Relationship of three

[Aurora]

Dear all,

Can someone tell me where do I stand in this two_women_and_one_man" relationship? Who he loves more? who he wants to be with? Anything you can tell me about this is warmly appreciataed

I'm the querent. (",)

Thank you


http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4815/33wv.gif (http://imageshack.us)

[Aurora]

I forgot to add that he is going through a separation with official divorce pending. His first wife is using their children as a tool to manipulate him. He claimed there is no more love for her. is he being truthful?

Thanks (",)

[Summery Joy]

This is a toughie.

OK. You are signified by Venus at Aquarius 11:29 in the 4th house. Venus has a very minor essential dignity by being in its own face. And being in the 4th house is not a very good accidental spot. It is however received by Saturn by sign and Mercury by triplicity and term.

He is not committed to you since he's still officially married so he is ruled by the 5th house of which the cusp is in Aquarius. This makes him Saturn Rx at Leo 4:40 in the 10th house (his turned 6th).

Saturn is essentially debilitated by being in its sign of detriment and in retrograde motion. It is in its own term and face though. It is received by the Sun by sign and Jupiter by triplicity.

His wife is ruled by his turned 7th house (the radical 11th) which is in Leo. This makes her significator the Sun at Pisces 27:47 in the 6th house (her 8th and his 2nd). The Sun is essentially peregrine and is received by Jupiter by sign and face, Venus by exaltation and Mars by triplicity and face.

Jupiter received his and her significators so I'm inclined to see what it rules in this chart. Sagittarius is found on the cusp of the 3rd house. That's his 11th (friends) and her 5th (her children). Pisces is found on the cusp of the 6th house. That's his 2nd (his money) her 8th (their shared money). Jupiter is in retrograde motion.

Alright. This is what I get out of this chart:

He is not interested in his marriage to her anymore. She seems to be more interested the money and the benefit of the children, but she still cares for him. He is in a very tough spot and although you think highly of him (his significator in your 10th house), he feels very weak and worried (his significator in his 6th house). He is still stuck in his problems with his wife though. He has not yet made a final decision about her even if he tells you other wise. The Rx motion of his significator shows him going back to old issues. Feelings wise, he cares for you more (his significator received yours).

I don't understand why there is no clues in this chart about your feelings for him though. It just seems like you're stuck in your past or holding on to old dreams, but I don't see any sign of you loving him. Very strange. Also, you significator is in his 12th house. Is there a secret you are keeping from him or do you in any way feel that he doesn't understand you or know you enough?

Anyway, your position in this relationship is like this: he has more feelings for you than he does for her. But the facts that she still cares for him, that they have children together and that he might lose a lot of his money are standing in his way of making the final decision about his marriage to her.

The fact that the final aspect the Moon perfects before leaving its current sign is a trine with her significator (the Sun) leads me to think that even he promises you a relationship or even starts one with you, he'll end up making up with his wife and going back to her.

[Aurora]

sorehearted,

Thank you for this.

I would like to clarify a few points you've made, if its o.k?

He is not committed to you since he's still officially married so he is ruled by the 5th house of which the cusp is in Aquarius. This makes him Saturn Rx at Leo 4:40 in the 10th house (his turned 6th).

He is separated with is wife and we are in a relationship. Though there is a marriage binding(lawfully) but they are separated. His wife refused to sign the documents to dissolve the marriage that explains their marriage is still legal-biding. Other than that, they have no connections. According to our state's law, if the other party refused to file for divorce, the couple has to be separated for 5 years and the legal marriage status will be dissolved. They have been separated for 3+ years! When they are separated, his wife got involved in another relationship but she can't work out with the other and comes back to him. His wife is using his children to manipulate him and causing hindrance in our relationship. Their children stay with her since their separation.

He is not interested in his marriage to her anymore. She seems to be more interested the money and the benefit of the children, but she still cares for him. He is in a very tough spot and although you think highly of him (his significator in your 10th house), he feels very weak and worried (his significator in his 6th house). He is still stuck in his problems with his wife though. He has not yet made a final decision about her even if he tells you other wise. The Rx motion of his significator shows him going back to old issues. Feelings wise, he cares for you more (his significator received yours).

You mean she is more interested in his wealth? If she is, why doesn't she want a divorce to get the alimony? But I thought she is rich enough? I don't think she still care or love him, is more of an indulgence in the superior feeling of manipulating him. I've no doubt she does cares for their children but not him really.

I don't understand why there is no clues in this chart about your feelings for him though. It just seems like you're stuck in your past or holding on to old dreams, but I don't see any sign of you loving him. Very strange. Also, you significator is in his 12th house. Is there a secret you are keeping from him or do you in any way feel that he doesn't understand you or know you enough?

I do love him. Why isn't there any sign of me loving him? The chart shows that I don't care for him? We have fought through obstacles and disapprovals from friends and family to get together.. I do treasure this but his wife is fueling our relationship with snow.

Secrets.. sure, I do have my own secrets but those secrets won't be affecting our relationship. Could it be me not telling him how affected I am by his first wife and my trust for his is diminishing? I'm rather disappointed with him for not being firm with his first wife.

Anyway, your position in this relationship is like this: he has more feelings for you than he does for her. But the facts that she still cares for him, that they have children together and that he might lose a lot of his money are standing in his way of making the final decision about his marriage to her.

you mean He will lose a lot of money if they divorced?

The fact that the final aspect the Moon perfects before leaving its current sign is a trine with her significator (the Sun) leads me to think that even he promises you a relationship or even starts one with you, he'll end up making up with his wife and going back to her.

You mean he is going back to her???!! We are already in a relationship and have started one for 2+ years. you mean even if he has more feelings for me, he is going back to her because he is unwilling to lose the money for divorce, alimony and custody and because she still care for him? I'm sorry, I'm not questioning your reading but want to find out the reasons he will choose to go back to her. They have no love for each other, don't they?


yours sincerely,
Aurora

[Aurora]

I'm sorry to ask ... when will he make a decision to go back to his first wife? soon?

[Summery Joy]

Hey Aurora,

I'm gald you posted those comments because trhey have made a lot of things clearer.

First of all, I didn't say the chart shows that you don't love him. It just doesn't stress on the fact that you do. Now I know why; you're asking this question out of doubt

my trust for his is diminishing


Hmm.. I don't know why the chart shows her to be interested in money. OK. Maybe I've used the wrong term. The 2nd house may be his "valuables", not necessarily his money. Valuables here could be material or not, so I don't know what valuables she's interested in and he's afraid of losing. Maybe it's the social concept of having a family of mother, father and children; a highly appreciated social image that is being destroyed by the divorce.

Her caring for him is true though. Maybe she gets involved in other relationships, but if she didn't care for him, don't you think she would have signed the divorce papers by now?

Here's a different interpretation of the Moon's last aspect (that trine with the wife's significator). Maybe going back to her means resolving the issues. There's is something that I initially saw but didn't say because I didn't know what to do with it. Now that you've explained things, I think I understand.

See, the Sun (wife significator) is at Pisces 27:47. When a significator is in the last 3 degrees of a sign, it usually shows that the person signified by the planet is going through a transitional stage of some sort and soon will be doing something different. Now, I didn't know they were going through the divorce for more than 3 years. Maybe she's about to accept it and then come to terms with her husband who will then be her ex.

I must explain on what I said

He is not committed to you since he's still officially married


I didn't mean that he was not committed because he didn't want to. He just can't. He's married. That said, I'd like to repeat that no matter how this thing ends, he has more feelings for you than he does for her.

Last thing, which not related to the chart though. You said
I'm rather disappointed with him for not being firm with his first wife.

You said it yourself, he keeps asking her to sign the papers and she refuses. All he can do is wait for the State to declare their 5 year separation a divorce. Why are you disappointed with him?

[Aurora]

sorehearted,

Thanks for sheding more lights on this.

Hmm.. I don't know why the chart shows her to be interested in money. OK. Maybe I've used the wrong term. The 2nd house may be his "valuables", not necessarily his money. Valuables here could be material or not, so I don't know what valuables she's interested in and he's afraid of losing. Maybe it's the social concept of having a family of mother, father and children; a highly appreciated social image that is being destroyed by the divorce.

I'll take a guess on this...

His family is wealthy and traditional, regards divorce as something disrepectful to their tradition and a disgrace to the family. He is an aspiring singer.. gaining financial support from his family to fuel his dream. He MAYBE afraid the family will stop supporting him if he divorced and his wife MAYBE interested in the comfortable upper class living, enjoy the social status that his family provides.

I don't know... just a a wild guess..

Her caring for him is true though. Maybe she gets involved in other relationships, but if she didn't care for him, don't you think she would have signed the divorce papers by now?

I strongly believe if she is able to work out her other relationship, she wouldn't be coming back for him. They separated for 2 years and his wife came back with their children with strong desire to get involved in his life again, last year. I don't know if she cares for him as in love or she is interested in him out of jealousy.

See, the Sun (wife significator) is at Pisces 27:47. When a significator is in the last 3 degrees of a sign, it usually shows that the person signified by the planet is going through a transitional stage of some sort and soon will be doing something different. Now, I didn't know they were going through the divorce for more than 3 years. Maybe she's about to accept it and then come to terms with her husband who will then be her ex.

I really don't know now. From your reading on the chart, that is "some thingg" he is afraid of losing and she is interested in... something that bind them together which they hate to lose. Both of them want that "some thing". I really don't know now if they will resolved the issues and get back together or they will resolved the issues to end... ... I don't know what that he is afraid of losing... is the 2nd house about money?

You said it yourself, he keeps asking her to sign the papers and she refuses. All he can do is wait for the State to declare their 5 year separation a divorce. Why are you disappointed with him?

His wife uses their children to control him and keep using their children as an excuse to keep him and want him to do something for them. I don't mind their children and I do love children but his wife is delibrately using them as a tool to control him. She will get their children to call him and ask him back for dinner daily, buy them breakfast daily, buy them supper, stay in over the weekends, family trips over the weekends... etc When they were together, they have NEVER had dinner together as a family, they have NEVER had any family trips or weekends outings.. She is really making an attempt to get involved in his life this time. It's appropriate and acceptable for him to spend time with their children but she is making it as a MUST and a tool.

I do feel insecure with them getting back together... .... especially after knowing there is "some thing" that both of them are afraid of losing. I'm losing faith on us... ... if we can last for another 2 years if his wife refused to let him go to lead his own life and if they will really be able to dissolve the marriage status?

Should I use another chart to ask if they will get back together or if they will not? maybe I should ask if we will be able to stay together after they have resolved the issues that trine the sun?

Should I and can I?

thanks sincerely, (",)
Aurora

[Aurora]

sorehearted,

more to add on this... ...

You said it yourself, he keeps asking her to sign the papers and
she refuses. All he can do is wait for the State to declare their 5 year separation a divorce. Why are you disappointed with him?

This is what I know from him... ... the wife refused to sign the papers when he wanted a divorce. The wife lost contact with him since.. he didn't keep asking her to sign the papers since she has lost contact. We got together about one year after their separation.

This is what I know from myself and being in it... ... his wife came back for him last year and that's when they got back in touch.

sincerely, (".)
aurora

[Aurora]

some more thoughts to add... ...

I know both of us would not have a marriage because his family is strongly against him re-married. I know we won't gain any approval or support from his family and my family will be raising objection for not having a formal arrangement in our relationship but I'm fine with this. My family though would want me to have a more formal arrangement but they will still respect my choice, but his family won't. That's fine as I know it the moment I decided to get together with him. however... ... my faith for him to be independent from financial support by his family is diminishing... ... strangely, I'm afraid he will choose money over me... ... now.

sincerely, (",)
Aurora

[Summery Joy]

Well, you can ask the question of whether or not they will get back together, but you gotta use the time of when you first thought fo that question, be that when you were writing the reply or even before.

How about you just talk to him about your concerns. Why is that not an option for you? I mean, maybe you should wait until Mercury goes direct again, but you should still communicate with him.

Don't tell him she's using the kids and that he should be firm with her about that. They are his kids. No matter how much sense you make, you're gonna end up being the bad guy. Just try to find out what his concerns for the future are and things like that. Note that in the horary, his signioficator is in Rx motion. His concerns are likely to be about things from the past. Also, he's signified by Saturn. Saturn is a restricted planet. Maybe you should ask him what he needs to feel free.

Anyway, whatever you do, do not live in worries based on this horary. I do believe in astrology. But's only a tool for us. It's no fate. You have free will and, with the help of the horary, you have a hint of what may be going on. Use that and talk to him.

[Aurora]

Well, you can ask the question of whether or not they will get back together, but you gotta use the time of when you first thought fo that question, be that when you were writing the reply or even before.

I forgot the exact time and maybe I can use the time now to do a chart.

How about you just talk to him about your concerns. Why is that not an option for you? I mean, maybe you should wait until Mercury goes direct again, but you should still communicate with him.

Don't tell him she's using the kids and that he should be firm with her about that. They are his kids. No matter how much sense you make, you're gonna end up being the bad guy. Just try to find out what his concerns for the future are and things like that. Note that in the horary, his signioficator is in Rx motion. His concerns are likely to be about things from the past. Also, he's signified by Saturn. Saturn is a restricted planet. Maybe you should ask him what he needs to feel free.

That's where the anxieties build up within me. I do not want to pressure him or restrain him nor forcing him to do something to cut off the ties. Neither do I want to refrain him from visiting his children. I know how important it is for the children to get attention and love from both parents and I don't want to stop him for doing so. I'm more angry with his wife for using their children as a tool. If she wants him back, show that she cares for him first before using their children to control him. She left and came back as she pleased, did she ever take into considreation his feelings in the first place? I'm soryr, this is not a chart question, just part of ranting...

[Aurora]

I asked similar questions at different date. I don't know which is the one to be used now.

First is this... weeks ago. I found it at my Astro database. I forgot about this until I saw it now.

http://img353.imageshack.us/img353/9948/1st2bl.gif (http://imageshack.us)


this is the chart of now.

http://img123.imageshack.us/img123/2104/love9hh.gif (http://imageshack.us)

[Aurora]

Hi,

can someone help me with this? the above first chart was done on 9th march and the other was done on 19th march. I did the 2nd one before I realized I had a chart done on same question. Which chart is valid for use?

Thanks sincerely,
Aurora (",)

[Springup]

:D Hi Aurora,

Your situation is rather similar to a friend of mine. both of you are caught in a triangle relationship of a "two women and one man" which you have described.

The major difference is her being kept in the dark not knowing the man, whom she loves, is married. The man keep that as a secret until she found out herself. I can understand your frustration and hurt as I see how my friend's world was collapsed when she found out the man she loves, the one who promised her the world is cheating her and she has unknowingly become an "intruder" of someone's marriage.

It is frustrated to be in a relationship of three despite individual's emotions involved.

I've a keen interest in relationship horary and your situation has caught my attention and keeness to study and learn from it. Ever since my friend's case, I'm exceptionally interested in a triangle relationship studies especially how I see sorehearted had helped my friend with the situation. Horary is really amazing! It won't do you any justice if I attempt to share with you my interpretation because I'm still at a very very early stage of learning and its usually 99% wrong!

I'd like to offer my positive prayers and thoughts and hope you will be able to find a balance in your situation and everything turns out to be the best for everyone involved. The loves will unite with the loves and the other will leave positively knowing the future is brighter.

My best wishes,
SG