Will I Stay Married to Him

[Wildflower]

I have been married almost 20 years with much recent turmoil and emotional detachment. We are living in separate emotional worlds. I asked will I stay married to him?

http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a186/ThisMuchIsCertain/wiillistaymarried.gif

I am Mars (interesting as I am the most restless and passionate of the two). He is Venus. Mars is not aspecting Venus or the Moon.

[Summery Joy]

This is puzzling me. I see no applying aspects or collection or translation of light for a yes answer. This should mean,"No, you won't stay married to him.". However, I don't see indications of a divorce in the chart. I don't know if the lack of a yes should be enough of a no or the divorce must be shown somehow to make a definite answer.

I hope that lunar opposition to Neptune is signifying illusions regarding that matter.

But the chart shows Venus (your husband) separating from Mars (you). I think describe the emtional gap between you two.

Look, Wildflower. If you are already having worries about divorce, then you have probably hit rockbottom. What else is there to lose if you try to revive the passion somehow? Not by nagging or 'communicating' though. Men hate that! Maybe just lighthearted, romantic gestures could do the trick. Be ware, your significator in the begining degrees of Virgo shows you already in primary stages of depression. Don't let yourself slip into it. It's not good for your health nor your marriage.

Good luck.

[Francesca]

WARNING: I AM A BEGINNER and you shouldn't take what I say too seriously.

It looks to me that you are more likely to leave him, and that he is worried about this at a deep level. There may be a collection of light here from Jupiter but the aspects are harsh, meaning mediation by a third party may help, but would be extremely difficult.

Your discomfort is shown by Mars being unhappy in Virgo and the moon in Leo.
His venus is at home in Cancer but not by house. The sun is comfortable in Leo but is , as you say unaspected by your significators.

I think you may be headed for a separation, but as I warned, wait for word from the experts. Good luck.

[Wildflower]

Thanks francesca and sorehearted.

I am saddened by it and perhaps even a bit depressed. I feel trapped and don't even feel as though I have the energy to make little romantic gestures. I don't even know if I want romance with him anymore. In my fantasy we part as good friends and I find him a good wife. c'est la vie.

I do not ever see him wanting a divorce, ever. He would be shocked and heartbroken if I even suggested it. Much of what you both point out is accurate. And there are no aspects because I simply do not feel any connection at all.... I am exhausted.

[EvilPixyScorp]

Ok, well the way I see it...

You are Mars & the husband is Venus.
Both of these planets are in the other one's Triplicity,
this is a big indicator of affection & love.
However, both planets are in the Sign of the other planet's Fall.

The love is there, even if you are emotionally distant now,
but being together you both aren't able to "Express, function"
strongly...people growing apart, no one's fault type thing.

The Moon's sep. aspect from Jup/12th.. 12th being "confined
places", unfortunate house, the sadness leading to the question.
(Jup. represent "story telling, the written word, legal issues, religion, etc.)
Does this ring a bell??

Next aspect by Moon is a conjunction to malefic Saturn, natural sig. of
solitude, restrictions..then is moves to oppose Neptune Rx, another malefic.

Venus(him) applys to trine that Jup...whatever it is..It will agree with him, whereas the Moon(your co-ruler) squared(was bothered by) it previously.

I'm very sorry, but the chart seems to point to a
period of being separated from each other, hopefully just temporary.

All the best dear~
Pixy

[Barry-ann]

Hi Wildflower,
Sorry I'm being blunt here, but: you seem to want a divorce...
The thing about divorce is only one of the partners has to initiate.
Usually people do not divorce on mutual consent... Remember it is a huge decision with lots of pain for all parties involved, however tempting life without him might seem to you now!

I find it a strange chart. You are Mars, having just moved into Virgo, and you are almost hostile to your husband (Venus in fall in Virgo).
But you still love him, (apparently hidden) since Venus is in Marses triplicity, and he loves you, you are in his truplicity!
The thing is he seems to be moving fast away from you! You are much slower, you stay behind.

What intrigues me is Venus is in applying trine to Jupiter. I find that meaningful, since Venus is well received by Jupiter (exaltation and term) Jup is in his 6th (colleague??) and your twelfth, hidden from you.
Could there be someone else for him? Or something about daily work/personnel? Jupiter is ruler of your 4th, might be your home, your parents?
The no aspects part of this makes me think there will be a sort of separation, initiated by him. For an actual divorce, I would expect your rulers in applying opposition or square.
Mars is moving into his fourth= end of the matter for him. Mars is behind Venus in all further applying aspects, and will sextile Jupiter sometime after Venus has trined it.

More about Jupiter: you actually like Jupiter very much! And he/she does not feel at home where you are now, Jupiter in Detriment in Virgo.
Sorehearted, what about that Uranus for sudden breaks in 4?
Moon for events will conjunct malefic Saturn first, then oppose Neptune and trine Pluto.
I'm sure there is a lot I did not mention... and I'm sorry it does not look very comfortable for you! But there is almost nothing that can not be turned around anymore! This is the situation now. Things can change.
Best of luck, Wildflower!
B-A

[Summery Joy]

In my fantasy we part as good friends

Well, the last lunar aspect in Leo is a trine with Pluto Rx. Pluto is a malefic that often signifies fights/arguments, but a trine is a smooth aspect. Maybe this aspect signifies your fantasy and that you'll eventually get to that point.

[Wildflower]

Thanks everyone for your kind responses. Nothing is going to happen anytime soon because we have not had any serious discussion about it or us. I'm not sure what the deal is with that happy Jupiter. I doubt seriously that he has anyone as it defies his values, behavior, activities and even schedule. He does not like to rock the boat in any matter or way.But I won't say it's impossible just improbable....

Evil pixy you wrote:

You are Mars & the husband is Venus.
Both of these planets are in the other one's Triplicity,
this is a big indicator of affection & love.
However, both planets are in the Sign of the other planet's Fall.

The love is there, even if you are emotionally distant now,
but being together you both aren't able to "Express, function"
strongly...people growing apart, no one's fault type thing.

That resonates with me. I just can't imagine being in this relationship for the rest of my life.

[Barry-ann]

Hi Wildflower, You don't have to stay married at all!!!
You are on the steer of your own life... take responsibilty for what you want!

I was just warning you to not believe divorce is paradise, that you're not going to be happy ever after and live the fantasies you may have about being 'free' now. This is my own experience speaking...
That's just as unrealistic as believing marriage in itself brings happiness.
You take yourself wherever you are.

Best of luck with everything!
B-A

[Danae]

Hi Wildflower!

I was very interested in watching the responses to your question, as one of my last question's chart is similar with your one. At least the significators ... Only I was the Venus. Even my question wasn't about my husband i was surprised about some similarity. Like I am facing as well a divorce, but I am the one who want it very badly and even I put the paper in the court. Now I must have that serious talk with my husband as well which I delaying too much. He knows I want the divorce, but he don't know anything about the court day!

So I want to tell that I understand you very well, I took a very long time to take this decision even our relationship was almost dead for some time. Reading your post and the replays helped me to understand better my chart as well.

I wish you all the best in what you want to do in your life from now on. You Knows better what is best for you and have courage to fallow it.