between time alone and getting out of the house with friends. I also like that it is represented by the Lovers card because this means new beginnings. It is taking me some time to find my footing again, but I know you are right that I DO have power waiting for me to discover it. I feel like a crab hiding in its shell right now, but I will want to come out, eventually. Thanks so much!

[misskitty]

I just wanted to update this thread. I have started to feel better, and I can pinpoint the time it started happening to being around March 11th. I still don't feel completely like myself, but I feel like I'm coming out of the depression finally and will be able to move forward with my thesis, work, etc. I am still dealing with the emotional exhaustion and burnout, but at least I feel like I want to fight them again. My friendship and family have been crucial to me during this time.

As for events that happened, the ex did contact me again on FEb 21st and he apologized for his behavior. I accepted his apology and told him that I didn't think we should have further contact. I believe that was the closure I needed, I couldn't face the possiblity of getting hurt by him again.

Thank you for helping me with this one dr. farr!

[dr. farr]

I am glad to hear of your improvement, and that it began at the earlier (1 month from date of question) rather than the later (5 months) time estimation!
You will be even better than you were before, from this experience, which is an opportunity for spiritual advancement.

[misskitty]

Yes, that is very true because I have been delving deeper and deeper into the study of meditation and the works of Pema Chodron. It has helped significantly and has been very transforming. I feel like it isn't quite over, so maybe the five month mark will be when I finally slay the dragons of burnout and emotional exhaustion and will finally feel whole. :)