Indicators of Avoidant personality/Shyness....

[EvilPixyScorp]

Need some unbiased opinions. :)
This personality problem started around about 8.
I read about pyschology, even then, and recognize the family factors that would predispose me to be uncomfortable sharing close feelings(Except with people on the internet, lol...no problem there!!).

See anything astrologically, or have aspects yourselves?


http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c80/EvilPixyDust/MyChartNew.gif



It's sooo bad, I'm super sensitive to the energies of a room, to the point of stomach sickness...I slowly turned into a hermit basically to avoid the panic feelings.
I envy people who don't get the constant, "this person thinks I'm not dressed right, is judging my moves" ect. brain dialogue.
I don't even think my long time friends like me, assume they secretly feel I am a burden to them, & don't call then as often as I want...Which makes me come off as "ice queen, unreadable, aloof, snobby", been called this by dates/strangers.


BUT heres the part that confuses me...
Much the opposite of my shyness side..The only job I honestly enjoyed doing, was stripping!(Ruler of 8H in 10H Scorpio?)
Laugh if ya want, but I took it serious, was never scared off by the backstabbing coworkers tactics.

[wilsontc]

Pixy,

Since you have most of your planets at the top right of your chart, you focus most on using your understanding of the outer world to personally do things in the outer world...such as stripping! ;)

You have a bundle chart - according to Tracy Marks The Art of Astrological Chart Interpretation:
Bundle pattern - "All planets are contained within a trine - 120 degrees, or...a maximum of 130 degrees...self-contained, focused personality who resourcefully concentrates...[their] energy upon a limited area of life, indicated by the signs and houses occupied by planets...This individual...has the capacity to develop...[their] resources to the utmost...[the first planet to have crossed the ascendant, moving clockwise] often indicates energy which may be used to achieve in the area of life indicated by the far midpoint of the bundle."

The first planet to have crossed your Ascendant is Neptune (spirituality, also illusion), so perhaps stripping interested you as a way to create an illusion of calmness and confidence. By the way the "far midpoint of the bundle" is focused on the Descendant (others), so this can account for your focus on others...and stripping certainly counts as a focus on others! ;)

In addition, there are few strongly challenging aspects to other planets in your chart. This frequently indicates a chart of a person who "has it easy" in the sense that life seems to be pretty easy. Which means that the challenges of life (challenging transits - movements of planets in the sky) hit the person much harder than people who have a lot of challenging aspects in their birth chart.

Interpreting with my clothes on, ;)

Tim

[Summery Joy]

EvilPixyScorp,

In addition to Tim's interpretation, I can also note that you have most of your planets in water and earth signs, signs commonly known as feminine signs. These signs to be more shy than masculine signs.

A shy stripper? I'm not very surprised. You have a stellium in Scoprio. Scoprio is the sign of extremes. Also, and this is a personal opinion, I have always thought that Scoprio is the sign of ulter-egos. I cannot imgaine a Scoprio without an ulter-ego even if it were only an imgainary one. So.. you're like Superman.. shy reporter by day and super sexy by night ;)

Also, modern astrologers associate sexuality as means of fundamental release of energy with the sign of Scoprio. That doesn't mean that a Scoprio cannot be shy.

[Rattyo]

I've had the same kind of avoidance and shyness problems since a young boy. I have the same sun sign as yourself.

http://www.publicupload.com/files/achart_2vrfileQ5WUef-u1132590510.54569.13894.gif (http://www.publicupload.com)

[Arian Maverick]

Wow, your Ascendant is within a degree or two of my own! And you have your moon in Aries...based on these two factors, I am having difficult understanding astrologically why you may be shy :?

EDIT: I was just browsing through some of the old threads on the board and located this: shyness (http://astrologyweekly.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=601)

Arian Maverick

[AquariusMoon]

Pixy, I was taught that having planets in H12 could make one socially shy, and you have a H12 stellium, Neptune being one of the planets. It's the house of secrets, and planets in H12 are sort of hidden. Neptune sittin gin H12 would sensitize you to other people's vibes.

I too have a H12 planet and it's connected to my strongly placed Neptune, and I was socially shy when young and was also very sensitive to other people's vibes, but have long since outgrown that.

[blumen]

BUT heres the part that confuses me...
Much the opposite of my shyness side.....

Oh, that looks absolutely normal to me. I know a male stripper who has a shyness problem as well. Now it is very late at night, but I'll look at the chart to try and spot the aspect which may signal shyness and post my reply in one or two days,

Blumen

[Kite]

This personality problem started around about 8.

Sun Progressed to Saturn and Pluto solar arc'd to Sun when you were 8. Was there a death then? Maybe a child or friend? Perhaps you felt your mortality for the first time then. With Saturn ruling your first house you also may have had some experience with your body - maybe first hints of sexualization (Sun rules the 8th house). Also, both the Sun and Pluto were in 10 but had progressed to 11. Could a parent have gone through some deep transformation that you picked up on - (Venus rules 10 and is in 12 conjunct Uranus). Uranus, ruler of 2 had progressed by SA to Venus when you were about 4 1/2. Perhaps you received a very early sense of your sexuality and that you held this as a resource you could exploit (Jup in 1 in Capricorn) as needed for your survival and sustanence (2nd house). With Venus conjunct Uranus in Sag, it would give you a sense of sexual inhibition but contained within the 12th house as something you could act with in a strip club which could be seen as 12th house type of place where the visitors may be hiding their brand of morality (Sag on the cusp) from others, especially with Neptune conjunct the Ascendant.

Emotions are the area of the moon and your moon also rules your 7th house of intimate encounters. A Pisces moon is sensitive to begin with and then you have a square to Mercury which is communications or challenges sharing your feelings and in 11th house..also problems sharing feelings with friends. Moon also squares Uranus (applying and would have also been SA conjunct at 8 years old) which could mean a problem relying on others who may be more concerned with their own adventures than with you. What happened when you were 8? What kind of emotional avoidance did you experience with who?

You also have Chiron in the 5th house in Gemini which is your house of self-expression and that too is squared by the moon offering up a t-square involving the Moon, squaring Chiron and Uranus. Maybe a brother or sister was involved in hurting your sense of self? With your North Node there conjunct the malific star Algol, perhaps you feel this need to pierce the dark side of your self-expression, - perhaps the evil-pixie-scorpio side? Here is the Sabian on your Chiron placement which begs the question - were you forced to surrender against your will or your will itself when you were very young?

68__(8°)
AROUND A CLOSED-DOWN FACTORY STRIKERS MILL DEFIANTLY A stirring of the collective,unconscious factors of being toward the repolarization of the conscious ego. Idle protest.
___*When positive, the degree is undeviating self-assertiveness and a refusal to accept any lesser in lieu of a greater, and when negative, a dissatisfaction which surrenders rather than regrasps the self's potential.


Here are a couple of more Sabians for you based on the t-square. The midpoints of the opposition ar 10 Pisces and 10 Virgo. Perhaps these readings will give you more clues.

340__(10°)
THE AVIATOR SAILS ACROSS THE SKY, MASTER OF HIGH REALMS Transcendence of normal problems. Gaining of celestial responsibilities. Consummation of the highest ideals. Coronation.
___*When positive, the degree is special competence in whole judgement and long-range planning, and when negative, insensate otherworldliness or irresponsible isolationism.

160__(10°)
A MAN WITH TWO HEADS IS SEEN LOOKING OUT TO THE BEYOND Consciousness functioning in inner and outer realms. Competence in understanding. Over-sensitiveness to life-currents.
___*When positive, the degree is a superb capacity for seeing both sides in every given issue and so bringing all the various phases of human enterprise to some unity of common purpose, and when negative, hopeless fragmentation of self within itself.

Again, the Uranus solar arc progression would have made the Chrion opposition exact and the moon would have been past it by 2 degrees around 5 years old..ring any bells? Anything happen at 3 years old when your moon was square Chiron by SA?

Kite

[EvilPixyScorp]

Right on Kite!! Wow! didnt expect that much looking into :)

My parents got divorced in 1989, so that's the 5 y/o time.
Yes, I think I could sense the issues back then, but I have almost NO memories(about anything good or bad) before maybe 4th grade.

Well after 1989, a few years later (after living with her)...
Mom disappeared for reasons I didn't believe back then.
This was probably 8-9.
Dad said she was stealing drugs from work, needed to go to a half way house...And I was moved to a new town, with my new stepmom..Who hated me & sister. Then he divorced her shortly, lived just with him, until some tramp boozehound moved in with us.
She would accuse me of stealing her books(what?? lol)...Etc.
Not like he did anything about it.

The sibling wound is probably because, while all thats going on...Sister moved away for college, didn't see all the chaos...And had quite the sharp, cruel tongue herself...like she resented having to take care of me when (I'm assuming)..Mom was all stoned.
I don't recall ever been sexually molested, or sex being brought up at all..but for some reason it fascinated me...I prayed I'd grow up to look like those 80's rock video vixens..Didn't even loose virginity till 20 though..lol..Maybe I should do some hypnotic regression?

[Kite]

EPS - the sex symbol identification could be a way of trying to make yourself wanted by an obviously unique male image you have of what a man wants based on your experience with Dad.

It could be productive to explore that idea of what men want and how you might be playing into it instead of thinking about what you really want (which might also be conditioned by your mother image). All of this is changeable however, once you become conscious of these "programs".


Kite

[Lunar Pisces]

I disagree with sorehearted's generalization of feminine signs as "shy" - actually, honestly, I find that a rather sexist interpretation of both femininity and these signs. :?

Shyness isn't a natural feminine quality (even if, socially, it's encouraged) - I mean, would you call lionesses and momma bears shy? Shyness in humans a very complicated psychological issue that applied to both genders and thus is not gender specific (and thus astrologically, it's not sign specific either).

Shyness is also a very broad problem, so what one person means by shyness could be completely different from what someone else mean. So if you're looking at a chart for indicator fo shyness, it's best to base your search on the detail the native provides about their speciifc circumstances and look broadly at the chart, and not limit your search to what you assume.

However, while I resist using the word "shy", water and earth sign are introverted, indirect, and passive. However, these are secondary qualities of these signs more primary essence: these are intuitive signs, which makes them distinct from fire (action and tangible results) and air (thought and discernable facts). Earth is cerebral-intutive and water is emotional-intuitive. Both are in realm very different from the realm of fire and air. Definitions are not as precise, and conclusions, beliefs, and views are intuitive rather than based in trial and error or in hard logic. Both earht and water, they are good at sensing, feeling, intuiting, and knowing through non-rational paths, but what they lack is the ability to be apart from what they sense. Both are somewhat dependant in this sense. Both are very interior in essence and thus need exterior containment in someway, less earth crumbles into granules and water spreads too thin. Contaimnet can be anything that helps give earth and water definition, boudaries or security: it can be through assistence, affirmation, discipline even some form of protection. This need for conntainment gives earth and water their own insecurities (that is not to say that fire and air don't have insecurities of their own). Without some form of containment, life's experiences becomes confusing, leaving earth and water vulnerable and perhaps feeling threatened. Granted this isn't as negative as it sounds. Most people have a balance of earth/water with fire/air - the fire/air provides that need containment.

Now, I'll say something about about EvilScorp and Rattyo's chart. Problems of shyness in charts of water Suns make me look to what would make that Sun feel insecure or threaten. They have different moons - Pisces and Aries - so my second thought would be their problems are very distinct. Obviously, seeing Rattyo claims his problems was mainly in childhood, whereas for EvilScorp this is an ongoing issue, it is.

It would seem that for Rattyo, he easily outgrew his insecurities, being an Aries moon. Most Aries moons get smart from experience - they did to figure out through trial and error that the world isn't that scary after all. It would appear that his Pluto opposition with his moon may be the root of many of his insecurities (this is an easily threatening aspect), but seeing it forms the base of a t-square with Mars (very agreeable apex for a Aries moon), it's likely he has found constructive ways to cope with the inner tensions this opposition as he grow older.

For EvilScorp, yes there's a lot of water, but one needs to look at why that water is insecure, and not simply think "water = insecurity." EvilScorp claims she feels hypersensitive to the energies around her. Water is highly conductive, and energy moves readily through it. This is especially true of someone with a water moon, and particularly true of Pisces moons (my sympathies - I have the same problem), Pisces moon, which is arguably the most psychic moon, is also inarguably the most vulnerable and "wide open" moon. A water Sun with a Pisces moon is in an uniquely vulnerable position - both luminaries need exterior contaiment (protection) from all the energies that both absorb. Such a person runs the risk of being overwhelmed by the energies in the environment and from other people, creating confusing and inability to seperate one's self form others.

Now seeingEvilScorp has an Cap ascendant and 1H Jupiter and Mars, what she says about stripping makes sense. Cap, like other earth signs, when feeling threatened or overwhelmed by outside energies, it likes to retreat, get away, create a distance. Stripping could be a form of distance, an assurance that one can get something (income) and stay in control without being overwhelmed or dominated (the stage provides a kind of safe buffer). Both her 1H Jupiter (risk-taking) and Mars (sexuality, need to express power) likely add to both her willingness and enjoyment of this type of job. But like any hypersensitive water person, it was her close interactions with those backstage that overwhlemed her and drove her away (again, Cap ASC creating distance to resolve the problem).

Her claim of "becoming a hermit" seems indicated by his Neptune conjunct ASC. Neptune can indicate escapism, which may have also contributed to her enjoyment of stripping - a kind of "escape" through overts sexual expression - granted, while Pluto and Scorpio are most commonly associated iwth sex, Neptune and Pisces should be noted for their highly sexual side and inclination to use sex as a form of escape. That aside, if feeling unprotected, Neptune /Pisces withdraws deeper into its own undercurrents when faced with a hostile outside world. Another problem with this Neptunian withdrawal is the longer it last, the more distorted the native's view of the outside world becomes - think of trying to look at the world through several feet of water.

Such distortion can lead to increasingly irrational reactions to the outside world, like panic attacks and overly suspicious thoughts of others. For EvilScorp, she seems to have a particular challenge here, since phobias and paranoia are linked to both Neptune and Pluto. Not only does she have Neptune rising and Pisces moon, she also has Scorip moon conjunct Pluto. The defensiveness she describes (i.e., being an ice queen) is likely rooted both in her earth ASC (again, distance) and the influence of Pluto (secretiveness, suspicion), with Neptune (withdrawal) for good measure. I say thi is a particualr challenge for her because this involves both luminaries and ASC.

This is not to say EvilScorp should despair. The challenge for her is to recognize what in her life that she lacks. I hate to psychoanalyze her blank point and via an armchair, but for someone with a 1H Jupiter and Mars to become so introverted and withdrawn seems to indicate acculminated psychological injury, probably extending from since early childhood, which is very possible with a water-water-earth person (she undoubtedly has be a very profound memory, which may be a curse as much as a blessing for her). She needs to understand that every person has different needs, and for her, as some so vulnerable and sensitive, her needs are for healing, nuturing, affirmation, compassion and protection. She needs realize that she does need ot let other into her inner life, and most importantly, that she needs to seek out others who can provide her what she needs. Just as importantly, she needs to avoid people who would continue to exploit, hurt or drag her down. She is highly influenced by her environment and those she around - that also means retreating to a sterile, isolated environment is not the best place for her. The good news is that she certainly has to capacity to choose to change her enivonment.

And a more personal note to EvilScorp (seeing I've persisted in speaking of her in 3rd person up til now): I know as a Pisces moon myself that healing can take some time. "It takes as long as it takes," as one of my most dearest friends and former spiritual director liked to say. See this as a journey for you. You're obviously not in a place you want to be, and you have to desire to change your life - otherwise, being a Scorpio, you wouldn't have said anything. :wink: Surely your past seems like an overwhelming critic that threatens to beat down all your hopes. The challenge for any watery person is to remember that the past is in the past, and today is something different. Today you can heal, learn, grow, and move on. As long as you continue to put effort into making today something different than the past, even if by small steps and little things, life will get better.

For someone with a 10H Sun and 1H Jupiter and Mars, you certainly have a lot potential you've yet to exploit. As you heal, you will also discover more about yourself and grow in your personal strength and self-knowledge. I suspect you have an ikling that there are good things about you that have yet come to the surface. Let that be an impetus for you to continue making positive changes in your life, regardless of how gloomy the past may be or how daunting the future seems.

[wilsontc]

Lunar,

You said:
...water and earth sign are...intuitive signs, which makes them distinct from fire (...tangible results)...Earth is cerebral-intutive and water is emotional-intuitive...Definitions are not as precise, and conclusions, beliefs, and views are intuitive rather than based in trial and error or in hard logic. Both earht and water, they are good at sensing, feeling, intuiting, and knowing through non-rational paths...Both...need exterior containment in someway, less earth crumbles into granules and water spreads too thin...gives earth and water their own insecurities...Without some form of containment, life's experiences becomes confusing, leaving earth and water vulnerable and perhaps feeling threatened...she also has Scorip moon conjunct Pluto...

Great ideas! I agree with most of what you put down, with the exception that Pixy has Moon TRINE Pluto (not conjunct). However, I have some differences of opinion with what I quoted above from your post.

In my opinion, I don't think of fire as needing "tangible" results. For fire, the only result that needs to happen from one of its ideas is that fire came up with the idea. If the idea doesn't work out...that's YOUR problem! ;) Fire is too busy coming up with the next "big idea"!

Also, earth is NOT an intuitive sign. In fact, it is anything BUT intuitive. Rather than "trusting a hunch" earth will track down what happened and why and go over and over and OVER it again to understand it. Hunches or intuition aren't enough...there MUST be some form of "physical" proof! And so, instead of being "cerebral" (i.e., thinking/social, associated with air energy), instead earth is a MATERIAL process. Earth signs all come from the "show me" state..."Show me just exactly how this works so I understand it" is a common earth phrase. While this is not "rational", it is also not "intuitive." For earth "thinking" about it or "feeling" is NOT enough: seeing is believing! ;)

And, while certainly water needs containment (e.g., in a glass, in the ocean bed, etc.), I don't think earth needs any sort of external containment: a mountain (i.e., earth) isn't going to get up and go anywhere by itself...it will stay where it has ALWAYS stayed. In fact, it seems that all the three OTHER signs DO need containment of some kind: fire needs containment or it runs wild and burns up everything, air needs containment or it spreads out into nothing, and water needs containment or it runs all over the place. But earth contains itself. It stays where it is and doesn't need any outside force to get it to stay where it is put. Earth's challenge, then, isn't about containment, it is about becoming TOO contained, too set in its ways, too still, so that when change happens fire, air, and water easily react and adjust to it, while earth is still deciding whether or not a change has actually occurred! ;)

Your post was wonderful, but as someone fairly well acquainted with earth in a chart (I have 6 planets in earth!), I was struck by what you said about earth and wanted to clarify my concerns. As you notice, I am not trusting my feelings, intuition, or my mind...it is my own direct experience of how earth works which prompted me to write!

Earthily contained,

Tim

[EvilPixyScorp]

That alot to take in, everything you all said...I'm absorbing it now, and think I was lead here by some guides...Such a generous bunch with all your knowledge/time. :)


North Node on Algol, in 5th....
Standing up for myself, and "losing my head" is very scary for me as you can imagine. Both parents had nasty screaming fit habits.
My temper gets directed to punching walls, etc. ....but I should gear it toward artistic endeavors..Maybe singing/rock star stuff, or writing darker/scary screenplays.


I can see the Cap working, especially Mars.
When TR. Uranus conj. Moon...I started escorting as well *geez thats personal, ugh!*, because it was, in my rationalization...A way to test repressed sexual side, without any chance of personal rejection?
It's all about boundaries mentally... people at the clubs, men and women, let those "work mentalities" spread into personal lives..Mine spread visa versa.

Easier to believe your happiness/worth increases with your bank account(SN Scorp), than simply pursue activities solely for "fun"(5th house NN).

[Kite]

When TR. Uranus conj. Moon...I started escorting as well *geez thats personal, ugh!*

Well it's not surprising with Libra on the MC and ruler Venus in 12 conjunct Uranus as well as Uranus ruling the 2nd house.

It sounds like you're ok with it and not like you need saving or anything. But it does sound like you're missing intimacy in your life which is bothering you.

It also sounds like you're beginning the process of finding that by being intimate with yourself which means your being as honest with yourself as you can. Stay the course and you will begin to open up more and more. You have to trust you before you can trust anyone else.

[dissolve]

Hey, I have some similar difficulties to you in that i'm very inhibited socially and that I have some difficulties with intimacy. Like you it has been commented that I'm very hard to read and I'm not very demonstrative of how i feel with others.

I thought I'd offer my chart as a comparison. The things I noticed were both of our charts are 'bundled' (correct me if I'm wrong), both have 12th house venus and we both have strong water influences: Pisces and Scorpio.

I don't have much knowledge of astrology so this is very basic but maybe others can see more similarities.

My chart is already posted under 'top heavy chart'. I'm not sure how to repost it as I'm on a different computer.

[LnLL]

Hmm, I also have some shyness issues, and also have a 12th house Venus. I wonder if a Venus in the 12th means it's hard to access that social part. I also have Neptune on the MC though which probably adds to it.


For EvilPixyScorp, I would read as much as you can about Pluto. Pluto conjunct Sun is a big deal (anything conj. Sun is, but Pluto's a heavy-hitter) and it's also the start to your bundle, and the highest planet. I wonder if part of the problem for you is opening yourself up. Scorpio energy likes to keep itself from being vulnerable as it knows that vulnerability can be dangerous. Scorpio is where our most primal survival needs/instincts meet the more "human" part, or the higher mind. I think a big part of this is overcoming fear. Someone said you can't trust others unless you trust yourself and that's definitely true. But Pluto in Scorpio will survive, you can count on that. Maybe you're also a little afraid of your own power? Maybe you saw power mis-used and you don't want to mis-use it? Also, Saturn in Scorpio likes to keep emotions under control, or at least not show them to anyone (I have Saturn in Scorpio). I think this can make for being "aloof" but it's more because the emotions are strong and overwhelming to other people so it's sometimes easier to keep them inside. Anyway, I'm not a professional, just some thoughts. Also, a really good book on Pluto is called "The Book Of Pluto" by Steven Forrest, and another one that is highly recommended, but I haven't read, is "Pluto: The Evolutionary Journey Of The Soul" by Jeff Green. I think learning to access your very powerful Scorpio-ness might be of some help to you :). Also, Mars is exalted in Capricorn, and it's in your first house, so look to this placement for some help as well (perhaps in balancing out the Neptune on the ASC). Maybe getting in touch with the earth will help with Neptune as well and strengthen the Cap. placements....like feet in the grass, eating fresh veggies, going on hikes, just being in nature.

Anyway, I can sympathize at least. Being "shy" is very difficult, especially in American culture where being social/outgoing is idealized over many other qualities.

-Meg

[jagetoile]

deleted post.

[lilllybelle]

Quote "assume they secretly feel I am a burden to them, & don't call then as often as I want...Which makes me come off as "ice queen, unreadable, aloof, snobby", been called this by dates/strangers."

I've had the same feelings before. It's a sad feeling almost feeling like no one loves you. I've always attributed it to my saturn in the 12th. Maybe it is your 12th house quality that causes this feeling. One of my best friends, whom I've talked about a million times all over this forum, had a stellium in the 12th also. She stripped for a while. She had pluto in the 8th with a pisces rising. She had a very piscean nature with plutonic undertones. She is very shy and introverted. L.

[lilllybelle]

[QUOTE=]assume they secretly feel I am a burden to them, & don't call then as often as I want...Which makes me come off as "ice queen, unreadable, aloof, snobby", been called this by dates/strangers."

I've had the same feelings before. It's a sad feeling almost feeling like no one loves you. I've always attributed it to my saturn in the 12th. Maybe it is your 12th house quality that causes this feeling. One of my best friends, whom I've talked about a million times all over this forum, had a stellium in the 12th also. She stripped for a while. She had pluto in the 8th with a pisces rising. She had a very piscean nature with plutonic undertones. She is very shy and introverted.

[lilllybelle]

I didn't mean to make a second post. I was playing around with the quote button. L

[lilllybelle]

A.M., If it's not a big deal, could you please erase the second post that I made? Thank you, L.

[Belgianmoonguy]

Virgo?
I have a Virgo Rising and Moon... It's not easy for me to melt in a few seconds for someone...
I can seem like an ice king...

But with me, it's not something for ever
I mean, once someone is in my life, I open up soon
I'm like an open book, but some pages must not be read :38:

H12 as an indicator of shyness?
Sun ruler house 12, opposed to Neptune, trine Pluto (in 3)...
When i was younger, i was more shy... But Moon rules early childhood... It's in Virgo... I was always writing

[Lissa]

I would believe that Virgo/Capricorn rising would create shyness,altough aspects to the Ascendant would soften the shyness(or make it even worse).Saturn in the first house would probably be held accountable for shyness problems as well-Saturn in the1st creates a lot of insecurity and feelings of being inferior to others.

Anyway-I'm a Capricorn rising with Saturn(3ºAquarius)in the1st,and shyness is definitly a problem for me(I get shy around5year old children!).

[2rainbows]

My 4 year old daughter sure has the shy factor going on. i sometimes think she turns it off and on when she wants, but also think it could be a heightened sensitivity to vibes around her. some vibes cause her guard to go up, others do not. she is also a bonafide thumb sucker. used for security reasons, when she's tired along with her blankie (added security). i do not have time right now to look into all her astro details.
So for others with the shy factor, were you thumb suckers and if so, how old were you when you quit?
2rainbows

[kimbermoon]

I so empathize with you : Moon in Pisces tends to often be quite introverted because of it's heightened sensitivity. I suffered much of the same type of hyper-reactions as you: butterflies in the stomache, sweaty palms and social anxiety.

other indications of SHYNESS:

Capricorn rising with Neptune rising in the 12th - the moon or neptune conjunct the AC is highly indicative of this

SUN/PLUTO SCORPIO 10TH HOUSE - you may shine quite well on stage while at the same time suffer deeply on the Soul level. Others are drawn to your sexuality and projection of confidence and control, but in certain situations others may see you as being 'intimidating' and fear that you may have underlying hidden motivations. The transformative action of Pluto will eventually require you to redefine your identity and heal the gap between your inner and outer selves.

Saturn conjunct Mercury - tendency towards withdrawal and depression
Saturn in Scorpio - blockages channelled through sexual energies

Mercury / Saturn joined with South Node - karmic overtones

Venus/Uranus joined [ non-conformity and impulsiveness in relationships]
expectations out of sync with the norm; unusual or afflicted sense of self]
in the 12th house: [secrets, reclusiveness]

abundance of water, lack of air: socially uncomfortable or awkward. Needs the development of Air [social expressiveness] for balancing.

Scorpio Sun: you have the ability to beguile, control or manipulate others in your public activities, however your lessons in life are about Control over the emotions, rather than being a slave to them.

[Teddybull]

Lissa,
Hang in there. I can understand your shyness. I have a cap asc too with Saturn conjuncting it.

I have had to make an effort to be optimistic and friendly on the outside. People tell me I'm warm and friendly (aqua sun, gem moon). But it has taken a conscious effort to get there. When you think of Aqua sun/Gem moon, you think we are party animals, two air signs that love to talk lol! However, astro.com hit it on the nose...... it is a very reserved combo, hard to get to know, tho intellectually oriented.

But the shyness is mostly that cap going on. I HATE crowds and I have always been the first one to sneak out of loud parties, areas, gatherings. I try and blend in for a moment (please don't notice me!) then bolt lol! blessings, tb

[flea]

Hi Pixy,

I have been through the shyness thing and share a few things. I remember a time before people called me shy, when I was four I was more outgoing and loud. I have been labelled quiet reserved etc, by others, it kind of blocked me into being shy. Over the years I have noticed that I am very sensitive to what people say, imagining slights where there are none, but often sensitive to those who are not there in my best interests too.

I have Jupiter 1H and a water moon (cancer) and mars in capricorn. Jupiter in my case is retrograde in Gemini a sign that has been linked to shyness even though an air sign. I have inner belief but there is nothing really external that would indicate a first house jupiter. My Cancer moon is where my sensitivity lies. My mother and grandmother both had grand water trines like me and they sure protected themselves. I feel things, like people leave sticky bits of themselves on me.

I need to spend time on my own to process all the stuff I pick up static whatever, and use meditation to clear other people from my space. Crystals and positive visualisation I use too. The more aware I am of what is mine and what to get rid of the better I relate to people. I am shy for a reason, and part of that is a reminder to myself to protect me.

The stage (neptune) also provides protection and separation from the masses. Performers are often necessarily sensitive in order to access and express something not easily seen or felt or experieince. The performance amplifies something on stage that is not available to the audience off stage.

However I am in my forties and still wonder whether people are not ringing me on purpose. Then I realise they are just too busy with their lives to even think about it. Then I make the calls myself. This sensitivity is just part of me.

A cool book I found is called "Psychic Protection" by William Bloom. It is actually very straightforward and an easy read. Ideas like just shaking yourself silly so you can change the emotional head space. And it works!

I noticed also that you have cancer on the descendant which maybe an indicator that an emotionally nuturing space provided by others is something that is really good for you. Aries on the nadir can show a strong personal force/identity deeply rooted in the core of you.

I had a much more supportive environment in my upbringing yet I was very sensitive to continual agruements between my parents. I think that I picked up on some very strong negative vibes very early that I didn't talk to anyone about could explain, and they were therefore never resolved in a positive way for me. I retreated instead because that was my best option at the time for self preservation. Chiron in 5th may or may not point to something similar with yourself. If no one picks up the sensitivity when you are young and teaches you how to deal with it how can you expect yourself to naturally develop these talents. They are skills easily learnt but with all things be gentle with yourself and accepting and be the teacher to yourself that would have been perfect when you were young.

You have a strong chart that will support your growth and trust is something that is earnt over time, so you will know the people who you can be open with.

Love and Light
Flea

[Shining Ray]

I am very shy I have Saturn in the 1st/Virgo (asc) Saturn is Conjunct my Asc and opposes my Sun in Pisces. I have Moon in Pisces and Mercury in Pisces square to Neptune. Venus is in Capricorn.

I am very socially reserved. Very anxious and fearful of meeting new people. I hate feeling this way. It holds me back in life, I avoid social situations if I can, I feel so inferior being like this. I have tried not to be like this but when I do try and be more sociable and friendly and then fail miserably I feel even worse for trying. I look at other women who feel so confident about themselves, who can go out and feel good about who they are (or even if they don't feel good inside, they are able to project confidence.) which gets them by in life.

I also hate it when people tell you to stop being shy, like it is something you choose to be. Like you enjoy feeling uncomfortable and unable to act confident in a situation, like you enjoy feeling inferior to everyone on the planet. I wish it was something which could be changed overnight, and I could wake up the next day and live my life without feeling anxious about new situations and meeting people. What probably makes it worse is my oversensitivity as well, and caring so much about what other people think of me. My value lies in other people's opinion of me. I hate that side of my personality, the people pleaser who doesn't want to upset people. Or lets people push in front of her, walk all over her. I have not an ounce of assertiveness in me. My Sun/Saturn being so tight on the asc/dsc of my chart is probably the main reason for this social anxiety. And extreme shyness.

My sister is like the complete opposite to me but she has lots of Sagittarius in her chart so lots of energy, enthusiasm, and joy. She also has Moon in Aries square Mars so there is no walking all over her. She has a Virgo Asc like me and she is quiet at first but she warms up a lot quicker, because of her more natural friendliness. Maybe we were born as sisters to learn something off each other. ;)

[bellabixler]

Good thread.

It sounds like a lot of the posters are confusing social anxiety/avoidant personality with shyness. According to a book on social anxiety I read, the two are not the same. Social anxiety/phobia is the marked, persistent fear of social situations. People with social anxiety/phobia are extremely self-conscious and afraid of being judged, which leads them to never being relaxed in social situations. Shyness, on the other hand, is a wariness of strangers. Shy people may not necessarily be afraid or anxious of people, but it takes a while for them to warm up to others.

The reason I am so knowledgeable about social anxiety is because I am a social anxiety sufferer. I feel that this shows up in my chart mainly in my Virgo ascendant (Virgo is a sign that is filled with nervous energy, and has a reputation of being reserved), my Aries moon opposite Venus in Libra (which indicates possible social problems, especially with women), and the fact that nine out of ten of my planets are below the horizon. My Libra sun and Aries moon supposedly indicate an extroverted nature, but neither planet aspects my ascendant. I truly feel that I am showing the world a face (my Virgo ascendant) that does not accurately represent who I am (my Libra sun and Aries moon).

[astrobhadauria]

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c80/EvilPixyDust/MyChartNew.gif


Dear
By Vedic astrology nature of this chart is saying by "Dreshkana" (nature of person) This chart is describing that all Stars are having place from 10th to 2nd and this type person not a open person to other world.
Sun Sco.24.2 Feminine, dressed in dirty clothes, vessels on head, collects metal pieces in a blanket, in a forest of cotton trees.
Moon in Pic.54.12Feminine, quadruped, a woman wearing red clothes, fond of dressing up, pot belly, face resembles a horse, looks tired with thirst, standing on one foot.
Mercury Sco.16.54Feminine, serpent, a beautiful lady shorn of her clothes and ornaments, travelling from the middle of the lake to the shore, snakes have coiled around her legs.
Venus Seg.17.34Feminine, golden color, body covered with a wet white silk, tall, vessels on hand, going to a temple.

[woofwoofbarkbark07]

i used to be very shy as a child, but as soon as i warmed up to somebody i could relax and be myself, however when i hit my teens i got bullied and verbally abused frequently at the same time my parents were also going through a divorce, i've witnessed many violent physical fights between my parents and have had to separate the two of them so it was a terrible time for me. i began to withdraw and became very introverted and eventually became a recluse. i feel i have social anxiety, i have intense anxiety and i avoid social situations at all costs. whenever i'm in a social situation my heart pounds, i sweat, shake, i'm short of breath and my body also becomes stiff. i never go out and i drink a large amount of alcohol before i have to go out anywhere which involves social situations, such as college, which i know, is very bad! but it's the only way it helps me to open up, my counsellor won't give me meds or refer me to a psychologist.

please, is there anything in my natal chart which may indicate social anxiety or shyness?

thanks in advance!

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a219/IveGotTheRuns/arealbirthchart-1.gif

[astrobhadauria]

Dear,
Today your Moon in fifth and making more and more past thinking about yorself.The lord of 7th in the 6th house,and also in the position of destroying himself.Mars in the 8th house,destroying the image of friendship and desires,also there are more power to destroying communications.The 6th Jupiter giving helps to Saturn in 2nd house,and Saturn converitn the good to bad by the abusing.(Saturn in 2nd gives abusive talk and 8th mars mix the power of destroying).The time of this type disconectivity up to 10th September 2007.After this time there are a good soul is coming to give your desired things from the nature.God bless you.

[Belgianmoonguy]

Communication...
Mercury's in Virgo in 4 but intercepted...
Part of grand trine in Earth... so only good aspects...

Sun in 3 in Leo...
Normally very communicative and entertaining...
But making a quincunx to Saturn in Cap...
And part of a T square with Mars conjunct Moon (Asc Ruler) in 12 (house of addictions!) opposed to Pluto (in 5, almost 6)...
So communication, natural sunshine is under fire...

Don't misuse alcohol...
I know it sounds preachy, but you're so young, you have so much for you...

[wilsontc]

Tamara,

Uranus (friends, also rebellion) conjunct (energy is combined with) your Descendant (others), indicates either being around rebellious (maybe violent) people or being rebellious yourself. Now that you understand this is a "playing out" of your OWN rebellion, seek out people who do things "differently" who aren't ashamed of their own specialness. You will most likely feel more comfortable around these "rebels" than in the more typical people out there. Perhaps join an astrology club (Uranus rules astrology) and enjoy the "rebellions" of the members there.

Remember that, when we're children we are helpless to do anything other than react to our surroundings. We HAVE to trust our surroundings to be safe, even if they aren't. But once we grow up and STOP being children, we can take our power back and make our OWN decisions. All people are NOT looking for a fight all the time. Find the nice ones out there, talk to them, settle down, and stay away from parties! Parties are all about social pressure and you DON'T need that.

And, as you know, alcohol is a depressant, it makes a person LESS able to cope or react to situations around them. So let go of the alcohol, make a few "strange" friends and create the future YOU want to have! :)

Creating the future,

Tim

[Arian Maverick]

I agree with Tim--make friends with a maverick! :D

Arian Maverick

[StelliumGoat]

I feel I can really relate to everyone on this thread. As a kid I was always the shy and quiet type and have remained that way ever since. I think that my shyness has increased over the years, it's basically turned into a type of social anxiety. I also have a tendency to seem very cold, when actually I'm very sensitive. I think it's due to having Neptune and Saturn conjunct my ascendant which is in Capricorn. What I don't understand is, most people here seem to have an abundance of water or fire element in their charts which causes some of things they're talking about, while I only have one planet in water with an abundance of the earth element. Perhaps it's because the planet which is in the water element (pluto in scorpio) is on my midheaven which aspects my ascendant, that causes some similar effects to everyone else here.

Sometimes I find I can be very outgoing and slightly eccentric, or so people tell me after they've known me for a good while. I can sort of relate to whoever was posting about their stripper friend. I absolutely love performing such as singing or something that's drama related but otherwise I can a real hermit as times. Perhaps it's uranus on the ascendant or my aquarius sun or whatever.

[SimplyRed]

I have to agree about Uranus in seventh house. It indicates by some an extremely intelligent mate or you yourself becomes a extraordinary. I have found there is a lot more to it. LOL, Be a maverick for sure. I agree on that one.
Be different and enjoy it, if not you will draw in some highly unusual people and the could be unstable. That is the last thing you need. I have Cap rising and not a Leo sun sign for sure. So, believe me I have not always been out there being ms extroversion.
The seventh house and 12th are your least aware houses.

Sorry to hear about your parents. It is hard when both parents argue and fight.

You have moon trine mercury. What a gift. emotions and logic working well together.

Your sun is opposed neptune, tricky and be wary of something that sounds too good to be true.
By progressions, in about 3 to 5 years, Venus will progress to your sun. A time of wonderful beginnings.

[Lunarloops]

Hi Pixie,

Given that your Mercury lies in scorpio, I would imagine there is much depth in your thoughts but these are not so easy to express with a conjunction to saturn as this tends to block or dampen verbal expression.

Neptune, the ruler of your natal third house is located in the 12th which may indicate that "you are most at home when your thoughts & ideas aren't verbalised" (neptune at home in the 12th). It also conjuncts your ascendant in capricorn giving a certain seriousness on first meeting.

However, there is always a flipside.

Mercury conjunct saturn can give determination & focus....great mental strength and the ability to overcome with age (we grow into our saturn)those voices in our heads that initially stop us or scare us from moving forward. You may not realise it now, but Mercury in the 11th conj saturn in the 10th can indicate the ability to talk to the masses...imparting what you know, clearly and thoroughly (teaching ?)

As for that Neptune so happy where it is...learn to love it and the sensitivity it gives you......it's a blessing. And listen to what your dreams are telling you.